Lay Religious Vocations

[hamburglar]

I am currently a sophomore in college, studying theology and philosophy. I have been discerning the Priesthood for around 3 years. I have somewhat recently started dating a young lady, and I am continuing to discern whether God is calling me to the married life or to the priesthood.

I had been fairly certain that God is calling me to the Priesthood until I met this girl and began to discern whether married life is what I am called to. I now see marriage as a possible vocation for me.

Here’s the problem: I desire to do work in the church. However, it seems that the areas in the Church I am drawn toward are reserved to the Priesthood. I recognize the importance of priests and do not want to take over any roles.

So my question is: What is a possible vocation in the Church for me if I get married? NOTE: I do not feel called to youth ministry, so please don’t recommend that.

 

[CarmeliteGirl25]

I am currently a sophomore in college, studying theology and philosophy. I have been discerning the Priesthood for around 3 years. I have somewhat recently started dating a young lady, and I am continuing to discern whether God is calling me to the married life or to the priesthood.

I had been fairly certain that God is calling me to the Priesthood until I met this girl and began to discern whether married life is what I am called to. I now see marriage as a possible vocation for me.

Here’s the problem: I desire to do work in the church. However, it seems that the areas in the Church I am drawn toward are reserved to the Priesthood. I recognize the importance of priests and do not want to take over any roles.

So my question is: What is a possible vocation in the Church for me if I get married? NOTE: I do not feel called to youth ministry, so please don’t recommend that.

Perhaps the Permanent Deaconate??

 

[Danuska]

What sort of ministry would interest you? There are soooo many options for lay people… and I know lots of couples involved I some of these…

 

[Eucharisted]

I am currently a sophomore in college, studying theology and philosophy. I have been discerning the Priesthood for around 3 years. I have somewhat recently started dating a young lady, and I am continuing to discern whether God is calling me to the married life or to the priesthood.

I had been fairly certain that God is calling me to the Priesthood until I met this girl and began to discern whether married life is what I am called to. I now see marriage as a possible vocation for me.

Here’s the problem: I desire to do work in the church. However, it seems that the areas in the Church I am drawn toward are reserved to the Priesthood. I recognize the importance of priests and do not want to take over any roles.

So my question is: What is a possible vocation in the Church for me if I get married? NOTE: I do not feel called to youth ministry, so please don’t recommend that.

1. I love your username
2. You could be a deacon, or a lector, or an Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion, or join an Apostleship (such as the Apostleship of Prayer or the Legion of Mary), or be an usher. There are many vocations which God could be calling you to. I suggest prayer, reflection, and research

 

[Cloisters]

I am currently a sophomore in college, studying theology and philosophy. I have been discerning the Priesthood for around 3 years. I have somewhat recently started dating a young lady, and I am continuing to discern whether God is calling me to the married life or to the priesthood.

I had been fairly certain that God is calling me to the Priesthood until I met this girl and began to discern whether married life is what I am called to. I now see marriage as a possible vocation for me.

Here’s the problem: I desire to do work in the church. However, it seems that the areas in the Church I am drawn toward are reserved to the Priesthood. I recognize the importance of priests and do not want to take over any roles.

So my question is: What is a possible vocation in the Church for me if I get married? NOTE: I do not feel called to youth ministry, so please don’t recommend that.

Does she know about your attraction to the sacerdotal?

You need a spiritual director, if you don’t already have one. Check with your diocesan vocation director, also.

Keep in mind that marriage doesn’t have a novitiate. And it could be that the permanent diaconate is where you’re called. You and your future wife will both have to go through classes, though.

The Holy Ghost works on attraction, and grace builds on nature.

HTH.

Blessings,
Cloisters

 

[Joannm]

Ther eare many things you can do in the Church as a lay person. With a degree in theology you can be a DRE, a Pastoral Associate, you can teach religion in a high school or in parishes or head up some of the many organizations in a parish. I know many lay people who work for the Church full time in miniterial postions.

 

[hamburglar]

Thank you so far for the recommendations. I have a couple of things I would like to note.

• My girlfriend knows about my discernment to the priesthood
• I am asking for a career in the Church, not serving as an usher, emhc, etc.
• I do not feel God is calling me to the permanent diaconate. If I were to serve in a Sacramental capacity, the Priesthood is where I should be. Plus, the program has been halted in my diocese.
• In my discernment of the Priesthood, I have been leaning towards the religious orders. To extend this to a lay vocation, I have been interested in things like the Knights Hospitalier of Malta, the Knights of Columbus, and other things like them. Perhaps I could serve in some sort of Administrative position in these organizations?
• Note about the Knights of Malta: I do have about 25% Matlese in my blood, so this is how I discovered them. However, I am not a member as you have to be invited, you don’t just apply.

