Is the blessing of a legal marriage a Sacrament?

[Diem]

Is it acceptable for a practicing Catholic and a Non-Catholic to get married legally and then have the marriage blessed by the Church? Would this be considered a Sacramental marriage? (this is asked with the awareness that the marriage should not be consummated prior to the blessing by the Church)

 

[Brendan]

If the couple are in an ‘irregular’ marriage, that they have publically presented themselves as being married, and have consumated the marriage, but did so outside the Church, then the blessing is called a 'Convalidation;.

What you describe, a civil marriage followed by a Church wedding is actually an ‘honest to goodness’ marriage ceremony.

Both are Sacramental.

The first is to make a non Sacramental ‘marriage’ into a Sacramental one, the second is the establishment of a Sacramental marriage.

Check you with your local priest, he can decribe the differences between a Convalidation and a regular Marriage event in far more detail that anyone can go into on a discussion board .

 

[Diem]

Brendan - thanks for your response. So is a Blessing ceremony a Mass like in a traditional Church wedding? Can the blessing be a small family ceremony? I will follow up with a priest but am curious to know what you might know.

 

[1ke]

Is it acceptable for a practicing Catholic and a Non-Catholic to get married legally and then have the marriage blessed by the Church?

No, it is not acceptable in the US where the priest is both the witness to the Sacrament and the civil authority.

Attempting marriage outside the Catholic form is a violation of Canon Law.

Would this be considered a Sacramental marriage? (this is asked with the awareness that the marriage should not be consummated prior to the blessing by the Church)

A couple who marries outside the Catholic form could approach the church for convalidation, which would make the marriage valid.

I do not understand why a Catholic would seek to marry in such a manner. All Catholics are required to prepare for the Sacrament via the process laid out in their diocese and marry in the Catholic form. Catholics are not free to marry civilly.

 

[1ke]

Brendan - thanks for your response. So is a Blessing ceremony a Mass like in a traditional Church wedding? Can the blessing be a small family ceremony? I will follow up with a priest but am curious to know what you might know.

No it is not a Mass and it is not a wedding ceremony. The couple exchange consent before the priest and two witnesses.

Again, a Catholic couple should wed ONLY in the Catholic form. Marrying civilly and then presuming to “fixing” it later is a bad idea and purposely violating Church law is a sin.

 

[puzzleannie]

Brendan - thanks for your response. So is a Blessing ceremony a Mass like in a traditional Church wedding? Can the blessing be a small family ceremony? I will follow up with a priest but am curious to know what you might know.

no there is no blessing ceremony. there is a convalidation which is the rite of the sacrament of matrimony. it can be as small or grand as you wish, but most people, since they have already presented themselves as married due their their civil ceremony, prefer something quieter. Call the priest to arrange for marriage preparation, which will be tailored to you circumstances. for instance instead of Engaged Encounter, in this diocese we host convalidation conferences for these couples.

if both parties are baptized this is sacramental, if one party is not Catholic, the Catholic party must obtain the proper dispensations to marry a non-Catholic.

in Mexico and some European countries where clergy do not have civil authority to witness marriages, it may indeed be the accepted custom to have the civil procedure first, followed as soon as possible by the Church wedding, but with the understanding that the couple will not live as man and wife until the latter occurs.

 

[Phemie]

in Mexico and some European countries where clergy do not have civil authority to witness marriages, it may indeed be the accepted custom to have the civil procedure first, followed as soon as possible by the Church wedding, but with the understanding that the couple will not live as man and wife until the latter occurs.

It’s not only accepted custom but in France and Germany it is the law that they marry City Hall first. The Church will insist on seeing the marriage certificate before it marries them. I seem to recall reading a canon that said that the Catholic who marries at city hall in countries where that is the law commits no offence but I can’t seem to find it.

 

[Joe_Kelley]

In our diocese one must wait at least 12 months after a civil marriage before one may request a convalidation.

 

[Diem]

It’s not only accepted custom but in France and Germany it is the law that they marry City Hall first. The Church will insist on seeing the marriage certificate before it marries them. I seem to recall reading a canon that said that the Catholic who marries at city hall in countries where that is the law commits no offence but I can’t seem to find it.

Thanks, I will check into this.

