Job not going to work out. Feel depressed. Family mad at me. Please Pray

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HopingforGodtohelp

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For the past 5 or so years, I’ve had the dream of being an investment banker. I thought this was the way I could best glorify God. I’m not particularly good at most things, I’m kind of a mess, I’m bad with people and a lot of people hate me. I’m not sure if I’ll ever get a wife because I don’t think I’m good looking enough. The only thing I thought I was good at was finance, and I wanted to make a ton of money and give it away to those in need as my way of achieving God’s plan. But it looks like that’s not going to work out as most of these jobs have filled up, and if you don’t get an internship, you don’t have a job. Now, I’ve fallen into a complete depression and just bawled my eyes out, and my parents got furious with me because of this because I was crying too loud, and that just made me even sadder and cry more, so I had to go hide in a different spot in my house. Now I feel like I’ve dishonored my mother and father and I don’t have any way to perform good works to help people. I’m just depressed. I don’t really have a specific ask, but if anyone wanted to recommend a bible verse to read which could make me feel better, that would be wonderful, prayers are always nice too
 
Could you see a medical professional about your depression. You sound like you are not yet an adult? Do you have a plan, schooling and then university level education. With education you can become a finance employee.

We are Catholics. People in the secular world don’t like a lot of our ways, look at the example of Jesus, he was mocked and ridiculed, this did not stop him.

There are plenty of ways to perform good works to help people, why not volunteer at St Vincent de Paul, or something similar. Start there. Take small steps.
 
If you can get to an open church, spend some time praying before Jesus in the blessed sacrament. God has a plan for your life and wants you to be happy. Of course total happiness is only in heaven. What is God’s dream for you? Open your heart to new horizons, new adventures and discover your gifts. Mary, our mother, understands your trial and pain…run to her. Also read some holy, sacred Scripture and seek His peace. Prayers for you.
 
One’s vocation can be predetermined, by will or coincidence. Trial and error is how you find out.

My thoughts and prays will be with you today.
 
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Investment banking is very stressful. You would probably be best suited to another job. Perhaps your parents, relations, or friends have some job leads–you never know what’s going to pay off!
 
Also, if you perceive that lots of people hate you, you either need some tutoring on basic social skills or a therapist who can help you get out of your pattern of negative thinking. Most jobs need some degree of “people skills.”
 
Have you sat down and talked to a mentor in the filed of finance? We have many finance professionals at our parish, ask your pastor if you have any in your parish. Take them for coffee and ask questions.

What education have you pursued? Do you have a degree in Finance or Business?

What practical steps are you taking to become a professional in the Financial community?
 
Remember that God’s plan may not be your plan. I’ve had four different careers in my life. When one didn’t work out, I tried something else. I was open to trying different paths and not just for what my degree was in.
Try finding a mentor that can help you with how you present yourself to people, especially during interviews.
I have a step-nephew that has a degree in finance and ended up joining the Navy. He actually works as a finance officer. He also was socially awkward, but the Navy developed his skills and he is now married, a father and on a career track.
Be open minded, pray and doors will open.
 
Also, you don’t need a “ton of money” in order to be able to glorify God by your works of charity. It can be as simple as upping your Sunday offering amount by the cost of a daily cup of coffee, or buying the next person in line at McDonald’s a cup of coffee, or buying a cup of coffee and a breakfast sandwich for the homeless person you pass by.

Open yourself up to experiences. Keep searching for a job in your chosen field, not because you want to get rich (no matter how noble your reasons are) but because you like it and you’re good at it. And if another job opportunity presents itself, take it and see if you can find your niche there. Do the best you can, no matter where you find yourself. Doors can open at any time. Don’t feel you failed because your “dream job” didn’t work out. It might not have worked out YET. Give yourself time to grow.
 
There’s a lot to unpack here.

First, if you suffer from depression, you need help from a qualified mental health professional. If you are in college, many campuses offer such services to their students.

It sounds like you are still in college, since you are looking for financial internships. I also suggest you work with your academic adviser at your university for assistance with internship placement.

You say you want to be an investment banker to make lots of money to give away. That’s not necessarily the best reason to become an investment banker-- or any profession. First and foremost, you need to look at what you have passion for. If you take a job for the wrong reasons, you will find yourself pretty miserable.

Also, you say you have no way to perform good works to help people unless you make a lot of money as an investment banker. Not only is this short sighted, it is totally untrue. God takes us just as we are and all we are called to do is give our time, talent, and treasure in whatever measure we have it. Everyone has talents, charisms. Everyone has time. Everyone has money-- but it doesn’t have to be riches. It can be $5 if that’s what you have. Remember how pleased God was with the widow’s mite.

Most investment bankers work 80+ hours a week. It’s a cutthroat business. Perhaps it’s not a fit for you, and if you became one you wouldn’t have the time to give to worthy causes. Money isn’t everything. And many times its a hindrance rather than a help.

Go talk to your counselor at school, or ask your parents for help finding a therapist. Because depression and despondency (all the crying) point to some deeper issues.
 
Even though the investment banker job is something you want, it is possible that God has even something better planned for you. A bible verse for you: Proverbs 3:5 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;”
 
You really don’t give enough information about yourself. Why do you want to be an investment banker? All you’ve said is you want to make lots of money to help the poor. A lot of other professions have even higher wages. Is it just that you want to be seen as helpful?

You can help people in many ways. If, as most here think, you are very Young, you should look into education. I can assure you, no one ever became an ‘investment banker’ by filling out an application! Your education should be designed around what your goals…person, professional, financial, and all.
 
I just read your post OP and from what I can tell, your just undergoing a lot of stress and need to clear your mind a bit. I’m going start by giving you some actionable advice:

-Join a Toastmaster’s Club close to you- Toastmasters is the biggest public speaking organization in the world and I can assure you if you join a club and attend meetings and give speeches, your confidence and people/social skills will improve dramatically in 6 months

-Get a good workout routine- You say you don’t think you are attractive and I have no idea how you look or why you think that is, so if you’re trying your improve your appearance I would advise you to go to the gym more. If you want to improve muscle mass, focus on compound lifts (Benchpress, Squat, Deadlift, and Powercleans, and a few good dumbbell exercises) These are really the only exercises you need for huge improvements. If you need to lose weight, start reducing your carb intake and shoot for running 4-5 miles a day.

As far as being an investment banker is concerned, you still have plenty of time to keep trying to be one, and there are numerous other routes you can take in the Finance world to still build yourself a good career if you’re good at it. I’m guessing you’re in a better place in life than you think you are.

Also, I can’t think of a good Bible quote to give you at the moment, though I highly recommend reading through the book of Ecclesiastes. Trust me on this one.

You’ll be in my prayers as well.

Alyosha
 
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AlyoshaKaramazov said:
-Join a Toastmaster’s Club close to you- Toastmasters is the biggest public speaking organization in the world and I can assure you if you join a club and attend meetings and give speeches, your confidence and people/social skills will improve dramatically in 6 months
Click to expand...
THIS. I have suggested Toastmasters in the past. Great org!
 
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