Is there a Catholic View on Appropriate Childhood Discipline?

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DENNYINMI

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With a heavy heart I write this and ask this question sincerely.

I am raising my 4 year old Grand-son due to my daughters incapability at this time. I have placed my daughters’ needs at the foot of the cross, with my own, for grace and endurance during this time.

My question is…and now I think I understand what is meant by Gods’ “strange work”…is it appropriate at times, when a Child is not listening to a corrective measure verbally, to spank?

NO, I am not talking about a beating here folks, what I am talking about is a spank on the toosh?

Quite frankly I did not do this with my own, and really wonder if I should have. Being 52, I received a lichen or two in my youth and survived…also survived to respect my parents.

What is the thought on appropriate rearing?

Thank you
 
No, the Church does not have a position on this and you will find opinions on both ends of the spectrum and everywhere in between.

I do suggest Dr. Ray’s books (Dr. Ray Guarendi). See his website:

drray.com/
 
If I could make any suggestion and only one suggestion, it’s this. Never bring up religion as a method of conviction when disciplining the child. If you do then the child will desire to distance himself from those convictions and revile against them. God convicts us in the context of inspiration, not punishment. It IS good, however, to give the child an objective sense of right and wrong, that is true with or without envoking religion. The child does need to know how to behave in an appropriate manner, and if you withhold punishment for bad behavior, then you may be doing him more harm than good. I hear alot of people condemn spanking as some form of primitive punishment, but children who are spanked I notice tend to be more respectful and have a better sense of right and wrong as they get older. Just remember there is a difference between “spanking” your child and “beating” you child (which I’m sure you’d never condone.) If you are to spank him, it should be done with a stern, disciplining manner, not out of angry convulsion. Also, it shouldn’t be too accessive, only when absolutely necessary. Be certain he knows you’re serious about it, too. If you say something, follow through with it, this sets an example for him. Don’t make idol or exagerated threats, either. And ultimately, be his friend. Let him know that even though he can be bad sometimes, it doesn’t affect how you feel towards him.
Btw, I got some lickings in my childhood too, and I think I turned out alright. 👍
 
DENNYINMI said:
With a heavy heart I write this and ask this question sincerely.

I am raising my 4 year old Grand-son due to my daughters incapability at this time. I have placed my daughters’ needs at the foot of the cross, with my own, for grace and endurance during this time.

My question is…and now I think I understand what is meant by Gods’ “strange work”…is it appropriate at times, when a Child is not listening to a corrective measure verbally, to spank?

NO, I am not talking about a beating here folks, what I am talking about is a spank on the toosh?

Quite frankly I did not do this with my own, and really wonder if I should have. Being 52, I received a lichen or two in my youth and survived…also survived to respect my parents.

What is the thought on appropriate rearing?

Thank you
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I am an educator.
Let the kid be free when he is young.
But when you say Yes it is Yes.
When you say No it is No. Learning to accept the NO as an answer is the best thing you can do to your grandson. He will learn resilience, which the educators value most in kids.
But:
Yes for the Good.
No for the Bad.
Nowadays there is much confusion. Yes for Bad and No for Good are common practices.
Simple, no?
Better said than done…but someone has got to do it…
 
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