Miserable!

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Help2

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I AM VERY MISERABLE WITH THIS MAN!! I pray that i can get out of this relationship SOON! He is LAZY, and expects me to cook, clean, serve him, and then pick up after him too!!
I CANT TAKE ANYMORE of this PSYCHOTIC CRYING in my home!
Oh, what is it called when he has EXXXXTREME MOOD SWINGS??
1 minute he is laughing, the next minute he is SERIOUS, followed by madness, followed by an EXTREME high of joking, followed by hurtful feelings and then in tears, then ANGRY, and then REALLY HUMBLE and HOLY all in a time of 10 minutes???
I need God to remove this man from my life. Im DEPRESSED :"( did i mention that he is a MAJOR CRY BABY???
 
We’re behind you. Hang in there, and find your way out ASAP. Misguided religion acts like that, but holiness does not. Holiness would stop doing this to you.
 
My prayers also, that you will respect yourself enough to get out of this ‘relationship’.
Your have the right to find someone with whom you can share happiness and peace. and who will be a balanced father to your future children. Marriage is a long time and whatever attracts you to him is likely to fade in the years ahead. The bad only gets worse with time.
God preserve you from the sense that you just have to settle for someone who makes you miserable, and God grant that you will care enough about your future children to escape from this relationship.
Whatever you find attractive in this man and however needy and fearful you won’t find someone else, it is not healthy to stay in this relationship as you describe.

May God give you healing, wisdom, strength and good judgement, and the wisdom and strength to recover from the damage this relationship has already caused you. Clearly, it’s not helping him. He sounds too ill or damaged perhaps, yet stronger than you even so.
If you choose to stay, then you are choosing a miserable present and future for yourself, with no one else to blame. If he carries on with tears and emotional blackmail, don’t give in as of course he’s likely to do that, given what you’ve described. Please save yourself. He needs help but you seem cast as victim of his illness.

You say, “I need God to remove this man from my life.” That’s only a part of it. YOU need to act, to move out of this man’s life. God requires our choice and action. We have to take responsibility for our choices.

Best wishes for a happier future with a good loving man.
 
We’re behind you. Hang in there, and find your way out ASAP. Misguided religion acts like that, but holiness does not. Holiness would stop doing this to you.
 
Do you have family nearby???

Go to you parent’s house ASAP and write him a letter afterwards telling him that you want him out of the house.
 
Help2 if you are a real person and not a virtual creation, both you and your fiancé need to go directly into psychiatric care. Do not get married, please do not have children.
 
Cat said:
**Many of us have already given you advice to leave this abusive situation, but you called us emissaries of Satan. **

What do you want us to say?! What makes things different this time?! So far, you are telling us the same story, and so far, we are giving you the same advice. **Will you listen to us this time? ** I can assure you that Satan is not using any of us to try to deceive you, but since you don’t know me or any of us from Adam, you probably don’t believe me or any of these other wise and experienced women.

But just in case you are willing to listen this time: Leave your fiance in God’s hands, and get out as soon as possible, within the next few hours if you can. You are in a dangerous situation.
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Cat said it so well on your last thread.

So, what are you going to do?

Put up with it? Or deal with it.
 
Do not allow this man to brainwash you into staying with him. If not for anything else, leave this abusive environment for your child’s sake. These threats are a tool he is using to manipulate you. And if you truly are frightened for your safety then you need to get help now, even legal help if necessary. Do you have any relatives or close friends who have a place you can retreat to?

You’re in my prayers.
 
Just leave! If it’s your house, get a lawyer and have him evicted. Period. Sorry you are going through that, but just leave, go anywhere while you have his butt evicted from your home. Do not stay with a mad man. 😦 Don’t make yourself crazy trying to stay with him.
 
Reading all your other posts in this and an earlier thread, and observing your very recognition acceptance of others’ urgent and kindly advice, it does seem that it may be unlikely that you will choose to evict this man, nor that he would make it easy for you, rather that he would emotionally blackmail you and confuse you, a conclusion I draw from what you have posted.

Therefore I beg God to protect your children and any future children you have with this man. These children will be in a very unhealthy and harmful atmosphere, of an unhappy and controlled mother, and an emotionally unstable father as is abundantly evident from your posts.

While you have a choice, these children do not. May God keep them safe.
Lord have mercy on them.
 
Correction of my last post:

Reading all your other posts in this and an earlier thread, and observing your very limited acceptance of others’ urgent and kindly advice, it does seem that it may be unlikely that you will choose to evict this man, nor that he would make it easy for you, rather that he would emotionally blackmail you and confuse you, a conclusion I draw from what you have posted.

Therefore I beg God to protect your children and any future children you have with this man. These children will be in a very unhealthy and harmful atmosphere, of an unhappy and controlled mother, and an emotionally unstable father as is abundantly evident from your posts.

While you have a choice, these children do not. May God keep them safe.
Lord have mercy on them.
 
Hi Help2,

I’ve read your last thread and this one and I am so sorry that you are going through this situation. I really don’t feel qualified to give you advice and I certainly don’t want to give you advice that put’s you and your daughter in further danger.

