Non-practicing Catholic book references, please

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YinYangMom

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Ok, here’s the thing…I’m getting agitated about my brothers and sister no longer practicing the faith.

Two have embraced being baptist, one to the extent of home-schooling them and censoring all media (name removed by moderator)ut into the home (the kids are 15 and 17 and they are wonderful kids!) The other just to the point of being active in the local church activities/community and keeping Mom and me from influencing their kids with Catholic teachings.

The third believes he’s still a faithful catholic because he refrains from receiving communion when he goes to mass, but he doesn’t go regularly and he doesn’t even claim a local parish with which to get involved. He is in denial about a drinking problem but he loves Catholicism, believes in Jesus, but considers himself unworthy because of his previous marriage and subsequent remarriage. He certainly has grounds for an annulment but isn’t moved to go down that path but I believe through good reading/audio listening he may begin to consider it.

They live on the west coast, I do not. I email with my sister, sometimes with the third, other times with the wife of the first. Faith comes up but always in a ‘we respect your ways, I expect you to respect ours’ kind of way.

My mother has asked/instructed me not to make waves with my siblings about their Catholicism. I got upset when the two baptists bashed Mary to my mother, whom they know reveres Her and always has. My mother held her own in the debate but finally opted to get out of my brother’s house and not return. My father, not saying anything, pretty much took the same position. He won’t return to that house because it was the ultimate insult to our mom. We’ve had several family gatherings since then at our parents’ home and on the surface we look like we’re a loving, agreeable family, but honestly, spiritually - theres a huge wall I’m getting tired talking over.

So here’s what I want to do…or at least I’m feeling moved to go in this direction…For Christmas presents this year I want to send my siblings books/audio/dvds which would subtly call them back home. It would have to be the kind of thing that appears Christian, broadly based rather than obviously Catholic. I’d also plan to sew inside bible covers green scapulars…

You guys are so good about knowing which authors are good for which type of believer…I’m asking for gift idea suggestions.

Also, I’m asking for your comments with regard to my plan, intentions…maybe this will rock the boat…maybe I should just continue to pray for them and leaving things be…???
 
I wonder if Scott Hahn has any subtle works for Protestant Bible-thumpers?
 
My advice is to thread carefully because you may be on thin ice, espcially with the ones who actively participate in other Christian denominations and who are raising “wonderful” kids.

If you are going to sew in scapulars to the Bible covers of your Baptist relatives, I suggest using one that has only a simple cross rather than a picture of Mary. (Leaflet Missal offers a small brown scapular that might be minimally offensive; it still has medals on it that might offend. I don’t know if anything similar is available in green scapulars) Also, you may want to think about not having it blessed, as it might be handled sacriligiously if they discovered it.

For the homeschoolers, you might consider a gift of the book The Harp and Laurel Wreath by Laura Berquist. (She’s a Catholic homeschooler who runs Mother of Diving Grace). The book contains poetry and dictation for the classical teaching method, and it selects writings from both Catholic and other authors (some that isn’t religious at all.) It may be a gift that they would not only read, but share with their children as it’s a great homeschooling reference book. At a minimum, it probably wouldn’t offend them. It certainly isn’t what one would think of as a tool of evangelism as there are very few things in it, I’d considered exclusively Catholic. (But it does have things such as the Anima Christi in it.)

Whatever you decide to do, pray heavily before you proceed.
 
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gardenswithkids:
My advice is to thread carefully because you may be on thin ice, espcially with the ones who actively participate in other Christian denominations and who are raising “wonderful” kids.

If you are going to sew in scapulars to the Bible covers of your Baptist relatives, I suggest using one that has only a simple cross rather than a picture of Mary. (Leaflet Missal offers a small brown scapular that might be minimally offensive; it still has medals on it that might offend. I don’t know if anything similar is available in green scapulars) Also, you may want to think about not having it blessed, as it might be handled sacriligiously if they discovered it.

