Marriage life and religious life

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TheMarriedKnight

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I know marriage is my vocation and I’m not giving that up. It’s just that I also feel called to live my life in a religious way serving others in my church and the community. Is it possible for me to dedicate my life to my marriage and servience to my church/community in a religious way?
 
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Absolutely! Many married people service in their parish communities in a variety of ways. You could be involved in lay ministry at Mass (e.g. adult altar server, reader, usher, greeter), you could teach CCD or lead a youth group, you could be involved in the Knights of Columbus (I am guessing for your username that you’re a man), or you could discern a possible vocation to the permanent diaconate if your future wife is supportive (assuming that I’m correct and you are a man). You could also become involved in your pastoral advisory council. You might even be able to find a paid position within the parish, such as a parish office assistant.
 
Thank you for your response and you are right I am a man. The two suggestions I liked the most were The Knights of Columbus (since I’m one already) and Permanent Deacon. I have given becoming a deacon some though before and like the idea. It would go really nicely with my career too. Do you think I should pray it over well with
God?
 
I’m 24 and going to be done with college in 8 more months. If you are asking me my age. If not can you please explain?
 
You have many years to discern a diaconal vocation. Minimal age for married deacons is 35.

And some time of stability in your marriage, etc.

Start be becoming involved in your parish life.

Joining the Knights and being called by Christ to Sacred Orders are not in the same ballpark. Orders of magnitude in difference.

Active, prayerful, men are those who are typically approached by another deacon or priest to investigate the diaconate.

I remain a sinner,
Deacon Christopher
 
I was asking because my husband has gone through periods of time where he felt called to do more for the church. Becoming a deacon is one of them.

However, his complete focus is the children and being a provider for his family.

He does a few things for the parish. He belongs to the knights, men of st Joseph’s and is an active member of the parish council.

He’s been able to slowly add extras because I’m not so taxed with the children at the moment.
He will be dialing it back if and when we have another kid.

Being away from your wife when she has infants, toddlers, a combination of both or more…is stressful for her and would build up resentment.

You’re probably thinking “I know this, I just said my primary focus is my marriage.”
However, you aren’t there yet…having kids is a completely different dynamic that can seriously change things and force so much onto the back burner for years.

Even with older children…you aren’t totally off the hook. The girls have school events and activities. I’ve gone back to work and we are preparing for major life events for our kids…our oldest is receiving first holy communion soon and my husband is really prepping her for it.

Maybe your biggest calling to fill this extra vocation is to really prep and produce children who are good Catholics and stick with the church through religious life and marriage.

This is something my husband has started to realize and we are both working really hard at it.
 
I place my future wife and children before the church/community and they take up a lot of time (which I don’t mind since I love my vocation of marriage) so you are right I may not have a chance to also dedicate my time the church like I desire. You are also right about the greatest thing for a spous and parent is raising our children and taking care of us each other. I’m more than willing to accept that may not do everything I want to do for God, but I’m happy that I will get to do what matters the most to me, which is being and nurturing my domestic church (my wife and children). You are and husband sound like a great couple and parents. God bless you. I’m sure you will do a great job at being spouses and parents like myself one day. :family_man_woman_girl_boy:
 
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Let me say it’s a pleasure for me to be responding to an important figure in the church. I will take your advice to heart. I’ll start voluntaring more as a knight and be more active in my church as well as start discerning if I truly desire to be a Deacon after I’m done with college and am married with children. If I do eventually choose to go through with becoming a Deacon I hope I can be as modest as you.
 
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