And then me, being the well-meaning protector, steps in and makes it worse!I have to admit that I get angry a lot. I try not too, but after the 10th sibling fight or rude comment, I start to lose it.
Then I go to bed feeling guilty wishing I had more patience.
We all get angry at poor behavior. We all need to pray for more patience. That doesnât make you an angry person. We are all works in progress. I really dislike the tendency of our culture to label everyone. If they can label you, then they can put you on on a shelf, dismiss you and leave you there. The only label I accept these days is CATHOLIC. Okay, I also claim Mother and Wife.I have to admit that I get angry a lot. I try not too, but after the 10th sibling fight or rude comment, I start to lose it.
Then I go to bed feeling guilty wishing I had more patience.
I once confessed to my priest friend that I told my then 2 year old daughter to âshut upâ and you know what he said?We all get angry at poor behavior. We all need to pray for more patience. That doesnât make you an angry person. We are all works in progress. I really dislike the tendency of our culture to label everyone. If they can label you, then they can put you on on a shelf, dismiss you and leave you there. The only label I accept these days is CATHOLIC. Okay, I also claim Mother and Wife.
But that just goes back to my point. If mothers of young children are such angry people, why on earth would they identify with that role which supposedly makes them so angry to begin with? They wouldnât!
But we always want to renounce vice and cultivate virtue. And a âmea culpaâ attitude is healthy to have. But that does not mean that society is right to label someone according to our spiritual struggle.
Well, if I was a single mom w/young kids, Iâd be upset a lot of the time too. Itâs really hard when kids are toddlers/preschoolers and you donât have backup.
. There are ways to parent that do not involve yelling. We do not need to yell to make our kids behave! Please donât feel is inevitable; please donât feel like irritation or anger while parenting young children is inevitable.I think we all do our best not to yell at our kidsI canât not jump in
I do not hit my children. I do my best not to yell at all, and DS knows it - I apologize when I do and remind him and me that yelling is not how we speak to people or promote peace. He is three.
We are regularly complimented on their behavior, especially at Mass and in restaurants.
There are also all different kinds of children and all different kinds of families. What worked for me with my oldest when I had no other children has not worked with subsequent children or in a larger family setting. This is one of those areas of liberty in parenting. Sometimes, yelling is to stop a dangerous behavior. Sometimes it is because 3kids running around screaming are so loud the parent cannot otherwise be heard (âOy you crazy kids, stop and listen!â). Sometimes yelling is necessary because you are nine months preggo and cannot hop up fast enough to avoid danger. So ya scream. Sometimes you gotta yell to RESTORE the peace that your kids are disrupting.I canât not jump in
I do not hit my children. I do my best not to yell at all, and DS knows it - I apologize when I do and remind him and me that yelling is not how we speak to people or promote peace. He is three.
We are regularly complimented on their behavior, especially at Mass and in restaurants.
I think we all do our best not to yell at our kids
Yes, but most of the posts here have treated yelling as an inevitable function of parenting. Itâs not.
Thatâs great that you have found what works for your kids. Personally, though, I think you might have missed the point of the original post. Furthermore, I tend to take with a grain of salt advice from people with so few years experience at parenting.I canât not jump in
I do not hit my children. I do my best not to yell at all, and DS knows it - I apologize when I do and remind him and me that yelling is not how we speak to people or promote peace. He is three.
We are regularly complimented on their behavior, especially at Mass and in restaurants.
We do not need to view our children as adversaries who must be tamed. That seems the general tenor of most threads now, and itâs a sad assumption. I am not a perfect parent. But I do my best to be a peaceful one, even when my children are anything but.Thatâs great that you have found what works for your kids. Personally, though, I think you might have missed the point of the original post. Furthermore, I tend to take with a grain of salt advice from people with so few years experience at parenting.
Okay. But the term âyelling atâ does not always mean the same thing. Many times kids will say that they got âyelled atâ by an adult even when the adult never raised their voice. âYelled atâ is a term that has come to mean being scolded or told not to do something. This is not a bad thing, in and of itself, though parents should try to avoid losing their temper when they are correcting their kids and avoid raising their voices excessively. Being angry with a child doesnât automatically assume losing control of your temper and raising your voice. By the same token, there are instances when a parent literally does yell at a child, like when they call them in for dinner, without a hint of anger whatsoever.I canât not jump in
I do not hit my children. I do my best not to yell at all, and DS knows it - I apologize when I do and remind him and me that yelling is not how we speak to people or promote peace. He is three.
We are regularly complimented on their behavior, especially at Mass and in restaurants.
I donât think that yelling is an inevitable form of parenting, at least not in the sense of being out-of-control raising oneâs voice excessively. I only argue that being angry is an inevitable aspect of raising a child.
Lol, yes, like if you are changing one babyâs diaper and see another child in the distance doing something they need to stop right that moment. You yell. Or you need the help of your spouse, who is far away, and you cannot walk away from the scene. You yell. Yelling doesnât have to be the form of discipline, it might just be the only way you can get the person to hear the message at the moment you need them to hear it.
My mother told me the same thing a long time ago⌠now she admits that she might be part of the reason why most people mistakenly assume Iâm angry when I talk.
I have less years parenting, but was given an extremely difficult baby and toddler, so I think that bumped me up in the experience dept lol.Thatâs great that you have found what works for your kids. Personally, though, I think you might have missed the point of the original post. Furthermore, I tend to take with a grain of salt advice from people with so few years experience at parenting.