For the homeschoolers, you might consider a gift of the book The Harp and Laurel Wreath by Laura Berquist. (She’s a Catholic homeschooler who runs Mother of Diving Grace). The book contains poetry and dictation for the classical teaching method, and it selects writings from both Catholic and other authors (some that isn’t religious at all.) It may be a gift that they would not only read, but share with their children as it’s a great homeschooling reference book. At a minimum, it probably wouldn’t offend them. It certainly isn’t what one would think of as a tool of evangelism as there are very few things in it, I’d considered exclusively Catholic. (But it does have things such as the Anima Christi in it.)

Whatever you decide to do, pray heavily before you proceed.
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Yes, that’s why I’m seeking advice here first. I do want to proceed cautiously and carefully. I feel I will have one opportunity to plant the seed so I don’t want to jeopardize that. If I know the scapular is there while I’m praying, then when we next get together, I would be stronger in my personal interactions with them. If nothing else, I would hope they would not be so abrasive about the faith in my presence as they would have otherwise.

This book you recommend…what age group would it cover? My niece and nephew are 15 and 17. And remember, I don’t want to convert my sister-in-law or her children as much as I want my brother to feel a pull to return home, for himself.

I want him to remember his roots, his teachings, so that when his wife and other church members speak untruths about catholicism he will be strong enough to respond with the truth. Apparently he not only did not defend the Truth, he was swayed to the other side and that is what hurts me the most. He knows full well we do not worship Mary, and yet, he chimed in with the others against my mother in that debate. I would like the Spirit to keep him from speaking against the church, and if possible to start speaking up for Her. I have found myself saying things in defense of the church I didn’t even know I believed, and keeping quiet when I wanted to say something but couldn’t because the timing didn’t ‘feel’ right.

This is what I want for my brother and sister: If they can’t come home, then at least protect them from speaking lies and not defending the truth. Is the green scapular good for that?
 
YinYangMom-- What struck me about your thread was your siblings insulting both their own mother and Jesus’ mother in the same act. It seems that at least ONE of your mother’s children (you) should honor her. As she’s specifically asked/ instructed you not to make waves, you should be careful not to make waves.

Many people leave the Catholic Church, but the call to return home does happen, and rarely in ways that we could ever orchestrate. Several books I’ve read on apologetics suggest that family members may be the wrong ones to do obvious evangelism because of all the emotional history. Co-workers and friends may have better results, and I think they are often sent by God in answer to family’s prayer.

Pray that God puts good, solid Catholics in their lives. Maybe pray for the conversion of a Protestant friend or preacher of theirs that might spur on their return home. Have Masses said for them. I also like to send donations to cloistered nuns requesting their prayers for serious matter when I’m really concerned about something. And offer up the sufferings they cause you for their sake. (I think it was ultimately my mom offering her suffering that brought me back to the Church.)

Back to books. The Harp and Laurel Wreath which I recommended previously is for homeschoolers of all ages, including teens. It breaks down reading selections and questions for the reading into various stages of development, but it has a couple hundred pages devoted to older students. I don’t know your sister in law’s homeschooling style, but I think most homeschoolers would at least appreciate the thought behind such a gift.

I agree that Born Fundamentalist, Born Again Catholic is a great book. I personally plan to give it to an in-law the next time she gives me anti-Catholic material. It’s worded very carefully to explain Catholicism to non-Catholics, but it certainly is not subtle.

As far as the Catholic brother, if your mom doesn’t mind you evangelizing him, Fr. Corapi has some fabulous c.d.'s and tapes that might help him. He’s certainly not subtle either.

I’m sorry that your siblings have caused such pain for your mother and you.
 
