My Father Forces Me To Go To Communion

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JohnStrachan

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This may sound totally ridiculous, but it is true. Ten years ago I left the RC Church and began worshipping and practicing as an Anglican. From time to time I do attend RC mass - mass intentions, funerals, sacraments for my kids, midnight mass, etc. When ever I am attending church with my father, he expects me to go to communion. This may seem rather odd on his part as he is very faithful in his practice.

I don’t think it is right - out of respect - for me to receive communion, and yet he insists. Once, I went up and received a blessing and experienced a strong rebuke from him. So I’m at a loss. In the interest of family peace, I receive communion, but in my heart I mean no disrespect to Roman Catholics.

Any thoughts?
 
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Could you talk to him before you go to Mass, and explain you won’t be receiving Communion? Don’t wait until the moment he expects you to go up, preempt him. Talk to him, explain your reasoning, and once you get to the part where he expects you to go, say “Dad, we talked about this. I don’t want to disrespect your religion by taking Communion when I know I shouldn’t. I’m happy to go for a blessing but I’m not taking Communion”.
 
Lou2U said:
Could you talk to him before you go to Mass, and explain you won’t be receiving Communion
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We’ve had this conversation. I’ve made it clear that according to the RC church it is a grave sin to attend church under the stain of mortal sin. He seems to believe however that if I go to communion then somehow it’s an indication that I haven’t left the RC church.
 
You are just going to have to be the adult and stay in the pew. Or don’t sit with him.

He can’t actually make you receive communion and if he makes a scene, that’s on him. If he tries to berate you, walk away.
 
If you have to attend occasionally, tell him beforehand that you are not practicing, so you will not be receiving. End of.
 
I converted to Catholicism a couple years ago. If my parents forced me to take communion at their church I would say almost exactly this:

“Mom/dad I know you want me to be in the denomination you raised me in. However I am not and I’m demanding that you respect that. So, either you will 1) Stop demanding that I receive communion or 2) I will never go to church with you again. I would prefer 1), but it’s up to you.”
 
Ask him what his priest has to say about it. That might be a bit strong, but a priest may get through on the message better than you can.

ETA:
My family and I were in the reverse position once at an in-law’s Baptist Church. When ushers came around with their communion tray, I simply waived my hand politely and said, “No thank you, we’re visitors.” They looked at us blankly for a moment (because they have open communion) and started to move on, but then my wife’s aunt caused a scene in the church during the service. I simply said that we don’t belong to that church and didn’t feel comfortable participating in a symbol of their community. Everyone quieted down and went on, no one else said anymore (fortunately) except the aunt who continued to rant for a few days. She now knows better than to bring it up.
 
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JohnStrachan said:
I’ve made it clear that according to the RC church it is a grave sin to attend church under the stain of mortal sin
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You probably just misspoke, but as I’ve always been taught it’s only a sin to receive communion. In fact Catholics are expected to be at mass regardless of their state of grace on days of obligation. That restriction would put people in a situation where every option is a sin.
 
Schedule a meeting with your dad, his priest and you. Do this far in advance of the next “go to Mass with dad” event.

If he refuses to go, then, prior to next required Mass, tell dad “I am not properly disposed to receive Communion today/tonight”.
 
Are you a grown man? If you have kids of your own, I am assuming you are. “No thank you.” is a complete sentence. I suggest you start using it.
 
JohnStrachan said:
Ten years ago I left the RC Church and began worshipping and practicing as an Anglican.
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Could I ask you , why did you do that? What did you think Anglicanism could offer you that the Catholic Church can’t?
 
You mean no disrespect to Catholics yet you knowingly commit what we consider sacrilege? Yeah, OK. Sorry if this sounds too blunt but I think you need to man up and tell your father in no uncertain terms that you will not be receiving communion unless and until you find yourself actually in communion with the Church again. You’re an adult. Your father cannot force you to do anything you truly don’t want to do.
 
No disrespect intended, but I don’t think your father truly knows what it means to receive the Eucharist in the Catholic Church.

A lot of Catholics don’t really know the Eucharist and it’s significance, which is a shame.

You can have the priest talk and educate him on this.

If he still insists, you can put your foot down and refuse.
 
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