Is it licit for me to receive Communion? (Cohabitation)

[Gorgias]

Gorgias:

the person’s willingness and ability to follow through on the promise of a chastity that he hasn’t lived out yet, to date

To be fair I don’t think the OP has stated that he is the baby’s father. It is possible that no sin was committed by him or his fiancee. I do agree that living together with a pregnant woman will lead to assumptions but living together without her being pregnant/having children would also.

OK… I’ve said it about twenty times in this thread, but I’ll say it again: the sin of ‘scandal’ isn’t about whether a person is sinning or not – it’s about the reaction that their actions have on others.

@Pup7 expresses another common misconception about the sin of scandal – namely, that it’s about judging a sinner. That, too, is not the case!

The sin of scandal is all about a misunderstanding of what one witnesses. But, the misunderstanding isn’t what’s sinful, either! The sin of scandal has a simple, easy to understand basis: I witness something that you do, and I misunderstand it. I think that you’re doing something that I thought was a sin. But, since I see you doing it – and since I know you’re a good, solid Christian! – I see what you’re doing and I say to myself, “well, I thought that was sinful, but if @Elf01 is doing it, and he’s a stand-up guy, I guess it really is something that’s good to do!”

The sin isn’t in your action, per se.

The sin isn’t in my misunderstanding.

The sin is in the fact that your action leads me into temptation and into the sin (which you, yourself, aren’t committing)!

Your action isn’t sinful, in itself. It’s only sinful insofar as it leads me into sin. That’s precisely what St Paul is talking about in 1 Corinthians 8.

 

[Pup7]

So, what’s false is your attempt to characterize the sin in terms of something that’s completely irrelevant.

It wasn’t a false attempt. It was conversation. Don’t accuse me of things I’m not doing.

You made it about the OP’s attempt to regularize his situation and their desire to follow the instructions of his pastor. That’s completely false – and has nothing to do with the sin of scandal that is the topic at hand! Scandal doesn’t arise from “attempting to regularize one’s situation” or from “following the instruction of a priest”! Rather, it arises from someone’s misunderstanding of a situation and the resulting temptation to commit the sin that he believes the other person, also, is committing.

I know that. Holy smoke. I’m not quite as thick as you seem to believe I am.

You’re barely reading what I type, so I’m done here. You’re clearly not listening to me.

Actually, now that I’m skimming a bit more, you’re not really reading most of what others are saying.

 

[Pup7]

With all due respect @Pup7, you’re missing the boat on this one. Scandal absolutely isn’t about judging a person! In fact, it’s the opposite of judging! It’s the result of using someone as an example for your own behavior – but, it’s about being mistaken, and thinking that they’re doing something that you had previously thought was wrong, and about doing it because you think that their example is showing you that it’s all OK.

In this case, it’s not about judging the OP, it’s about thinking, “well, if he can do it, so can I!” … without properly understanding the circumstances.

I’m not TALKING about “scandal”. I’m talking about people minding their own business, not worrying about what someone else may or may not be doing, and praying for their fellow man. Simple. Because I don’t equate this situation with anything you’ve been going on about.

 

[Reuben_J]

I don’t see much point in arguing here. Advice for the OP to go ahead with the Confession and to move on his life is probably being diluted here. Instead we are talking about scandal, which are two separate things altogether.

Even if it is, it would be rather harsh for the OP. I would still maintain that it is also limiting the grace of the Sacrament of Confession.

Personally I do not believe it is a scandal but rather a very humbling example of people who submit themselves to the Sacrament instead of defying it. I guess other people will feel compassionate for this case rather than see it as a scandal. And perhaps an encouragement for those who are in similar situation to go back to the Church, receiving the forgiveness of God and made right with Him through the grace given to the Church.

It is just my two cents. Am not interested in arguing this with the poster . I guess we see some people like this in the parish, but each should be entitled to his opinion.

 

[Pup7]

You’re correct, and I agree with you - but I don’t think anyone here was arguing with the poster.

I don’t think any of this has anything to do with scandal in the least, either.

 

[Gorgias]

I know that. Holy smoke. I’m not quite as thick as you seem to believe I am.

LOL… no, I don’t believe you’re “thick”. I think you’re conflating the secular notion of ‘scandal’ with the theological definition that the Church discusses.

You’re barely reading what I type, so I’m done here. You’re clearly not listening to me.

No… I am. And I’m responding to it. May the grace of Christ fill your heart and lead you to all wisdom.

 

[Pup7]

For the last time, as I’ve said multiple times - this has nothing to do with the definition of scandal. Any definition of scandal, to be honest. That’s not what this is about.

May the grace of Christ fill your heart and lead you to all wisdom - as well.

 

[LittleFlower]

Praying for you and your fiancee, that you may have a Christ and joy filled marriage. ray:t2:

 

[MaryT777]

Finally, it’s important to recognize that the person’s pastor is the p

I definitely agree with this post Make an appt for confession and the priest also would like to discuss an issue with him so he can allow the appropriate amount of time so he is not rushed.

God bless.

 

[TheLittleLady]

Scandal does not mean what you appear to think it means. Scandal is not “I am offended because I think he is sinning!”

2284 Scandal is an attitude or behavior which leads another to do evil. The person who gives scandal becomes his neighbor’s tempter. He damages virtue and integrity; he may even draw his brother into spiritual death. Scandal is a grave offense if by deed or omission another is deliberately led into a grave offense.

 

[joeybaggz]

A single woman exits a young man’s apartment at 7 a.m. I appears she spent the night with him, probably in bed. It could be totally innocent but it appears… It is witnessed by the young man’s sixteen year old next door neighbor who looks up to him. Legitimate reason, or scandal?? I reiterate, scandal and appearance go hand in hand.
And I do know what scandal means in the spiritual sense.

 

[Pup7]

A neighbor tried that on me once. She felt pretty stupid when I informed her the “younger man” visiting in my husband’s conspicuous absence was my 37 year old nephew.

You don’t know if it’s a legitimate reason. You’re assuming what went on - but it’s not your business.

 

[Canvas]

On order for Scandal to be a mortal sin, you have to intentionally lead others to sin. You also have to be aware person X is that vulnerable to being influenced by your example. If you have no idea person x is following your personal affairs and did not intend for them to sin, then that will not meet the criteria for the mortal sin of Scandal.

 

[Arwing]

On order for Scandal to be a mortal sin, you have to intentionally lead others to sin. You also have to be aware person X is that vulnerable to being influenced by your example. If you have no idea person x is following your personal affairs and did not intend for them to sin, then that will not meet the criteria for the mortal sin of Scandal.

I think it could be either/or with less strict conditions than that. If I have a well-founded reason to believe (not just the kind of scrupulous worries we see on here from time to time) that what I am doing will lead another person into serious sin (culpable or no), then I am obligated to, as far as is reasonably possible, avoid doing whatever it is in their presence or otherwise remove the occasion of scandal, whether I intend their sin or not. And, well, if I intend to lead someone to a serious sin without knowing if they are vulnerable to my influence, it is still clearly a mortal sin on my part.

With proper awareness and consent my intentional failure to do this would, I am quite certain, be a mortal sin of scandal on my part.

Of course direct scandal by which I intend that another commit a serious sin is worse, but we still have an obligation to avoid leading others into sin by our actions/omissions (i.e. “scandal of the weak”). I do know that the Catechism speaks of “deliberate” action but it is by no means exhaustive.

Note that I am not speaking specifically on the matter being discussed in this topic… for that I only say what Gorgias and others have already said, that the OP should speak to his priest about it and get his approval before doing anything.

 

[TheLittleLady]

To add to these words, “rash judgement” is a sin.