Is there a spiritual ego?

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In_Jesus_I_Trust

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I Dont know how to trully express it.
Last days i was really concentrating on becoming holier and I was Reading stories about other saints.I trully feel His presence almost every minute of last few days.(Usually i feel it,but not that strong and not all the time.)And yesterday at evening there was a spiritual renewal.There were a lot of People like Always.I was exciting about it a lot…And there were a lot of young people who were praying and singing praise.And i feel like God loves them more than me…I know it is wrong,Like its Satan voice in my head.I was really fighting it and praying to God to change my view into love for them,so I can trully love them.I do not want to feel jealous.For real i didnt want,but cant say i wasnt feel that,i was fighting that feeling and Pray so Lord can give me full love for them because i really want that.So i dont want to think I am holier than them,or God loves them more than me…I want to be humble and Love others as me.So I Dont know did i commit any sin,i was really fighting that feeling and want to love them.I didnt hate them to be clear,just a little bit sad, dissapointed or even jealous because God loves them more than me…Is this sin or my spiritual ego?
 
Thank you so much,this kind of temptations are worse than others,because it includes Pride and to think you are something that you know you arent.Enemy is busy for sure.Thanks for sending this prayer,God bless
 
Litany of Humility

O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.
From the desire of being esteemed,
Deliver me, Jesus.
From the desire of being loved…
From the desire of being extolled …
From the desire of being honored …
From the desire of being praised …
From the desire of being preferred to others…
From the desire of being consulted …
From the desire of being approved …
From the fear of being humiliated …
From the fear of being despised…
From the fear of suffering rebukes …
From the fear of being calumniated …
From the fear of being forgotten …
From the fear of being ridiculed …
From the fear of being wronged …
From the fear of being suspected …

That others may be loved more than I,
Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That others may be esteemed more than I …
That, in the opinion of the world,
others may increase and I may decrease …
That others may be chosen and I set aside …
That others may be praised and I unnoticed …
That others may be preferred to me in everything…
That others may become holier than I, provided that I may become as holy as I should…

Amen
 
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Sometimes we get very silly thoughts and they come seemingly out of nowhere.
Sometimes we get temptations and discouragemenrs.
Best to just ignore these ideas, because God is infinite and has plenty of love to go around
 
In_Jesus_I_Trust said:
There were a lot of People like Always.I was exciting about it a lot…And there were a lot of young people who were praying and singing praise.And i feel like God loves them more than me
Click to expand...
In_Jesus_I_Trust said:
Last days i was really concentrating on becoming holier and I was Reading stories about other saints.I trully feel His presence almost every minute of last few days
Click to expand...
No you’re doing great. Better to pray to God in private than in public

Matthew 6
5
When you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, who love to stand and pray in the synagogues and on street corners so that others may see them. Amen, I say to you, they have received their reward.
6
But when you pray, go to your inner room, close the door, and pray to your Father in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will repay you.
 
Well,it is really hard to explain That feel.
You know when you hug the person you love the most(Mom,child…),and the feeling of comfort and love.But its 1000x better and stronger.Really cant describe.Peace,comfort,Huge love and warm,really warm feel.I feel it just few times,sometimes stronger and sometimes lighter.Hard to explain
 
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