Living a Committed Single Life

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What are your thoughts on someone living life intentionally as a single person? Do you consider this a valid vocation? Can you see God calling someone to neither marriage nor a celibate religious life?

I look at my past. My failed relationships. My random sexual encounters. My dragging my feet as my scheduled wedding nears.

Thinking about living a committed single life brings me a feeling of peace and comfort. This is not a mere desire to avoid marriage. I see benefits of being single and how such a life would grant me freedom that would not be possible as a married man.

I can see myself free to be a bigger part of the Church. I can see serving the Church in ways I could never consider as a married man. I can see connecting with others on a profound level. I can see myself living without the cumbersome overarching theme of seeking out a potential spouse.

All these years… After the possibility of priesthood being denied me… After so many relationships that weren’t meant to be… Perhaps I’m not meant for any relationship as a married man…

Thanks for reading.
 
I love my wife but if I hadn’t met her I would still be single. There are a lot of times when I don’t do things that are important to me regarding the church because she is my first responsibility. Jesus was single and He did just fine. Singles should not be pressured to be married. I don’t believe people should be pressured to be single either.
 
I was the same before I met my husband. I think that there is a real place for single men and women in God’s plan. I was actually resigned to a single celibate life !
 
I don’t mean living as a single person until you meet your spouse. I mean living the rest of your life in chastity as a single person. I mean freeing yourself from the need to search for a spouse. I mean committing to remaining single for the rest of your life.
 
It is an excellent vocation if you are indeed called to it. If you feel in some way that is God’s will for you: want you to be free from anxieties.

The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided.

And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband.

I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.

Paul to the Corinthians, 1st letter, chapter 7
 
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Single is a state of life, but not a vocation unless it is in the context of religious/consecrated life. Married people have vows to “lock them in” to their state of life and exclude them canonically from other vocations (except that Eastern rite Catholic men are generally able to be ordained); priests cannot marry unless they are laicized first. Single unconsecrated people, on the other hand, are not “locked in” to their singlehood, as they have not taken a vow; nor are they prohibited (based on a vow) from seeking marriage or priestly/religious/consecrated life.

Is it possible you are simply feeling guilty over past sexual sins and are using this as a form of penance?
 
I don’t think it has to be cumbersome to find a wife for you. I’m also not 100% sure about God calling people to marriage or to single hood. If you found a wife in the next two weeks, and married her in three months time, would you say you got a sudden call from God to be married? I’m also not sure if you didn’t find somebody in the next five years, would you say, it just wasn’t meant to be, hence not God’s will? I think it’s more a question of “Seek and you shall find.” You just have to know what you want to find. Are you prepared to look after a woman in her old age? Do you want somebody around every day?
 
Jesus, St. Paul, St. Mary Magdelene, St. John the Baptist, St. John the Evangelist, all single
 
Maybe you just haven’t found the right woman yet? There’s no set amount of time that it takes after all. For some, maybe there is no right partner but I think you should always remain OPEN to the possibility that just maybe there’s someone out there just waiting for you. you never know.
 
I definitely don’t feel like the single life is for me. It feels just absolutely terrible at this point. Unfortunately, there doesn’t seem to be a way around it.
 
Spend some time discerning it and if that’s what you are called to, rather than where you end up then that is awesome, good for you. I am spending the rest of my life single and celibate and am delighted about it. I also feel it gives me the space and time to serve God as I feel called to. Everything else just got in the way, lol and now I feel so free I see quite clearly all the other things (relationships) were clearly me running away. Good luck too you.
 
Ron when I was single all my friends who were married, divorced, and single were always telling me I needed a wife (as if they were prophets). I was very content being single. So my prayer went something like this, Lord if you want me married, send me someone of like faith, and make her attractive to me. Otherwise, I’ll live morally as a single and I WON’T COMPLAIN ABOUT SINGLEHOOD. I wasn’t looking when my wife showed up. and when she did BAM first date 7/4 married 8/27. Seven years later and only one spat.
 
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