Like the others I hope and pray that you leave as soon as possible,this situation is definitely not normal.

Also I would try to find out (prehaps someone on here might know) if moving in with family and friends is a good idea as he will more likely know where you are staying or to look to go into some form of hiding i.e. a shelter.
 
Help2 said:
I need God to remove this man from my life.
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As you’ve been told before, in other threads, YOU need to remove this man from your life. This situation is too dangerous, you can’t sit around and wait for a “miracle.” God expects us to use our common sense and to help ourselves.
 
agnes_therese said:
As you’ve been told before, in other threads, YOU need to remove this man from your life. This situation is too dangerous, you can’t sit around and wait for a “miracle.” God expects us to use our common sense and to help ourselves.
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Help2, I think what agnes wrote here is really important to remember!
 
I’ve skimmed a few of your threads. I agree with much of what the other posters have said about finding a safe way to leave him/kick him out, but I won’t repeat it. I’d like to take a different approach.

Please carefully consider your fiance and his actions in light of these two passages of scripture:
Now the works of the flesh are obvious: immorality, impurity, licentiousness, idolatry, sorcery, hatreds, rivalry, jealousy, outbursts of fury, acts of selfishness, dissensions, factions, occasions of envy, drinking bouts, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. In contrast, the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. Now those who belong to Christ [Jesus] have crucified their flesh with its passions and desires.If we live in the Spirit, let us also follow the Spirit. Gal 5:19-25
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And
A good tree does not bear rotten fruit, nor does a rotten tree bear good fruit. For every tree is known by its own fruit. For people do not pick figs from thorn bushes, nor do they gather grapes from brambles. A good person out of the store of goodness in his heart produces good, but an evil person out of a store of evil produces evil; for from the fullness of the heart the mouth speaks. Luke 6:43-45
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The answer is simple: Leave, and leave now. If is is your home, tell him to leave, and if he doesn’t, have the police removed him.

By your actions, you are allowing him to abuse you, and encouraging his controlling behavior. This is not only dangerous to you, but your children, who you should be thinking about and protecting first and foremost. Stop complaining, take control of your life, and stop handing that control over to others.

After you two are separated, please seek counseling.
 
Everyone here has unanimously told you to leave. You are being abused by this man. Please listen to us. Please call the police, get him out of your home, and start to figure out how life is supposed to feel.

I’m going to repeat this again: GET AWAY FROM HIM.

He does not love you, he is mentally very sick, and he is taking everything out on you. He should not be threatening suicide, and you should never ever feel miserable and afraid in a loving relationship.

You and your child do not deserve this.
 
I wish and pray that i had the courage to leave or call authorities to file a restraining order. Things have gotten worse. The worse part is that im confused and still question if the feedback im getting on this website is even valid. I keep trying to convince myself that the responses im getting on here could possibly be the enemy using others to destroy our relationship. He (my fiance) has told me that we are of Gods will but that Im allowing the enemy to take control in our home. Because i question his whereabouts, he feels that im accusing him, so he says i have no respect for him. So he gets angry that i disrespect him in that way. So he then blows up in much enragement and verbally assaults me and gets physical with himself, like banging his head on the wall. He says that IF I would take control of my doubts, then none of these actions would be happening. So with that said, he does prove a point. He says im the problem in the relationship. 😦
I cant seem to think clear or make out what is real and whats not anymore. Someone please talk to me. I feel like im going insane. :"(
 
My dear, this is what abusers do. The play with your mind and confuse you. They make you think that their behaviour is your fault. I’ve heard this referred to as “gaslighting.” See: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gaslighting It may help you to see a counselor you can trust to help you regain your sense of reality and the ability to trust yourself and your perceptions.

Please remember that no one (including you) is ever responsible for the actions that another takes of his own free will.

As for those of us on this forum working for the enemy, I promise you that he and I are not even on speaking terms 😛
Perhaps that was a bad joke, but seriously, most people don’t get any satisfaction out of breaking up engaged couples who are in healthy relationships.
 
Help2 said:
I wish and pray that i had the courage to leave or call authorities to file a restraining order. Things have gotten worse. The worse part is that im confused and still question if the feedback im getting on this website is even valid. I keep trying to convince myself that the responses im getting on here could possibly be the enemy using others to destroy our relationship. He (my fiance) has told me that we are of Gods will but that Im allowing the enemy to take control in our home. Because i question his whereabouts, he feels that im accusing him, so he says i have no respect for him. So he gets angry that i disrespect him in that way. So he then blows up in much enragement and verbally assaults me and gets physical with himself, like banging his head on the wall. He says that IF I would take control of my doubts, then none of these actions would be happening. So with that said, he does prove a point. He says im the problem in the relationship. 😦
I cant seem to think clear or make out what is real and whats not anymore. Someone please talk to me. I feel like im going insane. :"(
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Godly men do not threaten to commit a mortal sin (Suicide) to control people. So if you do not stay with him, he would cut himself off from God? And this man claims to know Gods will? How would all this sound to you if someone else was going through it and telling you about it? I will say a prayer for you. If you are having doubts, ask your fiancé to repeat what he tells you to a priest and see if the priest will tell you “Yeah, he is right”
 
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