Is it morally wrong to want no more children at 48 yrs old?

[liv3ordie]

This is a kind of spill your guts question but I’m really looking for some advice. My wife and I have 5 beautiful children. The 5th was a foster child whom we adopted, now 3 yrs old. The biological mother of the foster child is about to give birth again and DSS is going to take her child at birth. We have been naturally contacted to see if we want it. Complication #1: My wife recently had 2 miscarriages. She believes this was God’s will so we could take in this baby. Complication 2: My wife has been praying about it for months and says God clearly wants her to take this baby in. Complication 3: I’m 48 yrs old and really don’t want another baby. By the time this child leaves home I’ll be 66 at the earliest. I just want to be done with diapers, etc…My wife is determined to adopt this baby and I’m really having a hard time with all this! She says Satan is influencing me. Is it just me? Am I really being unreasonable?

 

[Scott_Waddell]

liv3ordie:

Complication 2: My wife has been praying about it for months and says God clearly wants her to take this baby in.

And how much have you been praying over this? I’m not trying to be a smart-alec, but I recommend you not only pray over this (if you have not already), but pray together with your wife over it. You should at least be open to the idea of adoption and communicate that to her so she knows you are with her instead of her trying to close you like a car salesman.

Scott

 

[vern_humphrey]

How much do you want to preserve your marriage? This child will be a problem to you if you adopt, and to your wife if you don’t.

The odds are, however, that you will come to love the child and feel blessed. It is unlikely however that your wife, in years to come will come to love NOT having the child.

 

[WhiteDove]

I reccomend that you seek third party counseling. Perhaps your parish priest can guide you.

No, it’s not unreasonable to not want any more children at your age. I am almost 48 myself, have 6 children and definately don’t want any more. I, too, don’t want to be tied down. I don’t want to be waken up at night. I don’t want to worry about naps. I want to enjoy my youngest 2 children who are still at home and not be tied down with a baby again. (my husband is dead, so that definately isn’t a possiblity, however)