One Woman's Choice

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The story doesn’t seem right somehow … not just in what it says but the way it says it.

It doesn’t stay congruent with itself. I’m not confident these are the sincere remarks of a “real” woman.

She swings clear from making cold-blooded statement to sentimental longings, and plays up the sentimental longings a little much to buy into the other statements. She handles it a bit too “artistically,” and if she were really a professional writer, is not convincing.

It’s possible she might be severely bipolar or something, but her writing is too clear. With that much clarity, the incongruence doesn’t make sense.

I dunno … I’m tempted to speculate this might be “one woman’s story” all right, but only in the sense that political fairy tales are stories. I suspect this might be a mediocre writer conjuring up the feelings if not the whole incident, trying to glom on to pro-choice politics for some publicity and/or to promote their cause. I’d expect no more from the Washington Pest.

Alan

P.S. when each of our six children were preborn, the doctor made us aware of the test, as required by law (hope I have the right test). He was Catholic. We asked, “is there anything we can do to help the baby if the test comes out bad?” He answered, “no.” Then we asked, “is there a risk, even if remote, the baby will be harmed by the test itself?” He said, “yes, there is a small chance.” We told him then there is no reason to give the test.

(After the first couple kids we started using abbreviated versions of the script 😉 )
 
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AlanFromWichita:
…, the doctor made us aware of the test, as required by law (hope I have the right test). … We asked, “is there anything we can do to help the baby if the test comes out bad?” He answered, “no.” Then we asked, “is there a risk, even if remote, the baby will be harmed by the test itself?” He said, “yes, there is a small chance.” We told him then there is no reason to give the test.
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Same here. I didn’t take it because I wasn’t going to risk it. Down syndrome or not- our baby would be born.
 
We don’t want a life like that for our child
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Hearing that always gets me… One must ponder how it’s better to have no life at all.
While I have no doubt there can be joys and victories in raising a mentally handicapped child, for me and for Mike, it’s a painful journey that we believe is better not taken.
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But I’m quite certain that I made the right choice for the **three ** of us.
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Suppose there’s something I’m to young to understand 😦
 
In my state, doctors have to offer the AFP test. This is just a simple test of the mothers blood to check for abnormalities with the fetus. The test is unreliable, many come back as false postive. (For example, I work with 7 women 4 of them had false positives with at least one pregnancy.) Further testing such as an amnio proves the AFP right or wrong.

When I was 16 weeks pregnant, I was faced with the decision to have the AFP done. I asked my Doc what he thought and he said that he had to offer it for malpractice reasons, but that he didn’t recommend it because of the high number of false positives. He stated that it was merely an odds test, not a diagnostic one.

I didn’t have the AFP done. Will I for any future pregnancies. NO! My dh and I discussed it and we came to the conclusion that even if the tests proved we would have a child with a disability, we would accept he/she as a beautiful gift from God.

The article angered me. It angered me because noone can predict what will happen in life. One can have a child born normal. The child may end up in an accident and become disabled. I have an aunt who is mostly bedridden(walks with a walker) and is blind. She was born normal but was hit by a car when she was 5 years old. Did my grandmother want her dead because she was now disabled. Of course not!! My grandmother only loved her more and has taken care of her for the past 65 years. (My grandmother is 91!) My aunt is a true living saint and has been a blessing to my family.

People with disabilities are blessings and can bring people closer to God. It’s sad to see that we live in a selfish society that thinks otherwise.
 
Oh, I’d like to mention also that our Catholic doctor, after the first time we decided (and at the time we were unmarried and I was a much bigger clueless jerk than now so there was that additional uncertainty factor) to forego getting the test, the doctor smiled and said, “I’m happy you have made that decision. It is my job to present you with the option.”

Wow. Now that I think about it, that’s a perfect way for the world to build temptation into otherwise honorable people – have their trusted professional healers sell it to them.

It’s making me think that temptation could be a more effective path to sending large numbers of people to hell than outright oppression. If the state simply mandated the test must be done, the person would then be spared having sinned by getting the test done. Strangely, this “freedom of choice” implementation – ostensibly to honor various value systems – actually places people systematically in a near occasion of sin. No, the world isn’t forcing us to, but it tempts us to, thereby doing its evil deeds and holding itself blameless: “hey, you had a choice and you made your decision.”

Alan
 
I refused the test because 1. the absurd statistics on false positives, and 2, I refuse to line the pockets of a company who makes a test that ultimately leads to more abortions. Period.
 
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leaner:
I refused the test because 1. the absurd statistics on false positives, and 2, I refuse to line the pockets of a company who makes a test that ultimately leads to more abortions. Period.
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That’s a good summary. Covers the essentials but succinct (a standard I often fail to meet 😛 ).

I think the only defense is for us to continue to keep our eyes open. It is good (though I suppose it should be expected) that there are so many people here who understand that – the reason I find it worth comment at all is I find so many people in the world (including Catholics) who simply cannot think clearly no these types of issues, obviously victims of how society has trained their tendencies implanted by original sin.

