Masturbation and carelessness

[AlbMagno]

Hello, I am a teen struggling with masturbation and now I am on a rare streak of abstinence. It’s all good, I am more sociable and I am not always ashamed. However, there is a big issue: I lost some respect for God.

When I fail and masturbate more regularly, normally I seem to have more devotion to praying and adoring God (doing “pious things”), but when I am in a streak, I don’t feel the same authorative presence of God, and I have trouble praying to him with humility (or praying at all). It seems to me that my brain stops thinking that God is king. Maybe it’s scrupulosity, but to me this is bad, as I can’t make a sincere conection with him save when I really need something.

It seems that this is caused because abstinence from porn and masturbation (supposedly) increase the levels of dopamine and androgenic receptors and acetylcholine, making me more independant and “masculine”, but this also makes me feel some kind of IDGAF attitude about God that I don’t like…

 

[Guest1]

Don’t go by feelings. (Not saying you are)

The fact that you’re aware of the negative feelings or thoughts is great. Try to if you can ignore it and go deeper in Catholic faith (listening or reading the bible for example) remember there is the devil. what if he’s putting a dark rainy cloud over you when you keep yourself?

But hey it could be just your flesh. shrug

Either way you don’t have to listen to it.

 

[TK421]

Devotion to God is determined by what you say and do, not by what you feel.

Devotion increases as prayer becomes more habitual.

A normal human being goes through mood swings of relative highs and relative lows.

Congratz on your progress.

Peace.

 

[AlbMagno]

Thanks for the replies! Yes, I know that in Catholic Theology actions are superior to feelings, maybe I should force me a bit to increase my prayer life. And this lack of Fear of God may also be exaggerated by the Devil, as you say.

 

[guanophore]

When I fail and masturbate more regularly, normally I seem to have more devotion to praying and adoring God (doing “pious things”)

I can’t make a sincere conection with him save when I really need something.

It is a fact that awareness of our sins also brings us more awareness of our dependence on God. It is not about “doing pious things”, though, it is about a relationship. It is about hurting the one you love, and who gave His life for you.

makes me feel some kind of IDGAF attitude about God that I don’t like

It is great that you have such keen awareness of this dynamic. This is a very important spiritual discernment that only a sensitive soul can grasp. This is the part of masturbation that is spiritually enslaving. When we feed into the desires of the flesh, it will always drive a wedge between us and God. Satan loves to widen that wedge, by getting us to think that we will “feel” more right with God if we just give in to the flesh.

It is a spiritual battleground, and it is important that you not go on “feelings”.

 

[Shakuhachi]

When you fail it humbles you and you know you need God’s mercy.

 

[RandomAlias]

When you are good – and by the way, that is awesome, well done! – don’t think you did it all by yourself and take all the credit. Give thanks and praise to God for giving you the grace to avoid sin and live in virtue.

That’s what I do. When I sin, I pray “Jesus help me,” and when I don’t sin, I pray “Thank you, Jesus!”

 

[Seagull]

This topic - has already been discussed.

 

[TheLittleLady]

“Pride goes before a fall”.

Make prayer a habit. Pray every night before you sleep (I will always suggest the Liturgy of the Hours “Night Prayers” as they have a rhythm and you know you are praying with millions of others across the world and across time) Take 1 minute pray every morning before you get out of bed, briefly thank God for this day of life and dedicate every thing you do that day to Him.