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244Rocket
Guest
Praying hard for you.


Thank you for the update; that’s great that you’ll soon have your own apartment.Thank you, everyone.
I talked with my psychiatric social worker today and she says she thinks the rapid cycling mood swings lately are being caused by situational stress. I do have a disorder (Schizoaffective) but in terms of that I’m stable thanks to the meds I’m on (no paranoid delusions, long manic or depressed episodes)
This seems to be more about my living situation. I live with my sister and brother in law. I am on disability even though I’m only 21. I did live with my mom in another state but she passed away a few months ago from cancer. That was really hard to deal with and still is.
Then I moved here to stay with them for a couple months until I can get my own apartment. My brother in-law who is a recovering alcoholic informed me the other day that he started drinking again. I feel at least partly responsible, the stress from me moving here has caused some tension between us.
It doesn’t help that he has his own mental health issues like PTSD from being a retired marine and his moods are as unpredictable as mine but mine are usually in response to him. When he’s in a bad mood I feel like it’s my fault and feel very awkward.
I am moving out into my own apartment on June 1st.
I decided that I’m not going to worry about his moods or drinking problem anymore it just stresses me out and makes me feel like a burden,
Suicide felt like the only way out but I have 2 cats that I absolutely adore and couldn’t leave them and don’t trust anyone else to take care of them. It wouldn’t be fair to them either, I’m sure they have been stressed from moving to another state and my mom passing away since they were close with her too. I know this all may sound silly but they mean a lot to me. They were the reason I went into the hospital a few weeks ago when I tried to kill myself by overdosing.
EDIT: to clarify they weren’t the reason I tried to kill myself, they came up to me and started purring and rubbing on me after I took a bottle of pills and I felt bad so I went to the ER
I’m going to try to cope with things.
I have a place to stay and am thankful for that.
Prayers continuing for you…

Father in Heaven:Prayer to Saint Dymphna:
I turn to you, dear virgin and martyr, confident of your power with God and of your
willingness to take my cause into your hands. I praise and bless the Lord for giving
you to us as patron of the nervous and emotionally disturbed. I firmly hope that
through your kind intercession He will restore my lost serenity and peace of mind.
May He speak to my heart and reassure me: “My peace I give you. Let not your heart
be troubled nor let it be afraid.” Pray for me, dear St. Dymphna, that my nervous
and emotional turmoil may cease, and that I may again know serenity and personal
peace.
Amen.

Prayers continuing for you…




