mormonism? & where is the star Kolob? How ludicrous is ludicrous????

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StLawrenceFan

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Please review what mormons believe.
This is just a partial list.
Quoted from HERE…

Add your comments later. (ahhem). Get Very serious.
Here it is: How ludicrous is ludicrous???

**

  1. *]God was once a man like us.
    *]God has a tangible body of flesh and bone.
    *]God lives on a planet near the star Kolob.
    *]God (“Heavenly Father”) has at least one wife, our “Mother in Heaven,” but she is so holy that we are not to discuss her nor pray to her.
    *]Jesus was married.
    *]We can become like God and rule over our own universe.
    *]There are many gods, ruling over their own worlds.
    *]Jesus and Satan (“Lucifer”) are brothers, and they are our brothers - we are all spirit children of Heavenly Father
    *]Jesus Christ was conceived by God the Father by having sex with Mary, who was temporarily his wife.
    *]We should not pray to Jesus, nor try to feel a personal relationship with him.

    **
 
YOU MUST BELIEVE IN JOE’S MYTH
BECAUSE MAGIC UNDWEAR IS THE NEW GPS SYSTEM!!

btw…everyone knows that Joe’s Myths cannot be proven with ANY archaeological or anthropological facts or reasoning **WHATSOEVER. **

**NADA; ZILCH, NOTHING, MINUS ZERO. **

NOTHINGNESS.

morMons have every right to practice their “religion”. No issues.

But they have NO right to call themselves Christian; none whatsoever. That’s just a fact.
 
gurneyhalleck1 said:
Kolob? It sounds like the name of some Klingon Commander? Commander Kolob!😛

http://fremenalex.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/klingon.jpg
Click to expand...
Yep…!

But mormons believe “god” lives there. . Have you ever heard of anything so ludicrous?

I think mormons mean “guru”.

I wonder if thats the kitchen spill guru of ShamWow that lives on Kolob? Now that would make sense to some!

Meanwhile, let’s call the whole thing nuttier than a nut bar.

Hey, speaking of “bar”…Jose Smith had a Bar in his HOUSE!
 
StLawrenceFan said:
Yep…!

But mormons believe “god” lives there. . Have you ever heard of anything so ludicrous?

I think mormons mean “guru”.

I wonder if thats the kitchen spill guru of ShamWow that lives on Kolob? Now that would make sense to some!

Meanwhile, let’s call the whole thing nuttier than a nut bar.

Hey, speaking of “bar”…Jose Smith had a Bar in his HOUSE!
Click to expand...
Did you ever read about Smith getting arrested and tried in court for his peep stone gazing antics? I also like the time when he bought that Egyptian sarcophogus with a mummy and scroll inside. He said he’d “interpret and translate” the papyrus scroll…according to the “prophet” it was a scroll detailing the lost tales of Abraham, his adventures that aren’t in the Bible…

In the 1970’s real egyptologists translated this badboy and the scroll actually is a BURIAL EMBALMING guide!! lol…way to go Joe! lol
 
gurneyhalleck1 said:
Did you ever read about Smith getting arrested and tried in court for his peep stone gazing antics? I also like the time when he bought that Egyptian sarcophogus with a mummy and scroll inside. He said he’d “interpret and translate” the papyrus scroll…according to the “prophet” it was a scroll detailing the lost tales of Abraham, his adventures that aren’t in the Bible…

In the 1970’s real egyptologists translated this badboy and the scroll actually is a BURIAL EMBALMING guide!! lol…way to go Joe! lol
Click to expand...
-That’s for sure. The Egyptians had a lot of guffffaws over Joe’s Myth and his goofball psuedo-translations. What a trainwreck of guesses and dreams.

[Joseph Smith had a bar in his home (Mansion House), and a liquor license to distribute and sell alcohol."]Joe should have just continued to sell Beer from his home and NEVER told his sheep followers that they couldn’t drink Beer. ](http://www.mormonismi.info/jamesdavid/postin13.htm)

Another ludicrous rule.

Putz.

THE JOSEPPI SMITH STATUE!

http://davidbyrne.typepad.com/.a/6a00d834555ca169e201157188be50970b-800wi
 
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