Just chiming in that I love what I’ve read of Born Fundamentalist, Born Again Catholic so far (I just got it today because it came in through InterLibrary Loan, yippee!) Now I’m off to bed to read some in it before I go to sleep… hopefully Rome Sweet Rome will come via ILL next week (I put in a bunch of ILL requests for some good looking Catholic books - here’s hoping the other three don’t come in on the same week! lol)

I didn’t grow up in a Fundamentalist church like he did, but we definately were somewhere in the middle between that and mainline protestantism, so theres a lot that really hits home for me (though only a few “new” thoughts so far as I learned a lot from reading and listening to Scott Hahns conversion story online)
 
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gardenswithkids:
YinYangMom-- What struck me about your thread was your siblings insulting both their own mother and Jesus’ mother in the same act. It seems that at least ONE of your mother’s children (you) should honor her. As she’s specifically asked/ instructed you not to make waves, you should be careful not to make waves.
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Which is why the green scapular appeals to me, and why I’m testing the waters about books/tapes with the good members here. I’m not sure about that approach. I’ve never even let on to my brother and sister that our parents even told me about the incident. I certainly plan to honor her wish, but at the same time, I’m feeling a pull inside to do ‘something’. Perhaps the Lord is telling me they’re ready for some Good News and so my one opportunity is near. That’s certainly how it feels…
Many people leave the Catholic Church, but the call to return home does happen, and rarely in ways that we could ever orchestrate. Several books I’ve read on apologetics suggest that family members may be the wrong ones to do obvious evangelism because of all the emotional history. Co-workers and friends may have better results, and I think they are often sent by God in answer to family’s prayer.

Pray that God puts good, solid Catholics in their lives. Maybe pray for the conversion of a Protestant friend or preacher of theirs that might spur on their return home. Have Masses said for them. I also like to send donations to cloistered nuns requesting their prayers for serious matter when I’m really concerned about something. And offer up the sufferings they cause you for their sake. (I think it was ultimately my mom offering her suffering that brought me back to the Church.)
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The baptist siblings have insulated themselves physically and geographically with baptist people - in work, home, church. Visits from my parents and myself are truly a ‘token’ thing - brief and superficial. And yet, when they come to visit my parents they are very open and generous. The tension is much lighter for some reason, but those visits are once every two years or so.

Interestingly enough, and part of me is suspicious about it, but my baptist brother’s wife has made two significant overtures toward my parents recently - one was actively participating in the planning of their 50th wedding anniversary and the other was organizing a family reunion two years later. Both events were on mom’s home turf and that’s what made the overtures remarkable. Up until then that woman refused to come down to spend any time on mom’s turf and she kept my brother from accepting invitations too. So maybe this turnaround is also an indication to me that an opening is being made available to reach my brother???
Back to books. The Harp and Laurel Wreath which I recommended previously is for homeschoolers of all ages, including teens. It breaks down reading selections and questions for the reading into various stages of development, but it has a couple hundred pages devoted to older students. I don’t know your sister in law’s homeschooling style, but I think most homeschoolers would at least appreciate the thought behind such a gift.

I agree that Born Fundamentalist, Born Again Catholic is a great book. I personally plan to give it to an in-law the next time she gives me anti-Catholic material. It’s worded very carefully to explain Catholicism to non-Catholics, but it certainly is not subtle.
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Well the good news is I have some time to check out those books before Christmas. I look forward to it.
As far as the Catholic brother, if your mom doesn’t mind you evangelizing him, Fr. Corapi has some fabulous c.d.'s and tapes that might help him. He’s certainly not subtle either.
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I was listening to Corapi’s talk on hell this morning when it became clear he should be the messenger for my brother. I am going to save up my money to buy Fr.'s series. If anyone can reach my brother, he can. It’s just the style my brother needs and would appreciate.
I’m sorry that your siblings have caused such pain for your mother and you.
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Yeah, me too. But pain is relative and because of our faith, we don’t focus on it much…we focus instead on praying for their re-version. I know my mom is praying the rosary daily for them, as am I. It’ll happen. I can feel it. I’m just trying to discern if I’m supposed to take another step beyond the prayers or not.
 
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