But at the same time, if the guy is not getting positive feedback, he may decide that she isn’t interested and back off.
Yes, that is true. Plus if it’s someone like me, and the girl keeps saying no, and suddenly they become interested one day, it will stay ‘no’ from our side as well
Courting is about discerning marriage.
My wife and I agree that we don’t date someone we don’t know. However, my definition of a friend is someone that I know and I trust and is a fairly small subset of people. Her definition of friend is someone that she has met on a regular basis, which fits my idea of an acquaintance. So what she calls friends, I called acquaintance and we both agreed on the type of person we would date, it just took longer to get there. It was all a matter of semantics. Obviously we eventually found our way around our misunderstanding.
Well, that’s her position on campus, though she corrected us in the beginning by pointing out that a Catholic chaplain really is an ordained priest. On campus she’s associate chaplain.
Can’t always have it the way you want.I was always best at NOT interpreting ‘he likes me’ signals appropriately… as I’ve always preferred guys as friends… so I had opposite surprises
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Hah. And he would fall for you for that very thing. Just because you didn’t expect anything, he could fall for you. Makes sense? I believe it does.(I’d probably be the kind of gal to bring wine and a video and hope for a relaxing evening with a male friend… and not even CONSIDER ANYTHING else)
Because with a manual, it would be much worse.Why isn’t there a manual for this stuff?
Depends how you define friendship. If we don’t use a cap of shallowness, then not. Friends could be extremely attached back in the old day. These days if you wound up without a previous arrangement at a lady friend’s doorstep, it would be assumed you were hitting on her.
I used to degrade that rule in my thoughts and speech, but with a bit more experience, I understood at least a part of what made people make such a rule. Generally, friendships have it really difficult to survive the crash of a romance. Wonder if it ever truly is just friendship again or if it’s still a form of platonic love. Not even a desire of any physical kind whatsoever, but something secret and exclusive which exists only between the given two and never dies. Perhaps for this reason losing a romantic interest means losing a friend. This is perhaps why some people won’t take the risk.
Yeah, that’s what you would think… but no… that was definitely NOT the case.
Errr, sir, that’s mass… I’d have no compunctions kissing someone close to me on the cheek, but kissing someone out of the blue, especially if it’s not just cheek, wouldn’t be appropriate at mass. All the more so given he might be uncomfortable with it if he doesn’t have the kind of feelings for the Opening Poster, or especially if he already has a different object of his affections.
An affectionate kiss is not 1-1/2 levels from a handshake because it’s a romantic sign. You can shake hands with everyone, but you don’t swap “affectionate/appreciative” kiss with everyone unless it’s just on the cheek and you’re very outgoing. If the kiss is on the lips it must require consent and some reverence, not a surprise assault at mass, where one comes for different things.
Why do you make the distinction between adults and children if you maintain it’s just liking? If it were merely just liking, then it would be appropriate for children. Examination of intent is very much in order because kissing various people of the opposite gender on the lips on impulse is not the way a responsible adult should conduct himself. Your arguments could easily be extrapolated to justify “spin the bottle” as an innocent game because it’s for adults and for fun and it stops at kissing.
Yeah, now that you say, I tend to agree. Perhaps if he were treating you like a sister, that could happen too. I vaguely recall similar incidents in my life. People are much more affectionate than normal in such situations as what you described. In fact, I think the gesture is more brotherly than anything else, it’s just that one isn’t normally so close with female friends except the loved one, so she tends to be the only recipient except maybe the guy’s sisters. Well, at any rate, what’s sure is that he cares a lot.