Like-minded people

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I think one of the best ways to get to know people at a new parish is to start attending extracurricular activities like a bible study or any other small group type thing that you might be interested in. Introduce yourself to the priest and ask what functions they have that you would be interested in. The other people that are involved at the parish will most likely be the ones who take their faith seriously.
 
Cassandra_Lyn said:
I would say I am at the very beginning of my spiritual journey. I am 31 and just became a Christian back in August. I am finally going to attend my first Mass this Sunday (technically, it will be my second, because I went to a wedding in a Catholic church back in September)

I want to go to church, first and foremost, to worship God and to have a closer relationship to Him. But I also want Christian community in my life. I hope to make friends and eventually meet a man who will become my husband one day, perhaps.

This is to say I hope to meet like-minded people, those like myself who want to honor God through the way we live out our lives…

I am not so naive as to assume every person I meet through the church is going to be a devout Christian or even a reasonably good person, because I have met Catholics in the past who didn’t live their lives very well. They were just so very angry and bitter.

I realize that I will be attending mass along with people who are in all different stages of life as well as in different stages of their spiritual journey… I envision a lot of them basically going through the motions of getting up on Sunday mornings and dragging in to church because… it would disappoint certain individuals, whether family, friend or neighbor, if they didn’t do that… It’s perhaps a face-saving thing, like “I better go to church because if I don’t go every so-and-so and their mother is going to ask me why I didn’t go”

So I have no illusions that as I head in to this new community it will be filled with happy smiling good people who won’t do me wrong… I guess what I’m wondering is… two things… Do you find a lot of like-minded people in your church? That is, people who honor God by the way they live their lives and really care about helping their Christian brothers and sisters to do the same? Do you find your church to be a mix of that and also some other elements?

How do you deal with the other element? Meaning, those bitter people who show up because they feel like they have to, but seem to have no interest in leading a Christian lifestyle.
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Hi Cassandre,

I would try to connect with everybody regardless of where they are. I am less “on fire” than I was 2 years ago, and yet looking back on myself, I believe I was more judgmental and ignorant back then as I am now. In spite of my outward flame cooling off a little bit, I believe God has advanced me and will continue to do this.

You do not need to be perfectly like-minded with somebody in order to have a meaningful relationship with them. I believe often times the most meaningful relationships are with those who are considerably different from us. Connecting with people the most like ourselves is the easiest to do, and so we tend to do it, but we probably don’t draw as much from it as we would with somebody else.

If you are a convert into the faith, you need to be careful especially of spiritual pride. This will inhibit your ability to build connections with other sinners.

And to answer the question: no. There is not a single person in my parish who I feel is in a very similar state in life than where I currently am. Which doesn’t mean I’m an exceptionally holy person. It just means my state of life is very irregular. So, I’ve learned the hard way to just reach out anyway. There’s nothing to lose.
 
Cassandra_Lyn said:
I would say I am at the very beginning of my spiritual journey. I am 31 and just became a Christian back in August. I am finally going to attend my first Mass this Sunday (technically, it will be my second, because I went to a wedding in a Catholic church back in September)

I want to go to church, first and foremost, to worship God and to have a closer relationship to Him. But I also want Christian community in my life. I hope to make friends and eventually meet a man who will become my husband one day, perhaps.

This is to say I hope to meet like-minded people, those like myself who want to honor God through the way we live out our lives…

I am not so naive as to assume every person I meet through the church is going to be a devout Christian or even a reasonably good person, because I have met Catholics in the past who didn’t live their lives very well. They were just so very angry and bitter.

I realize that I will be attending mass along with people who are in all different stages of life as well as in different stages of their spiritual journey… I envision a lot of them basically going through the motions of getting up on Sunday mornings and dragging in to church because… it would disappoint certain individuals, whether family, friend or neighbor, if they didn’t do that… It’s perhaps a face-saving thing, like “I better go to church because if I don’t go every so-and-so and their mother is going to ask me why I didn’t go”

So I have no illusions that as I head in to this new community it will be filled with happy smiling good people who won’t do me wrong… I guess what I’m wondering is… two things… Do you find a lot of like-minded people in your church? That is, people who honor God by the way they live their lives and really care about helping their Christian brothers and sisters to do the same? Do you find your church to be a mix of that and also some other elements?

How do you deal with the other element? Meaning, those bitter people who show up because they feel like they have to, but seem to have no interest in leading a Christian lifestyle.
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I’m sick and it’s hard to get to Church sometimes … but when I do drag this tired worn out body to Church it’s not because I care what people on this earth might say … it’s because I want to please God and glorify our Lord Jesus Christ.

As far as finding like-minded people, your best bet for that is to join some of the Church ministries … people who give their time to the Church beyond Mass are probably the type of people you are seeking. Good luck and may God Bless you.
 
So I went to my very first Catholic Mass yesterday and it was lovely!!!
I felt very peaceful throughout the whole thing despite not exactly knowing what to do… I knew not to take Communion, as I am not baptized… and one question I do have is about that… I think I will make it a separate thread.
But I loved it and can’t wait to go again.
 
I’m so happy to hear you went to your first mass today!
I’m a convert as well, from 1994. I have found that the more I attend mass, the more beautiful and uplifting I find it to be. It’s heaven come down to earth.

Find out if there’s a Bible study at your parish. There are 2 weekly ones at ours, and they are the highlight of my week (aside from mass). Only between 6 and 12 people go each week, and they are all intent on learning about God and Scripture.

At church, I just assume most of the people are holier than me. Why else would they be there regularly? There’s one sweet little lady who I’m sure is at mass every time the door is open. There are rosary groups, and K of C groups, and ministries. I’m sure you will find a group who can provide the fellowship we all need.
If there isn’t one, you could offer to start one.

.
 
It’s important to remember that people are complicated and faith can be a bit of an up and down thing. Personally I have good and bad Sundays, one week I might be in church and feel very connected with the mass and happy to be there, the next week I might be feeling unhappy and will have had to force myself out to go to mass and going through the motions is the best I can do. Try not to categorize people as good and bad parishioners, most people are doing the best they can.
 
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