Is it wrong to cal someone "sexy"?

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scameter18

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Would it be immoral to call someone sexy as a compliment? Even in the context of a relationship?
 
I despise the word ‘sexy’. I’d probably slap someone if they called me ‘sexy’.

I don’t know about immoral but it’s distasteful. To me, ‘sexy’ represents a wider cultural attitude that women are basically sex objects, expected to dress in a certain way, show off as much of their bodies as possible to attract men and be judged for it. Calling someone ‘sexy’ judges them as a body, not as a person.

In a relationship I suppose it’s different. Not a dating relationship mind you, but in a marriage I wouldn’t be offended by it in the same way I would otherwise because it’s a different dynamic.

There are better ways to ‘compliment’ someone that using the word ‘sexy’.

That’s just my two cents.
 
I dont see it as a sin. You are just giving them a compliment like you would say that they ade an awesome looking creation of Gods. There is a wrestler that I really love to see on tv. Whats his name? Big Sexy Kevin Nash. I feel the name is telling the truth and no false advertisement. Someone also could have a bad day and you saying that to them would make them feel good. Also it would help someone with a low self esteem to feel good about the way they look…
 
PerfectTiming said:
I despise the word ‘sexy’. I’d probably slap someone if they called me ‘sexy’.

I don’t know about immoral but it’s distasteful. To me, ‘sexy’ represents a wider cultural attitude that women are basically sex objects, expected to dress in a certain way, show off as much of their bodies as possible to attract men and be judged for it. Calling someone ‘sexy’ judges them as a body, not as a person.

In a relationship I suppose it’s different. Not a dating relationship mind you, but in a marriage I wouldn’t be offended by it in the same way I would otherwise because it’s a different dynamic.

There are better ways to ‘compliment’ someone that using the word ‘sexy’.

That’s just my two cents.
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I completely agree. I just wanted to see people’s general opinion of this. 😃 And great to see a Catholic from the UK!
 
PerfectTiming said:
I despise the word ‘sexy’. I’d probably slap someone if they called me ‘sexy’.

I don’t know about immoral but it’s distasteful. To me, ‘sexy’ represents a wider cultural attitude that women are basically sex objects, expected to dress in a certain way, show off as much of their bodies as possible to attract men and be judged for it. Calling someone ‘sexy’ judges them as a body, not as a person.

In a relationship I suppose it’s different. Not a dating relationship mind you, but in a marriage I wouldn’t be offended by it in the same way I would otherwise because it’s a different dynamic.

There are better ways to ‘compliment’ someone that using the word ‘sexy’.

That’s just my two cents.
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Such as…?
 
scameter18 said:
Would it be immoral to call someone sexy as a compliment? Even in the context of a relationship?
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Depends on the thoughts of the giver of the compliment.
Personally i wouldn’t say that to a person i didn’t know well.
 
PerfectTiming said:
I despise the word ‘sexy’. I’d probably slap someone if they called me ‘sexy’.

I don’t know about immoral but it’s distasteful. To me, ‘sexy’ represents a wider cultural attitude that women are basically sex objects, expected to dress in a certain way, show off as much of their bodies as possible to attract men and be judged for it. Calling someone ‘sexy’ judges them as a body, not as a person.

In a relationship I suppose it’s different. Not a dating relationship mind you, but in a marriage I wouldn’t be offended by it in the same way I would otherwise because it’s a different dynamic.

There are better ways to ‘compliment’ someone that using the word ‘sexy’.

That’s just my two cents.
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Agree and highly disagree.

I’ve had many male friends over the years confess that slutty is not sexy. Is it a turn-on, sure, but only momentarily, until as they say ~ “they open their mouths and start talking”…

Ask any man why he found his wife or girlfriend attractive, or ‘sexy’. Typically it’s because of the way they carry themselves, their demeanor, the way they handled a situation.

To them, ‘sexy’ is all about confidence and attitude. It’s because the man was intrigued by something the woman did or said… that’s “sexy”…
 
My issue with the term sexy is its exclusive sexual connotation, as though a woman’s attractiveness was entirely due to her sex appeal. For example, for the above comment that slutty is only sexy until they “open their mouth and talk”, that contradicts the meaning of sexy. A slutty-looking woman is sexy precisely because that’s what she’s trying to do - sex. To look not only available but interested in sex. If the way they talk is meaningful, it goes beyond the limits of “sexy”. I think far better compliments would be beautiful, gorgeous (which I think is a better form of sexy), lovely, attractive, etc. And also some compliments of her personality, such as kind, sweet, cute, faithful, etc.
 
“Sexy” means “desirous to have sex with.”
If that’s what they’re going for, then sure, that’s fine.

For example, if a wife tells her husband that he looks sexy in his workout gear, that’s perfectly legitimate, if it means that she feels sexually attracted to him.

Likewise, if some women are shopping for lingerie to wear for their husbands, one woman might say that another is sexy, not in that she particularly is desirous of the woman, but that she imagines the husband would be.

So replace “sexy” with “desirous to have sex with,” and see if it still an appropriate comment. If not, then don’t say it.
 
scameter18 said:
My issue with the term sexy is its exclusive sexual connotation, as though a woman’s attractiveness was entirely due to her sex appeal.
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I’ll agree with the first part that sexy has a sexual connotation. The rest depends on culture.

As far as calling someone sexy, since it has a sexual connotation, I would reserve it to people that intend on getting married to each other. There’s really nothing wrong with viewing a future spouse in that way, provided it doesn’t lead to the occasion of sin.
 
Catholics have no business contemplating their desire to have sex with somebody or their hypothetical willingness to do in some other life in which fornication were not a sin. Associations with openness to premarital sex, even speculative and joking, should be avoided.
 
With people who are engaged, I think it is no different than for those who are just dating, just as sex with engaged people is still premarital. However, I do think that sexual attraction is different than lust. Lust is more imaginative and possessive. Sexual attraction we often cannot help. However, we should try to avoid turning someone into a mere object for our sexual gratification, even our spouse. Sex should always be within marriage and within the context of love and self-giving, not just gratification.
 
scameter18 said:
Would it be immoral to call someone sexy as a compliment? Even in the context of a relationship?
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👍

Think of the word orange.

Any thoughts come to mind?

Think of the word sex.

Any thoughts come to mind?

Of course, in both cases.

When you describe someone as sexy, are there not inappropriate thoughts associated?

Of course, which is why you used the adjective.

Therein is why it is wrong to not only call someone sexy, but to think it as well.

🙂
 
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