Is this the sin of detraction?

  • Thread starter Thread starter Larquetta
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
L

Larquetta

Guest
Recently I mentioned to a friend that someone we both know can be passive aggressive sometimes. I know that revealing someone’s faults is sinful but I’m not sure if this is serious enough to be a mortal sin.
 
Considering the three conditions (CCC 1857) for a sin to be mortal – grave matter, full knowledge, and deliberate consent – it would appear that it is not a mortal sin in this instance. God bless you!
 
Last edited:
By coincidence I found this! Post 9.
40.png
Sin of Detraction Moral Theology
The Catechism of the Catholic Church has this wording: 2477 Respect for the reputation of persons forbids every attitude and word likely to cause them unjust injury. He becomes guilty: –of rash judgment who, even tacitly, assumes as true, without sufficient foundation, the moral fault of a neighbor; –of detraction who, without objectively valid reason, discloses another’s faults and failings to persons who did not know them; –of calumny who, by remarks contrary to the truth, harms the …
Click to expand...
😲
 
Personally I do not see a problem. You did not volunteer your opinion but were asked. If your opinion is sincere and has a basis on past experience it is valid. I might have avoided being that specific but that’s just me.
 
I wasn’t exactly asked for my opinion. The girl who I called passive aggressive has been unpopular among some people in my school and my friend said she wondered if the other girl had always been unpopular, so I offered an explanation for why she is not well liked.
 
To clarify the situation, I understood that detraction is a mortal sin; however, the Catechism mentions that it isn’t a mortal sin in cases when the subject matter isn’t serious. At the time I didn’t think it to be serious; now, I am not sure.
 
Here is how I determine if it is serious enough to be sinful. How would I feel if the person overheard me saying it? Would they be hurt? If it would hurt another person, I would take keep it to myself and if I did say it, I’d take it to Confession.
 
The deeper question is if you really know what it means to be passive aggressive. Does the person you said this to know what passive aggressive means? that is, to know what you really mean? Are you qualified to say that someone is p-a?

Believe me when I say that I don’t keep my mouth shut as much as I should and say things that I shouldn’t. Yes, I think it is the sin of detraction.
 
We have to be very careful how we communicate .

"The tongue is a fire. It is full of wrong. It poisons the whole body. The tongue sets our whole lives on fire with a fire that comes from hell . " (James 3:6) .

The sins we commit by means of our communication , by written or spoken word , need to be given more attention than they are .

@Larquetta , if you are in doubt speak of it in Confession to obtain peace of mind and guidance .
 
Sometimes there’s a real fine line between sharing information so another person can understand a third party and indulging in gossip.
I mean, it’s not like you accused this girl of kicking puppies and liking it.
But OTOH, I wouldn’t like it if I found out that folks were discussing my standing on the popularity food chain and then speculating on what my problems were. Especially because it’s a social situation (as opposed to a work situation where other people actually need to know about me).
 
A good way to keep out of trouble is to try to talk more about things like places, objects or ideas and less about people. Talking about people is safer if what you are saying is positive (of course be truthful here too). Another good idea is if you must discuss something negative (I mean have a valid reason) include something good as well. It helps keep the conversation from degenerating into a gripe session and helps prevent your from developing a negative attitude towards the person…
 
Larquetta said:
Recently I mentioned to a friend that someone we both know can be passive aggressive sometimes.
Click to expand...
Passive aggressive is a personality style, not a moral fault. It is a way of interacting with other people that sometimes interferes with relationships. Most passive aggressive people do not realize they use this style, and are more likely to recover from it when it is brought to the surface by those who know and care about them. On the contrary, you and your friend, if you recognize this pattern, are more likely to be able to be helpful when you see it operating.

Iron sharpens iron, and one person sharpens the wits of another. Proverbs 27:17

We can all help one another grow, if we can offer feedback to each other about our behaviors and interactive style. As a person who has suffered this condition in the past, I can honestly say that I would not have recovered if people had not pointed out to me when I was acting in a passive aggressive manner. As a result of those who cared, I have learned to express anger more directly.

Follow what the Scripture tells us.

Matthew 18:15
15 “If another member of the church sins against you, go and point out the fault when the two of you are alone. If the member listens to you, you have regained that one.

I am not speaking of “sin” as a moral fault, because usually this is a learned interaction style, but “sin” in the sense that it falls short of the target and has the potential to hurt others.
 
Thanks for the advice! I agree that I should think more before I speak and not speak poorly of others. I tend to be very scrupulous, however, so I’m not sure if the “when in doubt, go to Confession” advice works for me. That’s why I am unsure of what to do.
 
Last edited:
I don’t recall the exact book/chapter/verse but the Bible cautions seriously about what we say. I think that Christ said we will answer for everything we say. That should make us all pause. Doesn’t Paul say that we are ambassadors for Christ? – that’s 24/7/365 I would think.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top