Is there a point in trying to help someone that doesn't want to be helped?

[q54332]

My grandpa on my father’s side used to be Catholic (cafeteria Catholic that is) then went church to church until he just became a nondenominational Christian, he has been with us for a lot of time this week and today my parents (and I, mainly listening but sometimes showing my parent’s verse or something else) got into their second debate with him, they kept showing him verses that showed that Jesus did find a Church (Matt. 16:18), we showed him verses about sprinkling water instead of fully submerging baptisms (Ez. 36:25), and more about a wide array of issues. The main problem is that he can’t stay on topic, we might be talking about the early church and he will jump and start talking about the ten commandments, we might be talking about how the Catholic church is the first church and he will say that it was the pentecostal church because it’s mentioned in the bible (even though he doesn’t associate with that church) and more. Is it even worth it for my parents to even try to open his eyes? My dad really wants to try to make his father come back to Catholicism so that’s mainly how it starts but I don’t know. What do y’all think?

 

[0Scarlett_nidiyilii]

I’m general, present your case.
If the person is interested, let them lead the conversation.
If they’re not interested, give it a rest.
In the meantime, love them, relate to them, and pray

 

[Jbrady]

What do y’all think?

I agree with Scarlett. Give it a rest.

I would never bring up the topic with him again and find more pleasant and productive things to talk about, like pleasant memories from the past, etc. It’s not a pleasant experience being badgered, browbeaten, grilled and ganged up on, and that’s the impression I get what your father is unintentionally doing. It’s more likely to turn someone off to the faith than to convert them. I’ve been turned off by many a preacher myself, and I’m sure you have, too.

I would say that the best way to bring someone to the faith is to lead by example rather than preaching, debating or arguing. Like Scarlett said, love them and pray for them. And trust in the Holy Spirit to do His work.

 

[Margaret_Ann]

If he’s still at your house and have some blessed Green Scapulars, hide one in his bedroom, one in the kitchen, living room (wherever he is the most) and pray the Green Scapular prayer: “Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us now and at the hour of our death.” for his conversion. Our Lady will intercede for him. Hope that helps.

 

[HomeschoolDad]

I have found that a lot of people of that generation tend to be very cynical about religion — perhaps they lived through a time when scandals were not disclosed, and now that all of this is breaking loose, they lose faith in any of it. I have also heard of people who were put off, or even traumatized, by childhood experience of having religion “rammed down their throat”, or of having to memorize and give external assent to things they’d never really believed in. The older generations also tend to be very concerned about propriety, orderliness, “not doing anything that is too far out of the ordinary”, and thus they are utterly unequipped to deal with a Gospel that has become counter-cultural — “times have changed and we just have to go along with it, I’m too old and I don’t feel like fighting”.

These are generalizations, to be sure, but they do bear out. I’ve seen too many examples of it among those of much older generations.

 

[q54332]

You might be right

 

[otjm]

Is it even worth it for my parents to even try to open his eyes?

I was taught many decades ago that young children do not tell their parents what to do.

In this matter, it is not your business to tell you parents how to react to your grandfather’s religious status.

Your parents may not be taking the correct approach to your grandfather, but that is not your problem; it is theirs, and considering that your parents are no longer children, but are adults, their concern and their approach in how to deal with it is theirs, not yours.

Is it worth it? Either the Catholic Church is the Church Christ founded, or Church members are all liars; and history shows it to be the Church Christ founded. That, in itself, makes their concerns over your grandfather have meaning. They are concerned about your grandfather’s salvation; I would suggest that you might also be concerned about it.

And that concern should be carried out in prayer for your grandfather. Beyond that, it is not your issue; it is theirs.

If your parents were to ask me, I might advise them on a different approach (I am likely about as old as your grandfather), but they are not asking me - just as they are not asking you.

I would suggest that you pray - for your grandfather’s conversion of heart and mind; and in thanks to God for having parents who care enough to try.

Then tend to your studies.

 

[q54332]

I don’t know how your parents are but in my family, we are pretty open with each other, my parents are really open and always tell me what’s going on. I’m not inserting myself into the situation, my family is just very open, you don’t need to worry about me telling my parents what they have to do. In your family it might be your parent’s issue and they don’t want you involved but my parents are different, they actually are the ones that brought me into the conversation. So that last part isn’t correct in this case that they are not asking me. But you are right, I definitely see why my father really wants to convert his father into the Church Christ founded. Hopefully, God can open his eyes, I will definitely pray for him.