It's finally done!

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Lexee15

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Well, the petition for dissolution of marriage will be filed tomorrow :o . I finally did it, I’m nervous, not sure what will happen from here on out…my attorney said this could take up to a year considering I’m pregnant…I just don’t want it to get messy, but if I have to play hardball I will. Thanks for all your prayers…now I ask for prayers again to get me through this and so that everything turns out for the best, thanks.
 
I don’t know whether to say I’m sorry or I’m glad. Maybe both. I’m sorry that your dream died, but I’m glad for your sanity and the children’s emotional health.
 
Its not the end of the world but you will most likely think so at times.

I was married 18 years and 3 months. :bigyikes: and just recently found out what true love really is at age 39, I am now 40 ,engaged :angel1: :amen:
and also truely believe by how we met and got together it was an act of God his son and the holy spirit. But I wont bore you with the details unless you really want to know,But relize this is what actually proved to me there is a God,his son, and a holy spirit…
Code: 
may God be with you

                       John
 
You will continue to be in our prayers. I think you have shown great courage, maturity and focus to take this step at what must be a very difficult time. I hope this can be settled in a manner that brings you some measure of peace.
 
You all are in my prayers. Keep in good spirits, especially for the baby’s sake.
 
Thanks everyone, for your prayers…I know they will help me greatly. I just feel terrible now, not because this is ending but because I’m going to be a “divorced” woman. I never pictured myself in this situation, I feel like a failure. I know this wasn’t my fault, but that doesn’t keep me from feeling like a failure. I feel like I’m marked somehow…like everyone will know that my marriage failed. If I didn’t have children no one would ever have to know, but with children no one will be able to tell if I was married…did things the right way, or if I’m just some crazy girl who was sleeping around and got caught by getting pregnant…I know that the stigma that accompanied divorced women isn’t the same today…it’s much more acceptable, but it’s not acceptable to me!!! I’m embarrased and ashamed…I don’t know how to shake this feeling. I’m not used to seeing divorces in my family…there are very few…the ones there are have been among the cousins, but not among the aunts and uncles, etc. Maybe I’m just being overly sensitive…I don’t know.
 
I firmly believe that you can project how you expect people to treat you. If you are confident, self-assured, dignified and strong people will tend to treat you with respect and even deference. If you walk around like a beaten pup, with your head hanging as low as your self-confidence, people will likewise sense your insecurity and vulnerability. It doesn’t mean you always have to put on an act–but when you’re out in public keep your chin up, literally. You have done nothing to cause this divorce–but you are doing everything in your power to give your children the most stable and secure environment you can with the cards you have been dealt. That is something to be admired, not ashamed of.
 
I will say a prayer for you Lexee15 and for your children. This is certainly not an easy time, so lean on God and pray without ceasing. Know that there are people on here at all times of day to say hi to, and to pray for you.
 
Well, I recieved a copy of the divorce papers in the mail today along with the letter that was sent to him…I am assuming he got the papers either yesterday or today. Who knows if he’s even opened the mail yet…he ignores it usually. He did call and left a message this afternoon wanting to know how the baby was and that he missed him alot…isn’t that rich…he hasn’t laid eyes on our son since Dec. 27th and hasn’t asked about him until now… please :banghead: . It took three weeks for him to miss him, my baby still isn’t feeling well, has lost weight and is not his happy self, I’m tired and becoming frustrated and impatient with my son…it’s terrible I know, but this is why there needs to be two parents around, to share the easy and hard times. It just irritates me even more to know that all he served as is a sperm donor :whacky: !!! I don’t think he really wanted to know about the baby…he was just looking for a way to talk to me because of those papers if he did get them. I can’t believe I married a snake :banghead: :crying: !!!
 
Lexee, you can still wear your wedding rings if you feel “stigmatized” without them.

I gained enough weight with my last baby, that my wedding rings didn’t fit. I felt like everyone was looking at me (they weren’t) so I got a cheap silver ring to wear while I tried to loose the extra pounds. (I ended up getting the rings resized, I figured after a year, the extra finger size was here to stay, lol.)

As for your soon to be ex, limit contact, try to keep it between the lawers. If he knows you have an emotional side, he might try and use it to keep you flustered during the divorce proceedings. My dad would snoop around my mom, especially before court dates, or special days, like anniversarys, holidays, and birthdays and get her so upset, that she was not in any shape to press for what was rightfully hers. My dad got away with so much, b/c she didn’t have the emotional energy to fight him for it in court. Don’t let him do that to you.

Remember, you will not be fighting so much for what is “rightfully yours”, but for what you need for your kids. Keep your thoughts centered around the kids needs (it makes it easier, so you don’t feel like your being a selfish b***h. You’re not, trust me, it might just feel that way if things get dirty.)

Be tough!
 
Lexee I will be praying for you in this difficult time. God will get you through. Just go one day at a time.🙂
 
God bless you, Lexee. Please know that you are in our prayers. I wish I could jump through the computer and give you a great big {{{{ HUG! }}}}}
 
Congratulations Lexee,

You are in my prayers. My 16 year marriage was recently finalized. My only advise to you is to listen to what your lawyer says, and trust only that your ex will do what ever he can to protect his selfish interests regardless of what is good for his children.

I for one think you did the right thing.
 
I’ll say congratulations too. I’ve read some of your previous posts and definitely think you are doing the right thing. I know it isn’t easy, but it is the right thing.
 
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