Is retrouvaille for us?

[smallcat]

My DH and I are struggling right now in our marriage, due to poor communication, his porn addiction and chronic clinical depression (which is fairly well controlled with pharmacotherapy and counseling). We have been in marriage counseling with a Christian counselor for a few months now, but I’m not sure where we’re going-- we seem to be talking a lot about what our feelings are, but not much about how we can make things better.

As miserable as this sounds, we love one another very much and have no thoughts of separation or divorce. Our day-to-day interactions are mostly positive, until it comes to talking about “Us”. Much of our problems are rooted in his depression and my sometimes inappropriate response to it. Is retrouvaille a good option for us? Do they deal with couples who suffer from depression? Is Marriage Encounter a better option? Or just stick with the counseling?

Thanks so much for your help.

 

[tee_eff_em]

My understanding is that Retrouvaille bills itself as for “troubled” marriages, and is particularly geared toward relationships where addiction has been a factor (but I know no more than that).

I would guess a Retrouvaille weekend would be appropriate, but if you want a much more qualified judge, call the local Retrouvaille group, to whom you might explain in a bit more detail, and they will be able to give you a better answer.

:twocents:
tee
(who has experience of Engaged Encounter and Marriage Encounter, but not Retrouvaille)

 

[dhgray]

First of all … W E L C M E!

I’m sorry to hear about your problems. My wife and I went through much of what you are going through. We almost lost it about 7 years ago. Hang in there…please hang in there. Fight for all it’s worth.

Retro, M.E., CFC, Counseling, etc. do what ever it takes. We got help from the Couple for Christ, a Catholic Family ministry.

God bless you,
DHGray

 

[smallcat]

Here’s the other thing I forgot to mention-- I’m Catholic, he’s Protestant (both of us are practicing and faithful). Is retrouvaille sensitive to interfaith marriages?

thanks again.

 

[dhgray]

smallcat:

Here’s the other thing I forgot to mention-- I’m Catholic, he’s Protestant (both of us are practicing and faithful). Is retrouvaille sensitive to interfaith marriages?

thanks again.

I would think so…but please call the Priest.

 

[smallcat]

I guess my question is really-- is retrouvaille only for those considering divorce/separation? I read somewhere (secular magazine) that “Retrouvaille is not for couple whose relationship has lost a little “zing”; rather, it is aimed at those teetering on the brink of divorce.” Well, our relationship has significant problems beyond having “lost its zing”, but we’re nowhere close to the brink of divorce, either. We’re somewhere in between. I don’t want to go to the weekend and be freaked out by all of these couples who are thinking about divorce. I don’t want to make our situation seem more dire than it is.

Any thoughts? I am planning on meeting with the priest.

 

[Mistermerlin]

I would suggest you do go.
Here’s a link retrouvaille.org/

The important thing is that you’ve recognized the need to do something.

God Bless.