Natural Family Planing: God Condoned or Contraception?

[MYSTERIOUS_An-D]

I have been told by numerous Catholics that contraception is something that goes against everything that God teaches us about a healthy sexual relationship. However, I am a bit confused on why NFP isn’t considered contraception. Perhaps my logic is skewed, so please clarify.

The reason I question whether NFP is contraception is because it is using a barrier to prevent the pregnancy. I understand that it isn’t a physical or chemical one, but in this instance time becomse the barrier. Now, I have heard the argument that waiting is ok because it is natural, but the chemicals that are ingested come from natural sources. The other argument that I have heard is that it is ok because you are abstaining from the act which gives more time for God. To this I would say that the act of abstinence is done for selfish reasons and has nothing to do with giving God glory.

 

[Lorik]

When use use contraception you tell God “No, I will not cooperate in bringing life to the world.” When you use NFP you tell God “We really can’t have a baby right now but if it your will we trust you.”

 

[Poisson]

Two thoughts:
1 - the chemicals in question are also abortifacients meaning they are designed to create a hostile environment for an embryo.
2 - With NFP you are working with the natural cycles that God provided. With chemicals you are forcing your body to do something God never intended.
I heard someone once say (sorry I don’t remember who) that using artificial contraception is the same a chewing on the eucharist and spitting it out. You accept part of the sacrament and reject what you don’t like.

 

[aeddyblouin]

Hi Mysterious, Although we are very committed to NFP, my husband and I have also struggled with this question. The fact that God created fertle and infertle times, and also made these times discernable through physical observation helps to assure me that we are still withing God’s plan when we are postponing pregnancy.

In our country it is especially easy to succumb to the “contraceptive mentality” while using NFP. In our marriage we have really grown into a deep trust the God’s plan–so although we have postponed pregnancy, it is a decision that is made month to month, through prayer. Our current pregnancy is the result of us both feeling strongly that we were being called to conceive another child, even though it didn’t fit into the PLAN I had envisioned (namely the weaning of my toddler before another pregnancy).

Janet Smith has edited a book titled “Why Humane Vitea was Right”. It has many essays on the topic of NFP, and how it differs from contraception. Also the Couple to Couple League (ccli.org) has some very good information.

I also remind myself that the Catechism teaches responsible parenthood. Even in our wealthy country there are families who will reach a point at which they have serious reason to limit their family size. It is a blessing that we can do this without leaving the teachings of the Church.

Good luck in your search.

 

[jc413]

MYSTERIOUS An-D:

I have been told by numerous Catholics that contraception is something that goes against everything that God teaches us about a healthy sexual relationship. However, I am a bit confused on why NFP isn’t considered contraception.

Mysterious, I wonder, have you spoken to a good orthodox priest about this? I completely understand that there are couples who do not practice NFP, because they are not called to do so. However, I do NOT understand why anyone would actually believe that NFP goes against what God teaches us about a healthy sexual relationship. Your statement implies that the Church thus encourages couples to practice something that is contrary to the Lord’s will. I, for one, would not be very uneasy with this implication and would question anyone who put the Church’s teaching in this light.

You will get many and varied responses to your question, as NFP is certainly a “hot button” issue among Catholics. I urge you to go beyond this forum and read what the Church truly teaches about this matter. Read Christopher West’s book *The Good News About Sex and Marriage.*Talk to several orthodox priests.

As far as the basic difference between contraception and NFP: as West says, it is the same difference between abortion and miscarriage. One is an act of man, one is an act of God. Each and every time those who practice NFP are intimate, they are open to life. With contraception, this is merely not true.

It is hyper-pious to believe that intimacy within marriage is reserved exclusively for procreation. That is simply not true, and not what the Church teaches. The marital act has a two-fold purpose: 1)procreative and 2) unitive. If it were true that the marital act were reserved only for procreation, then it would thus follow that couples would only be intimate during fertile times – that is, not during pregnancy, only during those eight or so days a month that are fertile. That is not God’s plan.

 

[Ham1]

There are two reasons:

1. Contraception deliberately FRUSTRATES the natural process and physically or chemically changes the act against the original design of Nature. NFP, on the other hand, works within the original design of Nature (after all God designed these times of natural infertility). It doesn’t attempt to render infertile what God the Father originally designed as fertile.
2. The Holy Mother Church teaches us infallibly that contraception is intrinsically evil. That means that it can never be used no matter what the circumstances because the very act itself is gravely disordered. In order to disagree with this teaching, one would have to undermine completely the authority of the Church and the teachings of Christ Himself.

 

[Patrick]

Hi: I recently heard a good analogy for the difference between using NFP and contraception in terms of living God’s will. I heard it on Catholic Answers Live (can’t remember who)!

When you planned your wedding. You sent invitations to a lot of people that you hoped and believe would come. You also probably sent some to people who would probably not come - like the 90 year old aunt in the nursing home, or the uncle that lives in France etc. You invited them out of courtesy and you are open to them coming but you don’t think they will. However, you probably didn’t “uninvite” someone. You wouldn’t have sent out a card that said “please don’t come”. That would be rude.

A Catholic marriage must be open to the possibility of children. When we are actively looking to build our families, it’s like sending invitations to your wedding. You are open to children and expect they will come. When you use NFP, you are still sending out the invitation but you don’t really expect an answer. You’re sending out invitations and are open to the guest coming but don’t expect it. But contraception is like uninviting someone. It’s like saying we’re having party and you’re not invited - we’re having sex and it’s not about having children. Therein lies the difference between family planning using NFP and Contraception.

 

[mikworld]

NFP promotes abstinence during certain times of the month. The marital act can transform from an act of love to an act of lust over the course of a marriage. NFP promotes a balance so people will learn what it is to abstain from a good thing. We do the same during lent, and at other times of the year. NFP is a healthy, holy way to plan for children and promote the sanctity of sexual relations.
God Bless,

Justin

 

[johnnyjoe]

Oh Mysterious One,

NFP couples who seek to postpone a pregnancy ABSTAIN from sex. That is a NON-ACT. Or rather, it is a mortification of the flesh for a higher good that the couple has decided upon at that time.

You could argue whether they have a “serious reason” to postpone, but that is a different discussion. The very definition contraception is to be AGAINST conception. A couple who waits to have sex, a NON-ACT, is not contracepting, they are only waiting. Contraception is the deliberate ACT of taking a pill, using a barrier, or having a surgery that frustrates the design of God’s fertility system.