 

[AveSantaMaria]

Mother Teresa was a Third-Order Franciscan, which means - to the best of horribly imperfect knowledge that she was not a nun. Many religious orders have lay orders, where one can marry while being a religious. Maybe one can talk to one’s spiritual director and pray the Rosary.

From St. Mary Faustina’s Diary: Divine Mercy in My Soul: Notebook 1, #245

… Yes, I will be with you always, if you always remain a little child and fear nothing. As I was your beginning here, so I will also be your end. Do not rely on creatures, even in the smallest things, because this displeases Me. I want to be alone in your soul. I will give light and strength to your soul, and you will learn from My representative that I am in you, and your uncertainty will vanish like mist before the rays of the sun.

saint-faustina.com/Diary/DMIMS5.shtml

Importance of the Most Holy Rosary for success in one’s vocation in life
“I think that I did not miss a single day in reciting it, including in the most terrible times of battle when I had no rest night or day. How often did I see her manifest intercession in the decisions which I made in choosing a precise tactic. Take then, the advice of an old soldier seasoned by experience: Do not neglect the recitation of the Rosary for any reason.” – Marshal Foch, great military leader of WWI.

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!
Sorrowful and Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us!

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

 

[brigid12]

There are lots and lots of third-orders/lay orders/secular orders (whatever they want to call them, right now - I always think of them as lay third-orders ). Look at some of the “stickies” at the top, here.

 

[ack]

Mother Teresa was a Third-Order Franciscan, which means - to the best of horribly imperfect knowledge that she was not a nun.

Mother Teresa was definitely a “nun” (using the term loosely to refer to a female religious) because she started her own religious congregation.

Are you sure that she was a Third Order Franciscan? Do you have a source for this? I didn’t think that religious could be members of Third Orders, and that only laypeople and diocesan priests could.

 

[hamburglar]

Another Note: I am interested in a career. I realize that secular third-orders or oblate are a possibility that I might take, but I am interested in a career in the Church.

 

[Joannm]

Another Note: I am interested in a career. I realize that secular third-orders or oblate are a possibility that I might take, but I am interested in a career in the Church.

Just note that careers in the Church are very, let’s just say, unstable. A new pastor comes in and you could be out of a job if he brings in his own people. Same in a diocese. I am concerned about my situation as my pastor retires in a bit over a year. Teaching might afford you more stability.

 

[AveSantaMaria]

Mother Teresa was definitely a “nun” (using the term loosely to refer to a female religious) because she started her own religious congregation.

Are you sure that she was a Third Order Franciscan? Do you have a source for this? I didn’t think that religious could be members of Third Orders, and that only laypeople and diocesan priests could.

I must greatly apologize to this thread!! Thank you SO MUCH for questioning my facts. Mother Teresa was not a Third Order Franciscan. Here is a clarification of Mother Teresa’s status by a person who knows more than me. He posts a wonderful thread on Franciscan Spirituality here: forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=263242

Hi Ave:

Bl. Mother Teresa was not a Secular Franciscan. Canon Law does not allow a person to be a member of another religious or secular institute and a member of the Secular Franciscan Order at the same time. Both require profession of obedience to the statues of their communities. This can cause a conflict of interest.

Neither was Mother Teresa a nun. She was a Sister. The Missionaries of Charity are an Apostolic Religious Congregation. Women in apostolic congregations or institutes do not make solemn vows of enclosure. The word “nun” comes from the word monastic. Mother Angelica is a nun, because the Poor Clares are Monastic not Apostolic or active in the world.

In the modern world people confuse the terms nun and sister.

The Missionaries of Charity are very Franciscan. Mother used the rule of St. Francis as her inspiration to write the statues for their congregation. They added one vow that is not in the Rule of St. Francis, Service to the Poor. But in every other way, they follow the Rule of St. Francis.

Hope this helps and may you be blessed by the Holy Child this season and always.

Fraternally,
JR

“Let us begin. Up to now we have done nothing.” (Francis of Assisi)

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse. Come Holy Spirit, come by means of the powerful intercession of the Immaculate Heart of Mary, your well beloved spouse.

For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world! For the sake of his sorrowful passion, have mercy on us and on the whole world!

O Mary, conceived without sin, pray for us who have recourse to thee!
Sorrowful and Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us!

*Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with Thee. Blessed art Thou among women and blessed is the fruit of Thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. *

 

[Pro_Domina]

I am currently a sophomore in college, studying theology and philosophy. I have been discerning the Priesthood for around 3 years. I have somewhat recently started dating a young lady, and I am continuing to discern whether God is calling me to the married life or to the priesthood.

