NFP classes as part of marriage preparation?

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The_Rigbys

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Some dioceses don’t require engaged couples to take any instruction in NFP.
Some require them to attend an introductory talk.
Some require them to take a full series of classes.

Which approach do you prefer?
 
I would prefer that couples wishing to be married in the Church take a whole course of NFP, however, living in this world, I would probably be happy if our parish said anything about the subject at all to prospective couples. :rolleyes:
 
Hmm, I just realized that my own preference doesn’t really fit into any of the categories…but I forgot to include an “Other” option. :o Here it is:
  1. All the couples are given an introductory talk on NFP, given in the context of the Church’s teachings on marital chastity and openness to life.
  2. Later, when the couple meets with their priest to go over the FOCCUS or PREPARE test, he talks with them to find out whether they’re planning to limit their family size. If so, they’re required to take a full NFP course. If not, they’re given the option of taking a different course that’s more likely to be helpful to their circumstances. This could be a directed retreat, or a study series about “Familiaris Consortio” and other papal encyclicals. (Or, on a more prosaic level, “Cooking for a Crowd, with Mary Ann Kuharski,” or “Dr. Ray’s Guide to 14-Passenger Vans” 😛 )
Okay, it’s a bit complicated…but I think it gets the job done. 🙂
 
The Rigbys:
  1. All the couples are given an introductory talk on NFP, given in the context of the Church’s teachings on marital chastity and openness to life.
This is pretty much how it is done in our Archdiocese (Detroit). Couples aren’t required to take a full course, but all are required to attend an informational session/talk where they learn about the different NFP methods, what the Church teaches and why, and the benefits of NFP.

I can’t honestly say that my husband and I were immediately convinced. I had been on the Pill for medical reasons and we saw no reason to stop that. But the talk did put a little niggling idea in my head. When we decided recently to start trying for a child, we decided to go the Sympto-Thermal route. We’re pretty pleased with it and I have no plans to go back on the Pill.
 
My wife and I were married in the Archdiocese of New York, and we were required to take a full NFP course. I was living in Texas at the time, and had to travel up for the classes.

It was wonderful, and really brought us closer together. I highly recommend it for all married couples. If it wasn’t required, I don’t know if we would have even known it existed!!

Philip
 
In our diocese, mention of NFP comes in marraige prep. It comes up in the session on ‘communication and decision making’. The diocese does not require the full course. I do know of one parish, however, where the pastor requires the full course. Couples usually complain, but then come back and thank the pastor later!! —KCT
 
The only thing i could do is vote “I don’t know”, i have never taken a class or had a brief overview…

I married a Southern Baptist 26 years ago thinking I was safe and we had twin daughters 13 months later…

then 30 months later had another daughter…

then 36 months later had a son…

Little did i know, she was catholic from the waist down… 😛

Seriously, I agree… during the 6 month of Pre-Cana it wouldn’t hurt at all to include some form of NFP. Now, who’s to decide weather it should be required or optional? Not me!.. :cool:
 
Currently our Diocese requires a witness talk for NFP at the Marriage Preparation Classes. There are 4 methods that are taught in our Diocese, so even an intro class would be difficult.

I voted for a full series of classes. Ideally, I think it would be great! Unfortunately, we don’t have enough NFP teachers to cover all of the programs in the diocese. At one point, we were working on a first class that would incorporate all 4 methods. But, I haven’t heard much on that lately.

The other diocese’s ( is this correct?) that do require an intro class or a series probably only offer one method of NFP. Does anybody know about this?

I also know of individual priests who require a series of classes for couples. I wish it were across the board though. . .
 
My wife and I coordinate the pre-Cana marriage preparation course in our parish (Diocese of Atlanta). NFP is discussed in one of the sessions entitled “Life, Love and Sexuality”.
The presenters are an NFP couple and underscore that this is just an introduction to NFP and that, if the couples are interested, they can provide further information on upcoming courses.
 
If contraception is not an option for Catholics, then the information given them should be beyond introductory. Classes should be required as a part of marriage preparation. Classes should also be easily accessible for those already married wishing to learn about NFP.
 
Seeking Wisdom:
If contraception is not an option for Catholics, then the information given them should be beyond introductory. Classes should be required as a part of marriage preparation. Classes should also be easily accessible for those already married wishing to learn about NFP.
Yes, I agree exactly. You can’t start a faithful Catholic marriage without the means. I’ve been excited that my Archdiocese in Denver requires a complete course in NFP. It’s only been 3 or 4 years, and I’ve seen a dramatic change in the number of educated couples. It’s also what brought my wife and I to teach NFP.

The difficulty is convincing priests to enforce the requirements. This has been the toughest challenge. But, as more couples practice it and are more vocal, it will change. Of course, newer priests help…
 
Hi, all.

