Mass Intentions

[ridesawhitehors]

Ok - I want to start out by saying that I really love my priest, and I pray for him all the time, and he is pretty orthodox. He is also …ummmm, ‘quirky’ may be the word, he is also kind of grouchy and controlling. He is quite orthodox, but he isn’t very spiritual, or very pastoral with his flock. Case in point:

Last night before mass, I politely approached him with a request that he offer the mass for the repose of the soul of a loved one who recently died. I had the request and name clearly written on a note and handed it to him. He very quickly glanced at it, said “Sure”, and immediatly tore it up and put it in the wastebasket as I was walking out. My impression was that he didn’t read it. I know he knew what I wanted. Mass began 15 minutes later.
And then he never mentioned my request before, during, or after the mass.

What do you think? Does he have to mention the name in order for the mass to be offered for my deceased loved one? Did he or I handle this improperly? I was left confused and a little hurt. Sometimes my priest is not very nice. But he is always orthodox.

 

[Loren_1of6]

This is tough, but I like to think that priests are people, too. Some priests like being around other people, others prefer to be alone. Some priests are shepherds who know their sheep, and some are excellent administrators. Some priests are friendly to everyone, others are sulen and gruff. This is what we call personality.

Having a priest with a less than personable personality can be tough for those of us who would like to be friends with the man who represents Jesus to our families. Keep praying for him, and let God take care of his personality.

As far as Mass intentions go, in our parish the priest has a waiting list of intentions. I called the office when my grandfather died in December to have a Mass said for the reppose of his soul. I was told that all of the Masses were “booked” until the middle of February; this included daily Masses. They went ahead and scheduled the Mass for my grandfather in February and sent me a card to remind me when it would be. They also print the Mass intentions in the bulletin.

 

[jpjd]

Maybe he was expecting a stipend with the request. Although, I don’t think he can deny a request just because it didn’t come with a stipend.

Your priest may be orthodox, but he sure doesn’t show much Christian charity.

I think you should hold him accountable for his actions and ask him why he ripped up the note, and when he plans to honor your request for a Mass offering. In our parish, all Mass offerings are scheduled and printed in the bulletin. That way, all requests are accounted for.

 

[JimG]

ridesawhitehors:

What do you think? Does he have to mention the name in order for the mass to be offered for my deceased loved one?

To answer this question: No, the name of the person for whom a Mass is being offered does not need to be mentioned, or even written in the bulletin, for the Mass intention to be validly offered.

 

[rwoehmke]

When I want to include someone’s intention in my prayers, I may say to the Lord or think it if you will,“When ever I pray this week, this month or whenever include this intention.” Now each time I pray during the week or month is that person’s intention not included because I do not raise the issue over and over again? God certainly remembers my intent. I would think that your priest could include the requested intention in his Mass in a similar fashion without needing to keep and have your note at hand.

 

[LilyM]

Exactly - when I pray for people on here I simply say ‘I offer this for all the people on CAF’ - I don’t think I need to name you all or anything.

 

[geojack]

The priest does not have to mention the name.

The person that pays gets no special role.

The word stipend is no longer used.

we were told that this is the right way and that we were doing it wrong all these years.

 

[ridesawhitehors]

Thanks for your responses.
I guess from now on I will take a more formal approach by going to the parish secretary who bosses our priest around all the time and gets results.
I guess I just don’t know the usual protocol for mass intentions. Our parish is small and sort of informal about some things. And i have heard Father mention such intentions before at the lector when there was no mention in the bulliten. (This was a daily mass anyway).
And I have been told in the past that Father WILL NOT accept an offering for mass intentions.

I didn’t expect any special favors or anything. I just wondered WHAT to expect. And wondered if despite my confusion, and Father’s actions… if the mass REALLY was offered for my loved one?
My priest’s behaviour confused me regarding the deal. Oh well.