Love or Money? Society's Focus

[Sorbetto]

Here’s a sort of long, strange question. I didn’t know where else to post it. It requires a story http://forum.catholic.com/images/smilies/smile.gif (I also posted this in Water Cooler…wasn’t sure where it belonged.)

I graduated from a prestigious college preparatory boarding high school with a 3.9 and a lot of qualifications under my belt. I was accepted to several good schools with almost full scholarships, and decided on one in New York City.

Mean time, the previous summer I’d found my birth father who lives in the same state as I do, and after I graduated this past summer I also met a wonderful Catholic man. I was introduced to the Catholic faith, can’t wait to convert next fall, am completely in love with my boyfriend, and have plans to be engaged after I convert.

I met him in August. In August, I had decided to defer a semester from school because of many many family problems and demons, and also being afraid to go too far from my father. We’ve been seeing much of each other and developing the relationship we missed out on for 17 years. He is almost 60, with a bad case of diabetes, and I’m afraid there’s not much time left. So when spring rolled around, I decided going to NYC was a bad idea altogether, being that I didn’t want to leave my dad OR boyfriend, and settled for a small, private, eh-reputation, school I could commute to from home.

Now I’m not necessarily regretting my decision, but have thought about transferring. There’s a lack of places to go nearby, though. I keep trying to push away my feelings of pride that I am “too good for this place.” I’m too worried about the “name.” But all I want to be is a wonderful wife and mother in the Catholic faith. I can’t wait to marry and have children with my boyfriend and make a difference by living right.

But influences in my life, from this prestigious school I graduated from, etc.,…keep making me feel this sense of…something? I can’t explain it. I guess my question is, what, honestly, from people who have been through it, is more important here:

SCHOOL (will I regret settling for this school?)
FAMILY (my dad and future husband)

It’s hard being young…I can’t see forward. Any opinions??

Sorry for rambling, I wanted opinions from people who share my faith.

 

[puzzleannie]

what is your purpose for going to school? is it for a career path, route to further graduate study or professional school? you choose your college and program based on a clear focus on what you are trying to accomplish and which school/program will further those goals. prestige or name school means very little for undergrad unless it is a question of getting into the right grad school or professional program, and even there the prestige will get you nowhere if your performance and acheivement don’t match.

what are your priorities right now? is there a reason other than guilt to take care of your father? most parents would not want their children to sacrifice their own needs and this time or defer their own education. Sounds like this is a family situation that needs a family discussion and decisions, not a unilateral call for you to carry the whole burden.

are either you or the new boyfriend in a position to marry and raise a family right now? if not, dating and courtship with the possibility of an increasingly intense and romantic relationship should not even be considered.
when you get your priorities in order, the rest of the decisions will follow.

 

[dhgray]

Lots of colleges in PA.

50states.com/college/penn.htm

univsource.com/pa.htm

Follow your heart.