Need Help with Friend who Claims to be Catholic but Attends Protestant Church

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amaryllis3

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Hi! I’m sorry if I have posted this in the wrong category; this is my first time on a forum. I’m not quite sure how these work

For reference, I am 18 and my friend is 17. We’ve known each other for about 9 years.
She attends a Methodist Church every week with another friend, but says she’s still Catholic and believes what the Catholic Church teaches. I’ve invited her to come to my Church many times, but she has never agreed, often saying that her parents don’t want her there (her parents left the Church awhile ago) I’m not sure if I should just leave her or what the right approach is to talk to her. I’d appreciate any help! Thanks!
 
Sort of like saying “I’m a Democrat” and then voting Republican in every election. You are what you do.
 
She’s a minor, so don’t encourage her to go against her parents’ wishes. Let her know the offer stands when she reaches 18.
 
0331 said:
OP, please disregard this advice.

The history of the Church is full of people being Catholic and doing Catholic things, like going to Holy Mass and receiving the sacraments, against the wishes of parents and guardians.
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We should not be telling the OP to encourage her friend to go against her parents’ wishes. From the forum rules: “11. Do not offer or solicit medical, psychiatric, psychological, or legal advice. Do not give advice that is contrary to civil law. Do not give advice to a minor that opposes the instruction of a parent or legal guardian. All such discussions should be directed to the proper authorities: parents, guardians, therapists, parish priests, or primary care providers.”

The OP should not encourage her friend to go against what her parents say and we should not tell her otherwise. Let the friend come of age and see what decision she makes regarding her religious beliefs. If the OP extends an invitation after she is 18 and she agrees then that is fine. But not before.
 
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There have been several threads here in the past where a minor has wanted to convert or go to Mass when their parents have said no. The replies have always been to tell them to obey their parents as long as they are minors.

We cannot advise a minor to go against their parents’ wishes and we cannot encourage posters to tell minors to disobey their parents either.
 
0331 said:
That’s a history of bad advice, then.
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It is advice that has been dispensed by Priests on this forum, and is supported by the forum rules. It is not bad advice simply because you disagree with it.

To repeat, we cannot tell the OP to encourage her friend to disobey her parents.
 
We’re going to have to agree to disagree.
 
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Your friend is a minor. She must obey her parents.

Do not encourage her to disobey them.

When she is an adult she can decide where she wants to go.
 
0331 said:
We’re giving advice to a poster who wants to evangelize her friend. And the consensus so far is ‘Don’t invite your friend to Mass’?
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This is not correct. The answer is the one so many on here have already stated. We, on this forum, are not to give advice that a minor disregards her parent’s rules. The 18 year old may continue to invite her friend to Mass if that is her choice.

This isn’t a matter of the minor waiting a few months until her 18 birthday to choose what church she attends, it is a matter of respecting the parent’s right to make decisions for their minor children.
 
Right from the CAF rules:

Do not give advice to a minor that opposes the instruction of a parent or legal guardian.

Random strangers on the internet should not be advising a minor to defy his or her parents. When this person is of legal age, she can make her own decisions.
 
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DeniseNY said:
Random strangers on the internet should not be advising a minor to defy his or her parents. When this person is of legal age, she can make her own decisions.
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Actually, random strangers on the internet are advising a person who is not a minor to continue to ask her minor friend, who is Catholic, to go to Catholic mass.

No one is advising minors anything here. But people are advising the friend to not invite her Catholic friend to Catholic mass. And it seems a bit backward to me, on a Catholic forum, that we’d be so scrupulous about advising a friend to not invite her Catholic friend to Catholic mass.
 
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