 

[Diem]

I do not understand why a Catholic would seek to marry in such a manner…

Well…it’s complicated. The Catholic in this case would rather wed traditionally, but is curious as to whether there are other acceptable ways and will not marry outside of the Churches precepts.

 

[1ke]

Well…it’s complicated. The Catholic in this case would rather wed traditionally, but is curious as to whether there are other acceptable ways and will not marry outside of the Churches precepts.

If you do not want to marry outside the Church’s precepts then do not pursue the course you outlined in your original post.

Instead, contact your parish priest, begin the marriage preparation process, and wed in the Catholic form.

 

[tassitus]

Well…it’s complicated. The Catholic in this case would rather wed traditionally, but is curious as to whether there are other acceptable ways and will not marry outside of the Churches precepts.

I would advise the Catholic party to either go ahead with a Catholic ceremony, or early on check into getting what is known as a dispensation from form (i.e., a dispensation from observing the Catholic form of marriage). If a dispensation is granted (from his/her bishop I believe), then a later marriage “blessing” (really a convalidation) would not be required.

As a Catholic who DID NOT get a dispensation to marry outside the Church (fallen away at the time and could not have cared less, now deep into the consequences of this arrangement), well… let’s just say that I would no recommend it.

In peace.

 

[benedictgal]

It’s not only accepted custom but in France and Germany it is the law that they marry City Hall first. The Church will insist on seeing the marriage certificate before it marries them. I seem to recall reading a canon that said that the Catholic who marries at city hall in countries where that is the law commits no offence but I can’t seem to find it.

The same also holds true in Mexico. It’s an unfortunate vestige from that country’s anti-clierical days. Oddly enough, we had a couple from Mexico (both US residents) marry at the Cathedral and then, they had a state judge waiting at the banquet hall (with the marriage license). My rector pitched a fit and had me retrieve the license from the judge. Apparently, the couple forget that in the United States, the priest is recognized as the official party conducting the ceremony and can sign the marriage license.

Luckily, the judge was nice enough to give me the license. He, too, thought it was weird. He did get his bench fee, though, without having to do anything.

 

[duskyjewel]

Well…it’s complicated. The Catholic in this case would rather wed traditionally, but is curious as to whether there are other acceptable ways and will not marry outside of the Churches precepts.

The Catholic in this situation should grow a backbone! And this comes from the other half of the relationship… the person who got told there would be no wedding if it were not in the Church. My husband wanted to be with me more than anything in the world… EXCEPT his good standing as a Catholic. I was a fallen-away Catholic at the time, so I did not have to deal with conversion or anything like that… but for many people, returning to a faith they have abandoned is almost as much work.

If being Catholic and marrying in the Church is important to you, then DO NOT try to find loopholes or ways around the rules. You will regret it in the end. Just do it right from the beginning. If you tell the person you want to marry that you will only marry in the Church, and they refuse, well, then, you have found out that the person is not a good match for you… haven’t you?

 

[Diem]

The Catholic in this situation should grow a backbone! And this comes from the other half of the relationship… the person who got told there would be no wedding if it were not in the Church. My husband wanted to be with me more than anything in the world… EXCEPT his good standing as a Catholic. I was a fallen-away Catholic at the time, so I did not have to deal with conversion or anything like that… but for many people, returning to a faith they have abandoned is almost as much work.

If being Catholic and marrying in the Church is important to you, then DO NOT try to find loopholes or ways around the rules. You will regret it in the end. Just do it right from the beginning. If you tell the person you want to marry that you will only marry in the Church, and they refuse, well, then, you have found out that the person is not a good match for you… haven’t you?

Thanks - he knows and though he is not a Catholic would marry her in the Church if they were allowed the dispensation- they aren’t trying to find ways around the rules … just wondering if there were other options allowed by the Church and since this is an international forum…just thought to ask.

 

[puzzleannie]

Thanks - he knows and though he is not a Catholic would marry her in the Church if they were allowed the dispensation- they aren’t trying to find ways around the rules … just wondering if there were other options allowed by the Church and since this is an international forum…just thought to ask.

there is not possible way to give an “international” answer that is true in all jurisdictions. the couple must still begin the process by approaching the pastor of the Catholic party, explaining their circumstances, and following his guidance. the canon law binding Catholics regarding marriage is the same everywhere, but its application varies by diocese according to the circumstances pertaining in that area.