Not sure if I should post here

[BrandonR]

Hi, I have a reconciliation question (yes I know there have been lots of them)
I consider myself a devout Catholic with a lot of struggles, and now I’m struggling with confession. I know that it is very important and I go quite often. Maybe even too often… During my last confession the priest told me that going to confession more than once a month gets to be too much, because we become too scrupulous and we tend to think more of the sins than the mercy of Christ. However, It seems that almost every sin I commit is mortal. I feel my conscience is pretty well developed so I essentially know when I am sinning everytime, for example if I dishonor my parents somehow, I know that is wrong, and according to my understanding, this would be a mortal sin… Are mortal sins more common than most people seem to think?

Thank you

 

[AnneElliot]

It depends.

A good book you might like (and perhaps recommend to the priest who told you going to Confession more than once a month is too much) is Frequent Confession by Fr. Benedict Baur
amazon.com/Frequent-Confession-Place-Spiritual-Life/dp/1889334162/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1281575745&sr=8-1

Confession is not so much about sins, as it is about the mercy and forgiveness of God. Going to Confession, even frequently is a good thing. When we avail ourselves of the Sacrament of Confession we ask God to pour His graces (and His Precious Blood) out upon us.

 

[Chiltepin]

However, It seems that almost every sin I commit is mortal. I feel my conscience is pretty well developed so I essentially know when I am sinning everytime, for example if I dishonor my parents somehow, I know that is wrong, and according to my understanding, this would be a mortal sin… Are mortal sins more common than most people seem to think?

Thank you

I think that mortal sins are more common that people who confess never to rarely think and mortal sins are possibly less common than people who confess often/borderline scrupulously think.

I think you have a well developed conscience by reading your post! Maybe you should look into the three conditions neccessary for a mortal sin. You are correct in saying that because you know it is a sin while doing it, it may be mortal… but the gravity is also important.

When I was younger I used to think that any violation of a commandment was a mortal sin and even the tiniest lie was mortal because no one forced you and you know it is wrong. In my childhood understanding, mortal = commandment breaking, venial= being mean. Clearly that was not accounting for the three conditions of mortal sin. So, what a person lied about, or what a person stole can matter. Gravity is hard to determine, but you may not be committing mortal sins in your disrespecting your parents situation (I have no idea as you did not expand on what you did, I am not a confessor, so please don’t expand )

I can identify with the falling into sin, knowing it is mortal and going to confession, only to be told you go too often. I was not told I was scrupulous, I think the problem is I was just bad, not working hard enough to keep the things from happening yet again and again.

 

[Edward_H]

Good questions and advice.

The single biggest help for me was being told about “connecting one confession to the next confession, via a well formed purpose of amendment” (which is pointed at your key source of separation from God, your main sin/weakness). Every night you do a quick exam, keeping an eye/check on your purpose of amendment; how you’re doing in that area.

This way confessions don’t just become disconnected…they connect day to day via the daily exam.

It simplifies things down to main things to focus on, rather than a long list of scrupulous “faults”.

So your priest may be on to something if your confessions jump around from fault to fault vs. focus ever more sharply on core faults.

It’s helped me a lot, fwiw.

 

[JimG]

Pay attention to your confessor. It’s quite possible that some of this sins you confess as mortal are not mortal, either because they are not sufficiently grave, or involve something less than full consent of the will or full knowledge.