Need help talking with abortionist

[CatholicCorno]

One of my high school classmates became an OBGYN, and I later found out she was a proud abortion provider.

Recently, she seems to have made some inquiries into her faith (raised Catholic). I don’t know if she still does abortions. Something tells me no, but I don’t know for sure.

We have started communicating again after several years. She has asked me some very direct questions about the Church. I have answered her as accurately and charitably as I can. She is perplexed with the Magisterial teaching on birth control. Since I too was troubled with this for years, I shared some of our marital history, including our conversion to NFP.

Anyway, she wrote back, still defiant. This was fine, I expected it. But at the end of the email I was told that “obviously you are psycotic about sex.” I emailed back asking for clarification on this.

My question: how do I handle this? Is it time to walk away? Do I continue to be a gentle nag? Do I push hard? I have no problem aggresively defending the Church, but I also know that one attracts more flies with honey than vinegar.

Any experiences or thoughts? Thanks!

 

[JimG]

Tell her that you aren’t psychotic about sex, but that you do accept the Church’s teaching on contraception. You might start by asking her to just read “Humanae Vitae” for a start. It’s a very short encyclical. Then she might try reading “Why Humanae Vitae Was Right”, edited by Janet E. Smith.

In actuality, it is modern society, not the Church, which has become psychotic about sex. Forty to forty-five years ago, contraception was uncommon, even among non-Catholics, as was pre-marital sex, co-habitation, and divorce. Marriage was by and large a stable institution.

Since contraception came to be widely accepted, there have been enormous increase in pre-marital sex, teen sex, out of wedlock pregnancy, abortion, spousal abuse, and divorce, with a concomitant dis-integration of society and social institutions. . All the evils that the pope warned against in “Humanae Vitae” have come to pass.

This may not convince her. But ask her to at least read the material and give it some thought.

 

[AlanFromWichita]

I’ll take the challenge. Send me some of her email by PM if you wish and/or ask her if you may have permission to post some of it and I’ll take a shot at it.

Considering how hard I recently argued on the ABC=“not evil” side myself, I would like to see what arguments she is using, whether they are similar to mine, and whether they will lead down the same logical path. If not, I might be able to refute them. If so, I might help her come to grips with her own beliefs.

I don’t think it’s time to shut her off as long as she’s willing to communicate. This could be an opportunity of a lifetime to do something tangible for the pro-life cause, and I’m up for it. I believe that I am in a unique position to help connect with a person saying the things you said, since I know psychosis and I know what it’s like to argue with pro-lifers about birth control. When I get into a logical argument I’m usually in it for the long haul, until someone wins or comes to an impasse. I’d like to help you good people with this. There are several other posters in particular I can think of who could also lend very valuable assistance if you choose to make the details public.

Alan

 

[pennyh]

If she’s asking you, then she probably asking these questions of herself, unsure of what she believes. We all can justify anything we do in our own minds, and everyone at some point in their life, if not throughout is guilty of that. I do know that all christian, “non-Catholic” religions taught against contraception up until the sexual revolution and the teachings changed with the times, instead of remaining true, like our Mother Church. I will say many years ago I justified using contraception, and it was not until I fully understood things, and examined my faith that my mind changed. I also thought that I could be pro-life for myself and allow other to be pro-choice, but understand that if we don’t teach others, then how can they learn if not from friends they respect? I agree that NFP is the only way, and justifying contraception for finacial reasons is crazy as we all know someone from our parish with a dozen kids and every one of these family members always seem happy, well fed, clean, and sheltered. God does take care of them in so many ways. I’ve not seen a very large family yet with the problems “2 kid” families have. Good luck and I would not push too hard but be assured you should answer her questions, and back it up with scripture and examples.

 

[CatholicCorno]

Thanks, everyone, for your wonderful replies. I share your conclusions.

Since I tend to take these things too personally, I have decided to wait awhile and see if this person initiates further communication on the matter. Otherwise, I will simply continue to pray, and know that God has a plan for all of us.

 

[La_Chiara]

This woman doctor could very well not be open to the Church’s position on birth control and abortion. As someone who provided those services professionally, she may be very defensive and closed to the Church’s position because she would have to admit guilt at what she has done and decide not to provide those services any more. That might be something that is too difficult for her to do at this point in her career and spiritual life. So don’t feel bad if you sense that she gets defensive or angry and gets personal. Recognize that the Holy Spirit may need to work on her more before she is fully open (if ever) to the truth.

 

[1ke]

CatholicCorno:

One of my high school classmates became an OBGYN, and I later found out she was a proud abortion provider.

Recently, she seems to have made some inquiries into her faith (raised Catholic). I don’t know if she still does abortions. Something tells me no, but I don’t know for sure.

We have started communicating again after several years. She has asked me some very direct questions about the Church. I have answered her as accurately and charitably as I can. She is perplexed with the Magisterial teaching on birth control. Since I too was troubled with this for years, I shared some of our marital history, including our conversion to NFP.

Anyway, she wrote back, still defiant. This was fine, I expected it. But at the end of the email I was told that “obviously you are psycotic about sex.” I emailed back asking for clarification on this.

My question: how do I handle this? Is it time to walk away? Do I continue to be a gentle nag? Do I push hard? I have no problem aggresively defending the Church, but I also know that one attracts more flies with honey than vinegar.

Any experiences or thoughts? Thanks!

Please get some of the resources available at www.omsoul.com. Call them and discuss the situation and they will be able to recommend the best materials to get and share.