Losing faith, losing hope

[Philena]

I’ve been a baptized Christian my whole life. I entered the Catholic Church three years ago. All my life my only prayer was to do the will of my Father in heaven.

Yet so far my life has been a disaster. Three failed marriages. The first to a pedophile, the second to a pot-head, and the third to an alcoholic. And NO, I didn’t know about their problems when I married them. Those problems came out later. I always just wanted to be a happy wife and mother, but it sure didn’t turn out that way. Maybe God (if he exists, ha!) didn’t want me to be married.

In the past two years I was married, got pregnant, had a miscarriage, lost a good job, and my alcoholic husband left me. My company no longer pays the premiums on my children’s heath insurance, so they have accident coverage only. I’m now forced to either sell my home or declare bankruptcy. I have huge debts and no money to pay them. I have three teenage children to support.

Where is God when it hurts? If he loves me, why doesn’t he help me? I love my children and help them when they need help. Where is the church? No one seems to care. Rather, they shun me because my husband was also a new Catholic and popular in the parish. Yet he is the one who no longers attends Mass and is living in sin with another woman.

I’m really starting to believe either that there is no God, or that he just created the world and then left the rest to us.

Prove to me that he cares. Sure he cares (if he exists) for humanity in general, but why doesn’t he care for me and my kids in particular? Why would he allow such pain if he is all powerful and all loving?

 

[katy]

The problem of suffering has always been difficult for me too. I am also a convert. When life was similar for me, I hung onto my faith by my fingernails, but I am glad I did. Praying became just another way of worrying, so I used the Rosary, etc. Hang onto hope and try to determine how God is guiding you. Maybe your teens can earn money to contribute to the family. I expect others can give more help, but just wanted you to know someone else has felt the same way ( and may again), and is glad to have looked to God and Mother Mary.

 

[mzungu1]

Hello Philena. I can’t give you answers, but I can pray for you. I believe that the Church is the people who are united toward our own path to God and faith. This support group will give you good advice and, yes, solice. I think, that sometimes, the answers come to us in places where we are not looking and in ways that we don’t always understand. I am the last to give advice because I am still wandering through the wilderness myself. I just hope that the good people around you will be there to support you and help you in your journey. If they cannot, find a way to be around good people during your time of need. I am sorry if this sounds like tripe, I can only offer words and prayers.

Godspeed & Godbless.

“Try to be Good” TLR

 

[YinYangMom]

why doesn’t he care for me and my kids in particular? Why would he allow such pain if he is all powerful and all loving?

I wonder if those thoughts ever crossed Mary’s mind…especially as she watched her son be taken away, brutally beaten and whipped along to road to his execution.

That is what I reflect upon whenever I start feeling lost, abandoned. It snaps me out of my funk rather quickly.

Of course God loves you.
Of course God loves your children.
But pain and suffering are part of His mission on earth…
His only Son endured the most unimaginable pain we could imagine - especially since he was innocent - so undeserving of such persecuion!

Yet here you are enduring your own brand of trials and tribulations, why? Because He wants to reach out to others through your sufferings - the way you embrace them is how you bear witness to your love and trust in God. When you hand over your troubles to Him your troubles will be resolved - probably not in the way you expect them to be, but they do get resolved…

Have you taken your concerns to Eucharistic Adoration?
Have you spoken to your priest about them?
Have you asked for the help from a St. Vincent DePaul society in your area?

I will keep you and your family in my prayers and I trust He will send people your way to help you through this challenge. Hang in there.

 

[Kevin42]

Why would God the Father allow Jesus Christ to suffer so much? The trinity shares a perfect love that we cannot even comprehend, yet Jesus did the will of the Father, which was suffering to the point of death. What did this accomplish? I’m sure you know, but for one, it showed to the rest of the whole world the love of God for His people.

I could quote you numerous scripture passages, such as the one from tonights homily where Jesus teaches that the Messiah must suffer. Peter then rebukes this, but Jesus then rebukes Peter saying, “Get behind me, Satan. You are thinking not as God does, but as human beings do.” He then goes on to say, “Whoever wishes to come after me must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake and that of the gospel will save it.” This is just another way of the devil trying to draw you away from God. Satan tries to get us to think as human beings do, and reject suffering and to think that a lovinig God wouldn’t do this. When the devil tries to get us to think this, we need to cling fast to our faith and say what Jesus said when he rebuked Peter.

