Is my family right to refuse to attend my brother's wedding?

[JMJ01]

My brother’s wedding is in July 2010. He has been Catholic since he was an infant. He is 24 years old now and met a girl who is non-denominational. He wrote my mom and dad a letter stating he is leaving the Church because its teachings are wrong and all you need is the Bible. My parents and I have decided not to attend his wedding because we believe what he is doing is wrong. If we were to go, we believe that would be saying what he is doing is okay and we do not want to feel like we are condoning his choices. I was just wondering if we made the right decision and just wanted another opinion.

 

[Michelle_Arnold]

Whether or not to attend the wedding of someone marrying outside the Church is a decision that must be made on a case-by-case basis. Here are some guidelines that may be of help in reviewing this decision and making such decisions in the future.

In this case, your brother is not only marrying outside the Church to a non-Catholic – and presumably without the appropriate dispensations to do so given his attitude toward the Church – he also sent your parents a letter renouncing the Catholic faith in which they raised him and seeking to proselytize them away from their faith. In such a situation, I believe that the decision of you and your parents not to attend his wedding as a matter of conscience is both understandable and a valid option.

Should your brother protest that his family is “abandoning” him by refusing to attend his wedding, you and your parents may simply say, as kindly and gently as possible, “To the contrary, it is you who have abandoned your family, both your nuclear family and the spiritual family of the Church in which you were raised.”