Newbie on a road of discovery

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Wally189

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Hello world!

I’m a newbie to the church. Well, I say newbie I’ve attended mass on and off for years, sometimes even for the whole of Lent or Advent. However; I seem to have huge issues with commitment which leads to this post…help!

I believe in God absolutely and without question, albeit I have certainly been a doubting Thomas or a denying Peter in the past. As time has passed in my 38 years I’ve periodically had moments of religious enlightenment and then very “dry” periods of time. Still, my commitment to faith and belief is a struggle.

Part of the reasoning behind that commitment is because I have so many questions. Some of which I know cant be answered but those questions keep coming back to me over and again. Things like “the age of the earth” in a world where evolution and Darwin theory is popular. Then there are the scandals that have happened in the church in its 2000 odd year history, confusion around pre/post vatican 2 and so on. Maybe I’m putting too much pressure on myself but I read up on these subjects and others and I’m more confused than ever.

Sometimes I go to mass and feel great (I’m not confirmed so I cant take communion) but I question if I’m just there for the company or if I’m just jealous others get communion and I want to be “one if the gang”. That said I always feel good afterwards having spent time in Gods house. I love spending time saying the rosary but I wonder if its calm and repetition or if I’m actually getting something from prayer. That said there have been a minimum of two occasions in my life where miracles (to me) have happened which I dont think I could write off as coincidence .

At the moment I’ve been trying to do the Liturgy of the hours (using an app) but I feel I’m doing more reading than praying, I’m repeating myself and not showing God any honour as I have my phone on in front of me. I find some of the text heavy going, sometimes I struggle to comprehend the entire passage. It’s like I cant win!

All of that said, I find the bible captivating, especially the gospels.

Pray for me…and if you have any advice please do share!

Thanks!
 
Welcome, Wally. Some things are just a matter of faith. I can tell you if you make a habit of prayer for faith, it will come to you.
 
One does not need to believe in a young earth, as is postulated by guys like Kent Hovind. No one can call you a heretic when it comes to how old you think the earth is. It is possible that the six “days” mentioned in Genesis 1 are six long periods of time-- not six 24 hour periods. I pray that the Lord guides you. Amen.
 
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Wally189 said:
Pray for me…and if you have any advice please do share!
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This I pray: May the Holy Spirit strengthen your faith, increase your love for God and neighbor, and assist and guide you on your faith journey.

Welcome to Catholic Answers Forums! Here’s my advice: There is a lot of truth here, but also a lot of junk. Do your best to sort out the wheat from the chaff, and I hope you don’t find it too confusing. There is a lot of love here, but also a lot of non-love. Don’t let the mean people get you down. Take a look around the categories, and feel free to ask questions and tell us what’s on your mind. God bless you!
 
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I think the thing that drives me nuts is that I’m absolutely captivated by the Bible, you know I love to read the scripture and imaging the stories. However; the pseudo scientist in me has a billion questions and then I end up rereading texts and trying to make them fit a theory. I absolutely cant believe a bug bang happened out of nothing to create something - that defies all logic. I also think (and I may be wrong as I’m not actually a scientist) a lot of discoveries evidence God as creator…silly things like knowing days were shorter in the past and the atmosphere heavier which makes me mistrust dating techniques. Even considering Eve having spoken to a snake…could human language have evolved that much that there may have been a point where we could communicate with animals? I just wish I could make sense of it without sounding nuts or driving myself nuts! Faith is the way forward methinks…m
 
Hello,
On the issue of having “dry” spells in one’s faith this is very common. I have been a practicing Catholic my whole life and it has happened to me many times. It has also happened to a lot of Saints. Saint Mother Teresa suffered with it most of her life. Saint John of the Cross called it the dark night of the soul. Some saints wrote that the reason it happens is so you don’t get attached to the feeling it gives but put ones trust in God. I hope this helps, if you want you can DM me.
God Bless you!
 
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