None of us on the forum can pretend to know why God is allowing you to suffer all that you have. However, you, and all of the rest of us, must always trust that even if we cannot see the will of God, or the point of what he is putting is through, we must have faith. You may not understand what is going on in your life now, in a month, in a year, or even for the rest of your life you may not understand why God is allowing all that He has. Just have faith in Him though and remember His love for you and your children. I will keep you in my prayers. Christ’s peace be with you always.

 

[scapularkid8]

Pray the Rosary. It will help. I guarantee it!! I will pray for you and your children. Peace be with you.

 

[Rolltide]

Part of what you also need to understand is the nature of evil. What is it that makes evil, “evil”, so to speak? Well, with regard to free will, when people chose to do evil, the consequences of their actions, which occur generally out of selfishness, also extend to those who are innocent, sometimes profoundly. In your case, the immoral acts of your husbands have caused great harm to you and your family through no fault of your own. That damage to others is precisely why evil is so destructive. God permits it to occur, but it greatly saddens him. He has to let it occur, or there would be no free will.

Now, the role of God and religion is to teach us how to avoid sin and through him, gain entry into heaven, as well as to lean on his love and support when things go bad. God gives us the strength to know that no matter how bad things may get, there is hope for us and our salvation if we believe in him and strive to do good. Think of the struggles that early Christians had to face, and they never lost faith. It is even possible that our reward may not come in this lifetime, but may be reserved for heaven. It is this that has brought comfort to so many of the poor throughout the ages. Despite horrible circumstances, their faith and struggle would ultimately be recognized by God. But… faith and belief also help us in the here and now. The Catholic community should be dedicated to helping the less fortunate and those who are in trouble. That would include you. Sometimes, this does not occur, because many Catholics do not fully live out their faith.

I would add that if you are not receiving the support you need from your particular parish, that perhaps you could seek out another priest or parish to talk to. There are many agencies of the Catholic Church to help people in just your situation.

 

[latin_rite]

I’m really starting to believe either that there is no God, or that he just created the world and then left the rest to us.

QUOTE]

I know how you feel. My life hasnt been a bed of roses either.but the past two years have been really tough. With both a very sick wife and child. Amongst other things. And over these past two years i have question both God and my beliefs. I think thats just the normal human thing.each time i tried to give up on God i just couldn’t find myself doing it. many times i asked what have i done wrong. You asked for us to show you that God excist. but i think you know you’re the only one who can do that.maybe if like me faced with the death of two who you love more than life it self, you have to say to yourself. hey maybe i havent got it so bad. sure three husbands are gone. but by the sounds of it that might be a good thing. you still have your kids and your health. i’m not belittling what you are going through believe me. for i have experienced many of the things you speak of, instead of husbands it was my father,and it is hard…But luckly for me. there is now a light at the end of the long dark tunnel for both my wife and child. But i’m ranting now. I guess sometimes to find God one has to seek him or to meet him half way, maybe he is there but all you need do is open your eyes? Remeber three of your problems were not caused by you or God , but by three of your husbands. I suggest go and sit by your childrens bed while they are sleeping and just look at them, and think how lucky you are that they are there with you safe healthy and happy with a mother who loves them.

 

[paramedicgirl]

Put all your trust in God. Place all your sufferings in His hands. Ask Him to help you keep your faith. And most definitely, pray the rosary daily.

The devil is having a field day seeing you suffer and knowing that it is causing you to lose faith. Don’t help him out by becoming despondent. God will bring good out of your sufferings if you trust Him.

My prayers are with you.

 

[Coder]

Stay the course and be optimistic. May we all pray for grace and give glory to God by staying positive in difficult times.

Begin some positive things that may stabilize you on a positive course:

• Participate in mass.
• Exercise.
• Avoid all further situations that would disrupt your peace.
• Find work that you like and determine that you are going to grow in the employment no matter what it is. All employers like a motivated employee that identifies with their goals.
• Draw wisdom from lessons learned.
  Determine that each day’s steps are going to lead to a better situation and don’t look back.