Marriage question

[markb62]

My wife and I were married in a chapel in Las Vegas 17 years ago. We are both baptized Catholics, however she has formally said she is no longer Catholic. She is agnostic.

We have 2 children, ages 16 and 14. They have both been baptized, received the sacrament of reconcilliation and communion.

My wife does not understand why being married in the Catholic Church is important. She has a rather negative view of any organized religion. I no longer want to be married to my wife, but am unable to leave right now because of finances and the kids. If we do not have sexual relations, am I living in sin? This marriage has me depressed and I am quite often in a bad mood. Any advice would be appreciated.

 

[marty1818]

I would suggest posting on the Ask an Apologist forum. I am not really sure on this question. Sorry.

matt

 

[jaralenio]

Were you married by a Catholic priest?

 

[SMHW]

Well, ideally, you and your wife would decide that you do want to be married and that you will to have your marriage convalidated. That would be best for the whole family. Obviously that is not entirely within your power. What you can do is pray, pray, pray…

You say you no longer want to be married. I don’t know if it is because of your wife’s view on the Church or because of other reasons. You don’t say how your wife feels about it. If she wishes to be married then I think you need to do everything in your power to convince her how important being married in the Church is important to you.

But at the moment, your marriage is not considered valid by the Church anyway, so going to confession then living as ‘brother and sister’ by avoiding sexual relations would be the proper thing to do. Then you would not be ‘living in sin’.

 

[Michels]

markb62:

My wife and I were married in a chapel in Las Vegas 17 years ago. We are both baptized Catholics, however she has formally said she is no longer Catholic. She is agnostic.
.

My advice is also to pray for her. God can work on her heart, and will. You should be an example for you kids and show them that being Catholic is important to you by your actions.

I would also like to point out that once you are Catholic, you are always Catholic. Just like you can’t become unbaptised by willing it, you can’t be unconfirmed. The Church teaches that at baptism and confirmation that an indelible mark is placed on the soul which can never be undone or redone. (ccc 1121) A better term for someone who has left the Church is a non-practicing Catholic.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

markb62:

My wife and I were married in a chapel in Las Vegas 17 years ago. We are both baptized Catholics, however she has formally said she is no longer Catholic. She is agnostic.

We have 2 children, ages 16 and 14. They have both been baptized, received the sacrament of reconcilliation and communion.

My wife does not understand why being married in the Catholic Church is important. She has a rather negative view of any organized religion. I no longer want to be married to my wife, but am unable to leave right now because of finances and the kids. If we do not have sexual relations, am I living in sin? This marriage has me depressed and I am quite often in a bad mood. Any advice would be appreciated.

Do you and your children attend Mass every Sunday? If so continue, if not start doing so. She needs to see that the practice of your Catholci Faith is very important to you and the children. They will be preparing for Confirmation soon, working with them on this preparation and maybe even getting involved in the parish if you are not already, will also help.

If we do not have sexual relations, am I living in sin?

I assume from your post that you did not obtain permission from your Bishop to Marry outside the Catholic Canonical requirements, so your Marriage is defective in Form.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

Michels:

My advice is also to pray for her. God can work on her heart, and will. You should be an example for you kids and show them that being Catholic is important to you by your actions.

I would also like to point out that once you are Catholic, you are always Catholic. Just like you can’t become unbaptised by willing it, you can’t be unconfirmed. The Church teaches that at baptism and confirmation that an indelible mark is placed on the soul which can never be undone or redone. (ccc 1121) A better term for someone who has left the Church is a non-practicing Catholic.

There is no such thing as “Once Catholic , always Catholic” Once Baptized always Baptized, yes. Being Catholic is not something you become. It is something you choose to live as. If you formally renounce the Catholic Faith, you are no longer Catholic. In order to return you must formally profess your faith and belief in the Catholic Church.

 

[puzzleannie]

there is no way anybody on this anonymous forum can help you. this is a question that requires the pastoral guidance of the priest in confession, and the services of a Catholic marriage counsellor.