Loving God

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Brian2944

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Hello Everyone,

I’m having a very difficult time and I was wondering if anybody could offer some advice. I’ve studied the faith for a little over a year now and I’m currently in RCIA. I have come to the point where I feel like I know a lot ABOUT God but I don’t KNOW God. All I know is doctrine and I want so much to fall in love with Christ so that that love may fulfill the law I’m struggling to obey. I feel lost right now, and I’m sure it’s a period of dryness, but it seems like I’m missing something is my spiritual journey, something I’m not seeing.

The joy and peace in Christ I thought I would have is not there. I try to give all to Him, but my resolve is weakening. And the power of my will to resist sin is weakening. Since I’m not yet in communion with Church I’m not able to receive the sanctifying grace that the sacraments offer, but I’m continuing to give God thanks and praise.

I guess it all comes down to this question:

How do you go beyond doctrine and knowledge and fall in love with God Himself ??
 
I’ve been sitting here staring at the computer screen blankly for about five minutes or so trying to tell you the answer that should surely coming pouring out of my heart with confidence, but to be honest with you, I am feeling a bit dry myself at the moment. Don’t get me wrong, I love God with every last molecule, every last breath. Just, right now, at this particular time I just can’t even feel God. I’ve known him a long time, all my life really, and he has always been there with me even and has given me so much comfort, so much strength, and so much hope whenever I needed it the most. So, I am not about to give up on him.

One really great way to get closer to God is to get to know those who are dear to him. I suggest reading some of the books written by about the saints. I think they have a way of bringing God just a little bit closer to us when he seems so far away. Try praying to the saints too. One of my favorites is Saint Therese, the Little Flower. You can read about her in her autobiography, Story of a Soul.

You can also take comfort in knowing that even the saints felt the same way that you are feeling right now. I find this prayer from Saint Anselm particularly comforting:

O Lord my God,
Teach my heart this day where and how to see you,
Where and how to find you.
You have made me and remade me,
And you have bestowed on me
All the good things I possess,
And still I do not know you.
I have not yet done that
For which I was made.
Teach me to seek you,
For I cannot seek you
Unless you teach me,
Or find you
Unless you show yourself to me.
Let me seek you in my desire,
Let me desire you in my seeking.
Let me find you by loving you,
Let me love you when I find you.
  • St. Anselm
 
Thanks for posting that prayer, Dulcissima. I copied it down. I hope that more people will answer this question, too!
 
Brian2944 said:
How do you go beyond doctrine and knowledge and fall in love with God Himself ??
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What a fantastic question. I would say the answer is you take up your cross and you follow him.

I found God working with handicapped children in Lourdes. Go and become the servant and you will find your master. What is God calling you to do?
 
Pray, pray for Jesus’s revelation.
Pray, pray in front of the Blessed Sacrament.
Pray, pray to have time to spent with Jesus.
Pray, pray to see God’s love in the people you love.

Pray, my friend. That’s was my experience.

I am a cradle Catholic, but I did not realize God’s love until I am 21. And only through my mom’s love for me. She is a devout Catholic.👍
I realized how much my mom loves me. Anything about the proverbial Mother’s Love, she demonstrated.
I came to the realization that if my mom loves me that much, how much more Jesus is loving me.

Think back and appreciate the most beatiful, loving, caring things that my mom did for me. Through that portal of love, I can taste a bit of Jesus’ sweet love for me.

A dialog is needed in a loving relationship.
Talk to him.
Spend time with him.
Just sit there in his Presence.

Good luck

Tak
 
Brian2944 said:
How do you go beyond doctrine and knowledge and fall in love with God Himself ??
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Jesus told us, almost the last thing he said to us before his death, If you love Me you will keep my commandments. You are on the right track, to learn the fullness of what He commanded and to carry it out to the best of your ability. This calls for humily and obedience (as I am sure complying with the seemingly arbitrary process called “RCIA” has already taught you). Whatever you do in direct obedience to the commandments, beatitudes and laws of the Church, do for the love of Christ, that is, consciously, deliberately state in prayer your intention to do so. Whatever you do in carrying out the normal duties of your state in life, and those moments of heroic virtue when you go above and beyond, offer consciously, deliberately in prayer to Christ for love of Him. This habit, according to all the great spiritual writers, will draw you closer to Him.

welcome home and congratulations
you have asked precisely the proper first question that should be asked by someone in your circumstance.
 