I had been fairly certain that God is calling me to the Priesthood until I met this girl and began to discern whether married life is what I am called to. I now see marriage as a possible vocation for me.

Here’s the problem: I desire to do work in the church. However, it seems that the areas in the Church I am drawn toward are reserved to the Priesthood. I recognize the importance of priests and do not want to take over any roles.

So my question is: What is a possible vocation in the Church for me if I get married? NOTE: I do not feel called to youth ministry, so please don’t recommend that.

Lets speak straight up.

For three years you have heard a voice call you to a fight of great horizons.

You hear the voice of girl and in three seconds you turn your head in the other direction.

Getting married is no sin. Obviously.

But when it is not your vocation…

Think it well. Above all, pray pray and pray again.

 

[CarmeliteGirl25]

Lets speak straight up.

For three years you have heard a voice call you to a fight of great horizons.

You hear the voice of girl and in three seconds you turn your head in the other direction.

Getting married is no sin. Obviously.

But when it is not your vocation…

Think it well. Above all, pray pray and pray again.

Not following your God-given vocation is not a sin either. It is just a disappointment. God gave us all free will–the opportunity to choose what we want to do with our lives. If a certain person is called to religious life, but for some reason is not comfortable with the idea or is unable to join for reasons outside of their control, then why shouldn’t they be able to get married or stay single? God isn’t going to condemn you because you felt that you couldn’t do it. He wants us to be happy, so if you aren’t going to be happy in religious life, don’t do it.

Of course, the matters of faith and the heart are not to be taken lightly. One must pray about certain things AND speak to a well-educated, experienced spiritual director. Above all, it is YOUR choice what to do. Pray to God to give you the guidance necessary and then make an active effort to listen to what He says.

I have a good example:

Blessed Louis and Zelie Martin

Louis felt a call to the priesthood. Zelie felt the call to be a Daughter of Charity. Louis was unable to become a priest because he couldn’t learn Latin. Zelie wasn’t accepted at the order. Both became the parents of a great modern saint! St. Therese of Lisieux. They are on the road to sainthood themselves.

We are all called to sainthood and holiness. No one said that we had to be priests and religious to become saints. Perhaps you heard wrong on one of these callings to priesthood or marriage. Think it over, talk to a spiritual director, pray, and then make your decision. May God bless you on the way!

 

[BarbaraTherese]

A feeling one would like to become a priest or a sister or brother or a nun i.e. a feeling that God is calling one is not sufficient of itself to clearly indicate a call to that way of life… or to any other vocation in life, not only religious life or the priesthood…there are two other important factors that indicate the presence of a vocation - the first indication is the actual attraction as mentioned previously:

2 - God will supply what is necessary to live out that vocation…in other words, if one has clear impediments that cannot be overcome, then God is not calling to that particular way of life.

3 - That one is actually accepted into the way of life…i.e. the particular way of life is agreeable to accepting the person.
God does not ask the impossible.

When the three conditions above are present, the indications are that God is probably calling the person to that particular way of life. If any of the above are clearly absent, then God is not calling the person to that way of life.

We really do need to regard our Baptism ***not ***as a default vocation but as our prime and original call from God out of which flows any other call…and our Baptism remains the foundation of all calls. Particular vocations are a call from God to live out our Baptismal call to holiness and to follow Christ and His Gospel in a particular manner. It is a call to live out our Baptism in a particular way, not something to replace it.
Are all called to live out their Baptism in some particular way or with some particular vocation and call from God…yes we all are so asked, simply because we are all totally unique creations?..and through our Baptism we all have a call to holiness and to follow Christ and His Gospel flowing out of that uniqueness or ground of our being and it is to this Christ calls to follow Him in a particular way, vocation or calling.

Barb

 

[BarbaraTherese]

We are all Spouses of Christ through our Baptism and it is my firm belief that until that understanding pervades and even ‘excites’ us all without exemption, then the true nature and honor and esteem of our Baptism will not find full flower. And the continued use of the term “Spouse of Christ” in a too limited context will continue this sad, very sad, and abortive understanding - and a quite false one. After all if a term is “too limited” then it is false by derfinition. Vatican II has made a very real attempt to correct all this, although I am convinced that the various statements and documents coming out of The Council are yet to be really fully understood with all the full implications for both lay, religious and priestly life.

Any decision carried out, lived out, which deepens our commitment to our Baptism and to Christ and His Gospel is spousal in context and again by definition. By the very same token, the failure to so live is a betrayal of that spousal relationship according to level of insight.