Is Marriage Possible

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Budgie

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Hi everyone,
I am new to the forum and would like to send out a friendly hello to all. My question is this…can a Protestant marry a catholic and have a healthy relationship founded in Christ? I myself am Protestant and my fiancee is catholic. currently we have a 7 week old newborn and we are wondering if it is possible for our relationship to work.

Any advice would help!!!
thanks

God Bless
 
I guess the only answer I can give you is: “It depends.”

How much do you both practice, believe and love your separate faiths? How important is it for each of you to raise your children in that faith? So far all I know is that you have a child with your fiance, which means there are aspects of her Catholic faith she has not been practicing. I do not know what Protestant faith you belong to, but most also prohibit sex outside of marriage.

Do you expect that she will convert someday? Does she expect the same of you? Will either of you be disappointed if that doesn’t happen? It will take an extraordinary amount of communication and understanding on both sides in order to make an inter-faith marriage work.

I would suggest speaking with a religious leader about your specific situation. Then I would say you should also speak with your fiance and address your concerns together. She may have some of her own.
 
Based on the very few circumstances you provided I’m guessing neither of you are actively committed to living out your faith in conformity with your respective churches. However, I commend you on your interest in doing so.

The first step on the path is getting educated. Contact the priest in your fiancee’s parish and the minister in your own. Learn the basic tenants of the respective faiths as well as the expectations of you as members. Perhaps they can even introduce you a young married couple in the parish to act as “mentors” as you study. You then need to pray–for guidance and insight as to which denomination offers you a true path to God. If you plan to marry in the Catholic Church–you will be required to attend marriage preparation classes.

This is a process that will take some time and discussion between the two of you–as well as a lifetime of dedication. Best wishes as you take your first steps.
 
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Budgie:
currently we have a 7 week old newborn and we are wondering if it is possible for our relationship to work.
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Of course it can “work”! God was bringing children into the world for men and women who had “become one flesh” thousands of years before there were even Protestants and Catholics! And now God has so decided to bless you and your fiance. It is your duty to live up to that blessing. It can and will “work” if you do two things:

(1) Commit yourselves without question to the responsibility of caring for your child and each other. That is, no reservations. Banish such thoughts forever. Don’t expect to always be “in love.” Rather *choose *to love each other every day. At some point you will feel frustrated, unfulfilled or disappointed, perhaps profoundly so. That is not the marriage’s fault. NOTHING in this life will ever completely satisfy you. At such times, pray, pray, pray…preferably together.

(2) Pray, pray, pray. Put serving God before all else. Love Him with your whole heart, mind, and strength. Do that, and your love for Him will spill out into everything else you touch, certainly towards your spouse and children.

As a Catholic I of course believe that if you trust God completely He will lead you into His Church. But that is a secondary question. Trusting Him comes first before all else. And right now that means trusting Him by participating fully in the family that He has brought together: father, mother and child. There will be difficulties. Some disagreements about religion will certainly come. That is the cross He has given you. Now get under it, lift and start walking.

And pray, pray, pray.

In Christ’s love,
Todd
 
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Budgie:
Hi everyone,
I am new to the forum and would like to send out a friendly hello to all. My question is this…can a Protestant marry a catholic and have a healthy relationship founded in Christ? I myself am Protestant and my fiancee is catholic. currently we have a 7 week old newborn and we are wondering if it is possible for our relationship to work.

Any advice would help!!!
thanks

God Bless
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Is it possible? Of course. My parents were married 53 years. My mother Catholic, my father Protestant (who attended Catholic Mass with my mother for 53 years) and became Catholic and a daily Communicant, a year before he died.

However in your situation I would suggest as many pastors and even some Bishops require that you live apart and not consider Marriage until the baby is two years old. This clarifies that the couple are entering Marriage for the Sacrament of Marriage and not “for the baby”. Which in most cases becomes an issue in many annulments. “We felt at the time that we should, needed to or had to, marry for the sake of the child.”
 
Thank you for your response. I find it interesting the comment about having the child two years old before entering marriage simply for the reason of not marrying for that purpose. I never heard of that before. We however were engaged long before we became blessed with a child and I have went through the marriage course at the catholic church and he went to mine.

any other comments is appreciated
 
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