Marriage options

[Kendall]

Suppose a young lady who is Catholic, (not a perfect Catholic, but Catholic, nonetheless), is engaged to a baptized evangelical protestant who is somewhat open to the Church, but feels pressure from home, just as the Catholic girl does. Their options for the wedding, as I understand, are as follows: Get married in the Catholic Church by a validly ordained Priest with No Nuptial Mass (since he isn’t Catholic) I assume this is allowed and happens frequently. OR… get married outside the Church by someone other than a validly ordained Priest. I assume that this marriage would then NOT receive the Church’s Blessing, and therefore the young lady would find herself “outside” of the Church until such time as (a) he became Catholic, & (b) she reconciles with the Church through the Sacrament of Reconciliation. At that point is a Nuptial Mass needed, or are they just back in the good Graces of the Church w/o further action… Can she get back in the Church w/o him becoming Catholic? I know that a Catholic is required to follow the Catholic form of marriage, but I don’t know if there is more than one way to do that. (even thought I should know this) Please Help.

 

[Elizabeth_B]

The fact that the bride is Catholic and the groom is a non-Catholic Christian does not prevent them from being married during the Mass. I have attended many such weddings.

I believe it is also possible for the couple to receive a dispensation for a non-Catholic minister to perform the ceremony. In this case the Church recognizes the validity of the marriage.

 

[dhgray]

Elizabeth B.:

The fact that the bride is Catholic and the groom is a non-Catholic Christian does not prevent them from being married during the Mass. I have attended many such weddings.

I believe it is also possible for the couple to receive a dispensation for a non-Catholic minister to perform the ceremony. In this case the Church recognizes the validity of the marriage.

I was the groom in such a wedding. We had what is called a 1/2 mass (no communion). A visiting minister can assist but you have to have a catholic priest/descon there too.

 

[puzzleannie]

the nuptial Mass is not required for anyone who gets married in that Catholic Church. It is an option. The Catholic form of marriage in front of a priest or deacon is required, inside or outside Mass. Both parties must be free to marry and have no impediment in canon or natural law. The Catholic requires a dispensation to marry a non-Catholic and must promise to baptize and raise their children as Catholics. The non-Catholic party must promise not to interfere with the Catholic spouse freely practicing her religion. Both must comply with Catholic teaching on marriage and family and be open to the fruits of marriage including and especially children.

If they marry outside the Church without a dispensation (assuming no prior marriage or other impediment) they are not married in the eyes of the Church, they would have to request convalidation, that is, have the marriage blessed by exchanging vows in front of the priest or deacon according to the Catholic rite for marriage. No Mass is required.

For pastoral reasons, it is strongly discouraged for Catholic to marry a non-Catholic with a nuptial Mass, because automatically half the guests, including one partner, are excluded from communion, hardly a good sign of Christian unity.

you can easily answer all such questions by going to your parish and making an appointment with the priest or deacon in charge of marriage preparation. allow at least 6 months before your planned wedding date.

 

[mommy]

I was not baptised (husband Catholic), and we still had a full wedding mass. It was just not considered sacramental. When I complete RCIA this year, our marriage will then be considered sacramental.

 

[SMHW]

Kendall:

Suppose a young lady who is Catholic, (not a perfect Catholic, but Catholic, nonetheless), is engaged to a baptized evangelical protestant who is somewhat open to the Church, but feels pressure from home, just as the Catholic girl does.

Just to elaborate on what’s already been said…

The couple can also get a dispensation to be married in the church of the non-Catholic party by the minister of that church. A Catholic priest or deacon may be present and I think give a talk or blessing but may not officiate.

The couple would still have to complete whatever marriage preparation is required in her diocese/parish and would presumably have to meet whatever requirements the non-Catholic church places on them.

 

[pazdziernik]

mommy:

I was not baptised (husband Catholic), and we still had a full wedding mass. It was just not considered sacramental. When I complete RCIA this year, our marriage will then be considered sacramental.

Jesus Christ elevated natural marriage to a Sacrament. Baptism is the door to all the other Sacraments. Therefore, a Sacramental marriage can only exist between a baptized man and a baptized woman. As far as I understand, the natural marriage that you describe will become Sacramental when you are baptized. It will not be “considered” sacramental but will actually be sacramental in reality.

 

[puzzleannie]

the young lady and gentlemen in this hypothetical case should, as previous poster suggests, contact their parish priest for a full, candid discussion of their situation, and to complete required marriage preparation classes and counselling. Especially since they are contemplating marriage in a very conflicted family situation.

 

[Kendall]

I believe that a visit w/ one of the Parish Priests is in order as you say. Unfortunately, in our area, and I assume others as well, it depends on which Priest you talk to. There are some within the Church rendering very liberal interpretations of the Church’s Teaching, and therein lies the confusion. That’s part of the reason for the inquiry. I sometimes wonder if, at times, there may be some “Priest shopping” going on.

Bless you for your (name removed by moderator)ut,

kendall

 

[Andreas_Hofer]

SMHW:

Just to elaborate on what’s already been said…

The couple can also get a dispensation to be married in the church of the non-Catholic party by the minister of that church. A Catholic priest or deacon may be present and I think give a talk or blessing but may not officiate.

The couple would still have to complete whatever marriage preparation is required in her diocese/parish and would presumably have to meet whatever requirements the non-Catholic church places on them.

The legislation regarding that dispensation, however, says that it is meant for instances when the Protestant spouse holds some position of leadership within his/her church, such as a Presbyterian elder. While I’m not sure how exclusive the dispensation is, the spirit of the law is definitely for marriage by Catholic clergy.

 

[pazdziernik]

Kendall:

I believe that a visit w/ one of the Parish Priests is in order as you say. Unfortunately, in our area, and I assume others as well, it depends on which Priest you talk to. There are some within the Church rendering very liberal interpretations of the Church’s Teaching, and therein lies the confusion. That’s part of the reason for the inquiry. I sometimes wonder if, at times, there may be some “Priest shopping” going on.

Bless you for your (name removed by moderator)ut,

kendall

Ken, (may I call you Ken?)
I know my parish priest very well. There are instances in which he can’t officiate at a wedding because of his conscience. He judges in conscience that the marriage should not proceed for the time being for reasons other than validity/invalidity, dispensations, and so forth. Other priests judge otherwise, all things being equal. Pastoral care in marriage preparation includes factors other than “legality” per se. I know of instances in which a couple simply went to another priest to be married after my pastor said that he could not officiate in conscience. Please consider this as well when thinking about “priest shopping.” It’s not always about “interpretation of ecclesial teachings.”