K of C question...and advice please?

[Seeks_God]

So, last September I joined the Knights of Columbus and was “gung-ho” at first. I made several promises to get involved with various activities, but my work schedule, family commitments and such prevented me from getting involved. When I joined, I was under the impression that I would be mentored but there has been no mentoring and really feel like I don’t know what I’m doing there. I haven’t been to a council meeting in several months but want a sense of belonging to the organization.

On the same token, my wife and I went through a little struggle for a few months due to her work and my work not coinciding with any type of life that would involve commitments to family and church. We’ve made some changes and are begining to attend masses again, but I still feel rather “unwanted” (Do I sound like I’m bawling like a baby?..lol) at the Knights.

What would any of you suggest I do?

SG

 

[SuscipeMeDomine]

I usually find it helpful to be direct in asking for what I need. In this situation I would call one of the officers and ask if there was someone who could help me get acquainted and become active.

 

[mlldrl]

I’m an officer in my council and I’m still pretty new to the Knights. I can relate to feeling a little bit lost…much of the time I have no clue what the senior Knights are talking about. But here’s the deal. You can get out of the Knights as much as you want or are willing to put in to the organization. If you want to get more involved then reach out and find a way to do so. We always have little things going on that we need volunteers for in addition to the big events. I know lots of guys who can’t regularly attend the meetings but they show up for the events to help out. Sure we’d like to see more of them but they pull their weight when we needed them to and that’s the important thing. While fellowship is part the KofC it isn’t our primary focus. Remember, we’re a Catholic service organization. Stay faithful, attend the meetings when you can, reach out to the Grand Knight. I’m confident that in time it will all become old hat for me and maybe then I can mentor one of the new guys.

Have you taken your second and third yet?

M

 

[mercygate]

So, last September I joined the Knights of Columbus and was “gung-ho” at first. I made several promises to get involved with various activities, but my work schedule, family commitments and such prevented me from getting involved. When I joined, I was under the impression that I would be mentored but there has been no mentoring and really feel like I don’t know what I’m doing there.** I haven’t been to a council meeting in several months but want a sense of belonging to the organization. **

It’s hard to have a sense of belonging if you’re not actually “belonging”.

On the same token, my wife and I went through a little struggle for a few months due to her work and my work not coinciding with any type of life that would involve commitments to family and church. We’ve made some changes and are begining to attend masses again, but I still feel rather “unwanted” (Do I sound like I’m bawling like a baby?..lol) at the Knights.

Yes, you sound like your are whining a little, but it’s allowed in moderation.

One thing at a time. You NEED to get things in order with your family, your work, and with going to Mass TOGETHER on Sundays (every Sunday) before you plug in with other stuff.

Now, if your needful things are in order, you can get out to the Council meetings a couple of times a month and gradually figure out where you fit in with projects. But be CAREFUL. If your council is anything like my DH’s, it will be way too easy to over-commit yourself . . . Don’t say yes to more than one thing at a time. Go to the dinners before you get tapped to cook or serve them. That’s a great way to get to know people while supporting the charitable end of things – and to include your wife as well.

I commend your interest in the Knights. They offer a broad spectrum of charitable activities that men of widely diverse abilities, professional, social and intellectual levels can do for the benefit of the Church and community. They’re a fabulous organization that uses ordinary guys to achieve extraordinary things. And God knows, men NEED good men friends!

 

[Seeks_God]

Have you taken your second and third yet?M

No, not yet…I’m still first.

I like your advice, however and suppose I should be a little Nike-like and “just do it”.

Thanks!

SG

 

[mercygate]

No, not yet…I’m still first.

I like your advice, however and suppose I should be a little Nike-like and “just do it”.

Thanks!

SG

DH has been 3rd for 3 years. He goes for his 4th is a couple of weeks. All the guys say (in that I-can’t-tell-you-anything way they have) that taking the 4th is a profoundly moving experience and that it really means a lot to them.

DH was pretty good with going Third. It means a lot to him, and so do all the guys. GREAT guys!

 

[mlldrl]

I like your advice, however and suppose I should be a little Nike-like and “just do it”.

Thanks!

SG

Yep. You won’t get any playing time if you’re sitting in the stands.

M

 

[nerddad]

just walk in the kitchen and pick up a towel…maybe i’m a little forward, but it worked for me.

it’s important to attend meetings. The committees are set up and the committee leaders ask for people to help at the meetings.

 

[jkatpc]

I know exactly how you feel. I’ve been a 4th degree for several years now. When I first joined, I was about 40 years old and clearly one of they youngest people in the council. Most of the older members (some had actually been knights in that council longer than I’d been alive) were kind of cliquish. But, I got talking to them and found a treasure trove of information and wisdom–what it was like being in WWII, keeping a family together, raising kids, etc. They didn’t make the first move; I did. Being kind of introverted, that wasn’t easy but it was worth it.

Unfortunately, many councils don’t have a good “transitioning” program for new members. Emphasis is heavy on recruiting, but not on the “what’s next?”. The result is a lot of people who never go beyond their first or second degree.