NFP classes should be optional in the pre-marriage preparation. Not all people who marry are in the fertile age or may have known fertility problems.

If I were required to take a full series of such classes I’m afraid I would “sleep” through them :sleep: (I’m a 41 year old lady and have fertility problems).

However it should be highly recommended for younger couples, but not mandatory.
 
My husband and I attended an Engaged Encounter retreat a few years ago as part of the Seattle Archdiocese marriage preparation course. We were extremely disappointed by the experience. We were especially disheartened by the lack of information given to couples regarding NFP. Although they handed out literature on NFP, it was hardly mentioned. Following the retreat I emailed the coordinating couple to express my concern that such a beautiful Church teaching was basically ignored. I received this response in return:

“Natural Family Planning is specifically included in every weekend, albeit to a limited degree. There is a lot to cover during the weekend. In addition, this particular topic is one where it is very easy to alienate couples who have already formed such strong opinions on the subject that they are unlikely to listen. In addition this alienation may lead them to reject other content of the weekend that could have set them on a road to a more successful marriage and a growing relationship with God.”

My husband and I have only found that the use of NFP has brought us closer to God. It is sad that the Seattle Archdiocese doesn’t think it is important enough to include an in depth presentation of NFP to Engaged Encounter couples.
 
We had to go to an introductory talk as part of our marriage prep, then at engaged encounter there was a “witness” talk by a couple. It was good info but I think it would have been better for my husband to go through an entire class series on it to help him better understand…he’s not Catholic. I also think couples would take it more seriously if they had more explaination about it.
 
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Philip:
My wife and I were married in the Archdiocese of New York, and we were required to take a full NFP course. I was living in Texas at the time, and had to travel up for the classes.

It was wonderful, and really brought us closer together. I highly recommend it for all married couples. If it wasn’t required, I don’t know if we would have even known it existed!!

Philip
Glad to hear it. I was married in the Archdiocese of NY 12 years ago and not only was nothing required, it wasn’t even mentioned. We did most of our pre-caana sessions in Michigan where we were living at the time and nothing mentioned there either. Nothing about NFP, that is. The priest (in Michigan) did say that we needed a good reason to use the Pill. 😦
 
I am torn, a year ago my answer would’ve been that NFP should be mentioned within the context of discussion of “marital chastity and openness to life”, the couples should be encouraged to take a full course if they feel they will need it. I felt that couples should not be forced to learn NFP. If dh and I had known how to use NFP we likely would not have my first son, I was using the “calendar method” to avoid as I had just miscarried. I also never wanted to learn as I was afraid that with all of my human-ness I would have used it selfishly.

So- we never learned NFP and all was great until my last birth, at which point my uterus ruptured and I have been told that it is not safe for me to carry any more children, now I am stuck learning NFP with my health/life/life of my child on the line, and I wish I had learned it before.

Certainly, couples should be taught the evils of Artificial BC, but, I am afraid that forcing learning NFP presumes that the couple will need it, and I don’t think it should be used in a contraceptive way.
 
I voted for “optional.” I believe that marriage prep should include discussion on the Church’s teaching on being open to life. If a lecture or talk is necessary, that would be great. I think courses for NFP should be easily available and highly promoted. I believe the priest ought to believe that the engaged couple will not be lying when they promise to be open to life at their wedding, for him to be willing to marry them. But this talk should not include the details of how to practice NFP. After all, we are not required to use NFP, in fact for some people it would be a sin. Not every couple has the “grave reason” necessary to need NFP.

As a user and proponent of NFP, there are times when I wish I just didn’t know the signs of my fertility. When I am not actively trying to achieve or avoid pregnancy, every marital act is still performed with the knowlege that one or the other of those possibilities is likely. Not a lot of room for surprises. 🙂 Now, because I have felt the need to postpone pregnancy, and because I wanted extra knowledge in how to get pregnant in the past, I use NFP, and live with the “burden” of always knowing my signs. But some couples do not feel the need to postpone pregnancy and therefore don’t need to know NFP right away. They should not be forced to learn it, when they are following the Church’s teachings just fine. I know several couples who didn’t know NFP when they got married, accepted children when they came, and learned NFP later when they needed to know it (and some never did).
 
I’m recently married, and I’m very glad that my husband and I took the full classes during our engagement. It made it easier to be open with each other and encouraged us to talk about things that are sometimes hard to talk about. Our instructors had me begin my charting a few months before our wedding, so by the time we got married, I felt pretty comfortable with the system. It will be useful not only in spacing but also in trying to get pregnant.
 
At our parish we do about a half hour overview of NFP as part of our Marriage Prep program.
 
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