Dear Brian,

Thank you for your sincere question. I was compelled by your post because I see an earnest desire to love God. If I may make a few recommendations that you might consider, should they be beneficial to your relationship with the Lord:
  1. Read Scripture every day out loud and think about it. I recommend this first because of two things: “Ignorance of Scripture is ignorance of Christ”-St. Jerome, and “we cannot love what we do not know”- St. Augustine.
We learn of Christ through Scripture, and we come to love him through the Sacraments as well (which I know you eagerly anticipate). How else can we come to know who Christ is were it not first for the Bible (and of course Tradition).
God’s words are sweeter than honey! (Psalm 119)
  1. Keep praying regularly. The commitment to spend time with God is hard to keep when we do not feel any response. However, God is always there with us even when we do not feel it. Some days may feel very dry spiritually, but on those days God is just as close to you. He never leaves us or forsakes us (Hebrews 13:5).
  2. Be patient. Sometimes God removes any consolation or feeling because he is drawing our souls into a deeper union with him. Look at Job! Also, consider the lives of St. John of the Cross (Dark Night of the Soul is his book) or St. Theresa of Avila (Interior Castle). When your soul grows, it sometimes has to pass through periods of “darkness.” It may be the case, however, that precisely when we feel it is dark, it is actually brilliant, it is just that it is a new spiritual stage that we do not realize how to see we are connected to Christ in a new way.
  3. Ask God for help, even if you may not “feel” he is connected to you. Trust in him with faith, for the hope of his promises.
  4. True love is an unconditional choice and commitment. Marriage is “agape” love, and to love God is to love him with “agape” love. If you believe the depth or strength of your love can be measured by what you “feel”, then it will inevitably be subject to your whims and ever changing emotions. True love is faithful, through better or worse. If you want to love God, be faithful to him during this seemingly absent time in your relationship.
  5. Growing in knowledge of God, or of doctrine should not be seen as in opposition or competition with devotion. John Henry Newman mentions this in one of his writings ( I think it is actually entitled doctrine and devotion). I hope you do not feel you have to abandon your study of doctrine in order to grow closer to God; rather, maybe you must seriously look at your prayer life and see if you can make any changes to it.
    Perhaps you can focus on fine tuning it for now. The mind is meant to be the vessel through which we contemplate God, and Jesus asks us to love him with all of our heart, mind, and soul. Studying and loving God should be complementary, and I can tell you also think this since you have studied and are learning more about your Catholic faith.
I hope this helps you and may God bless you. Please post again if you have questions.

CA3891
 
Thank you everyone for the great advice! I will be patient and wait on the Lord. Just reading the responses everyone wrote makes me feel a lot better. Just knowing the longing in my heart for God is a sure sign that He is working in my heart is reasuring. Thanks again everyone!

God Bless 🙂
 
CA3891 said:
Dear Brian,

Thank you for your sincere question. I was compelled by your post because I see an earnest desire to love God. If I may make a few recommendations that you might consider, should they be beneficial to your relationship with the Lord:
  1. Read Scripture every day out loud and think about it. I recommend this first because of two things: “Ignorance of Scripture is ignorance of Christ”-St. Jerome, and “we cannot love what we do not know”- St. Augustine.
We learn of Christ through Scripture, and we come to love him through the Sacraments as well (which I know you eagerly anticipate). How else can we come to know who Christ is were it not first for the Bible (and of course Tradition).
God’s words are sweeter than honey! (Psalm 119)
  1. Keep praying regularly. The commitment to spend time with God is hard to keep when we do not feel any response. However, God is always there with us even when we do not feel it. Some days may feel very dry spiritually, but on those days God is just as close to you. He never leaves us or forsakes us (Hebrews 13:5).
  2. Be patient. Sometimes God removes any consolation or feeling because he is drawing our souls into a deeper union with him. Look at Job! Also, consider the lives of St. John of the Cross (Dark Night of the Soul is his book) or St. Theresa of Avila (Interior Castle). When your soul grows, it sometimes has to pass through periods of “darkness.” It may be the case, however, that precisely when we feel it is dark, it is actually brilliant, it is just that it is a new spiritual stage that we do not realize how to see we are connected to Christ in a new way.
  3. Ask God for help, even if you may not “feel” he is connected to you. Trust in him with faith, for the hope of his promises.
  4. True love is an unconditional choice and commitment. Marriage is “agape” love, and to love God is to love him with “agape” love. If you believe the depth or strength of your love can be measured by what you “feel”, then it will inevitably be subject to your whims and ever changing emotions. True love is faithful, through better or worse. If you want to love God, be faithful to him during this seemingly absent time in your relationship.
  5. Growing in knowledge of God, or of doctrine should not be seen as in opposition or competition with devotion. John Henry Newman mentions this in one of his writings ( I think it is actually entitled doctrine and devotion). I hope you do not feel you have to abandon your study of doctrine in order to grow closer to God; rather, maybe you must seriously look at your prayer life and see if you can make any changes to it.
    Perhaps you can focus on fine tuning it for now. The mind is meant to be the vessel through which we contemplate God, and Jesus asks us to love him with all of our heart, mind, and soul. Studying and loving God should be complementary, and I can tell you also think this since you have studied and are learning more about your Catholic faith.
I hope this helps you and may God bless you. Please post again if you have questions.

CA3891
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Heartily endorse all of the above. I’d also find a good book of lives of the saints and get to know and love Christ by getting to know and love those who have been his closest imitators and most faithful servants.

They all had warts and quirks, all very different personalities, different paths to holiness and ways of service, and there are bound to be some who resonate with you for whatever reason.
 
Dear Brian,

I am glad so many are praying for you and are encouraging your walk with God. Thank you for also responding to show your appreciation.

If I may, I just wanted to offer a thought that I have held dear to me, and I hope it may offer you some assurance, if that is what you may benefit from at this moment:

God is always at work in us, whether or not we are feeling a longing for him. His effectiveness is not dependent on our doing; it is just the extent to which we recognize his presence in our lives is what changes.
 
Something which I found amazingly good. make friends with those who love the Catholic religion and thus love Christ. You will find your mind expanding in love for Him as you and your friends discuss the gospels ,ponder over His words,go to mass together, pray before the sacraments and exchange smiles afterwards…the growth you feel in love for Him will be tangible.
 
One thing that may be helpful is spending time with Jesus as he is revealed in the gospels. People find different forms of prayer help them more/less, and so it may be an idea to try different forms. I seem to recall a book I read when I was younger called ‘Dangerous Prayer: Being Vulnerable to God’ which was very helpful to me at one point.

You could try Imaginative Contemplation. There’s a description of how here:

yaim.jesuit.org.au/contemplation.html

It’s one way to really encounter Jesus in prayer, and it is, after all Jesus who you’re falling in love with, so spending time with Him is probably the best answer of all 🙂
 
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