NFP and Contraception in marriage

[sarahledford]

Hi!

A friend of mine is married and they are both catholic. The husband decided after some time that he wasn’t ok with not using contraception anymore, would it be a sin for that wife to comply with the use of contraception for the sake of the marriage? how far would she have tio go in her beliefs before she could bend for the sake iof the marriage??

Thanks!

Sarah

 

[pensmama87]

She cannot participate in obtaining or using contraception, but she is not morally culpable if her husband chooses to do so himself.

I would encourage her to discuss this matter with her priest, and possibly take the issue to a competent marriage counselor (preferably referred by her priest) to figure out what’s going on with him.

 

[PaulGH]

Hi!

A friend of mine is married and they are both catholic. The husband decided after some time that he wasn’t ok with not using contraception anymore, would it be a sin for that wife to comply with the use of contraception for the sake of the marriage? how far would she have tio go in her beliefs before she could bend for the sake iof the marriage??

Thanks!

Sarah

Here is my understanding: If the husband insists on using contraception, the wife is not sinning as long as both of the following conditions are met:

(1) The wife does not participate in the act of using or obtaining the contraception (i.e., assuming it is a condom, she does not apply it, nor purchase it at the store)

(2) The wife makes it clearly known to her husband that she does not approve of the use of contraception (though she does not have to say this every time they are intimate)

That is my own interpretation and explanation, but here is a more official explanation, from the Vatican web site:

vatican.va/roman_curia/pontifical_councils/family/documents/rc_pc_family_doc_12021997_vademecum_en.html

In particular, look at points 13 and 14 under “3. Pastoral Guidelines for Confessors.”

 

[SusanneT]

Here is my understanding: If the husband insists on using contraception, the wife is not sinning as long as both of the following conditions are met:

(1) The wife does not participate in the act of using or obtaining the contraception (i.e., assuming it is a condom, she does not apply it, nor purchase it at the store)

(2) The wife makes it clearly known to her husband that she does not approve of the use of contraception (though she does not have to say this every time they are intimate)

That is my own interpretation and explanation, but here is a more official explanation, from the Vatican web site:

vatican.va/roman_curia/pontifical_councils/family/documents/rc_pc_family_doc_12021997_vademecum_en.html

In particular, look at points 13 and 14 under “3. Pastoral Guidelines for Confessors.”

And I would add that she doesn’t initiate intimacy when she knows her husband intends to sin.

 

[PaulGH]

And I would add that she doesn’t initiate intimacy when she knows her husband intends to sin.

I am not sure if that is a requirement, though I can understand how she would not want to lead him into further sin.

The best thing may be for her to print the document that I linked, and then to discuss the relevant parts of that document (and how it applies to her marriage) with a priest, possibly even within the sacrament of Penance.

 

[FrenzyJen]

I understand that a spouse is allowed to have sex as long as they are not condoning it, but it would be such a huge turn-off to me. Thanks for the gift of…part of yourself, I guess?? No thanks. We can make love again when you’re willing to actually make love.

 

[SusanneT]

I understand that a spouse is allowed to have sex as long as they are not condoning it, but it would be such a huge turn-off to me. Thanks for the gift of…part of yourself, I guess?? No thanks. We can make love again when you’re willing to actually make love.

I completely agree !