Alan
 
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rhtaylor:
Read One Woman’s Choice After a Prenatal Test Shows Down Syndrome, A Wrenching Decision
As my mother wrote when she sent me this link “there are no words.”

R. Taylor
www.MaryMeetsDolly.com
A Catholic’s Guide to Genetics, Genetic Engineering and Biotechnology
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Here is another thread started regarding Prenatal Testing…

**The Abortion Debate No One Wants To Have

**Prenatal testing is making your right to abort a disabled child more like “your duty” to abort a disabled child.
washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/10/17/AR2005101701311.html?sub=AR

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?p=1045240#post1045240
illinoisleader.com/discu…40&TopicID=5081
 
A child is a child. When I was pregnant I opted not to know results of these tests. Any bad result would not change my decision on having my child!!! Lucky for me I was blessed with a beautiful healthy baby. Those tests aren’t always accurate either. you can get a false positive. I think they should be illegal.
 
What selfish decision. She made the right choice for the three of them? Yeah right. She made the right choice for her and her boyfriend because they didn’t want to raise this handicapped baby. Because why? Because they’re too old? Please…if the baby wasn’t disabled then she would be fine with her age. :rolleyes: It’s not like she couldn’t get help. I really don’t see the right choice as ever being killing an innocent child because he’s not the perfect baby his parents want him to be. The least she could have done was consider adoption. And no, I don’t think she has a right to grieve, especially if she doesn’t regret her decision! People that lose their children to sickness, accidents - they have a right to grieve. When the loss of your child is on your own hands…you don’t. Call me harsh but that’s what I think. 😦
 
I had an AFP with both children. My first, my daughter was a negative result. The second, my son was a positive result with a high risk of Down’s Syndrome. There was no question in my mind or my husband’s what we would do. We would take the gift God gave us. My doctor suggested a high resolution sonogram. The images were of a perfect baby boy. At birth, we had a beautiful baby boy that is now 5 years old.
If I had it do over, I would have refused the AFP. The week from the time we got the results, to the time we had the sonogram was the worst for us. Filled with tears, tension but finally came acceptance that this gift from God, was that, a gift from God.
 
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Celia:
What selfish decision.
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It certainly is, but we like to flower it up with nice verbage and try to blame others to try to make us think it is “what must be done.”

I still the article is made-up, and this is not really the honest reflections of a real woman. :hmmm:

Is it possible anyone really is that mixed up? :confused:

This is a “certified” psychotic asking this question! 😃

Alan
 
I would say she has the right to grieve. However, I would question the sincerity of this “grieving” if it doesn’t include repentance. She would have grieved in any event for the imaginary healthy child she would not have, but that is all she’s doing. She isn’t grieving for the real, imperfect child she killed, since she still feels she “made the right decision”.
I wonder, though, how many women would have made a different decision if society did not generally approve of abortion. It seems like a lot of people’s moral reasoning goes like this “it’s legal, so it must be ok”, “people expect me to”, or even “it’s considered the responsible thing to do in my situation”.
 
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BlindSheep:
I would say she has the right to grieve. However, I would question the sincerity of this “grieving” if it doesn’t include repentance. She would have grieved in any event for the imaginary healthy child she would not have, but that is all she’s doing. She isn’t grieving for the real, imperfect child she killed, since she still feels she “made the right decision”.
I wonder, though, how many women would have made a different decision if society did not generally approve of abortion. It seems like a lot of people’s moral reasoning goes like this “it’s legal, so it must be ok”, “people expect me to”, or even “it’s considered the responsible thing to do in my situation”.
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These are all great points! Your last quote which I bolded is worthy of specific comment, I thought. To me, this is where the world really is. It assumes that “responsibility” is doing whatever one must to “carry on” with some abstract of a life plan despite “obstacles” such as an “unintended pregnancy.”

What is the point of having a plan, a pattern, and at least on the surface, a well-constructed story book life? We all go through the motions of looking good, and for what?

Alan
 
Too bad, would have been a great kid.

She seems to want to set her abortion above all the other’s as somehow “really okay”; as if she is somehow more enlightened than all the others that commit this act of murder. Well, I hope she feels better. I wish I could say the same for her son.
 
I have to agree with Alan about the story being made up… at least to some degree. I say this because it’s got too much condescending tonage to it like she made a good choice and it trying to convince others it’s “not that bad.” I mean, “the doctor was nice, he held my hand until the anesthesia took…” etc, etc, puke, etc. I can tell you that abortionists are cold… they don’t give a darn about the women… they are in there to spend the least amount of time… and conversationalists they ain’t!

I had a miscarriage at 14 weeks so I had to have a D&C. (don’t worry… the baby died very, very early on- there was no fetus and no fetal pole… we just didn’t catch the miscarriage until 14 weeks because my body didn’t abort) One doc told me “oh, the procedure is just like an abortion, it’s nothing to worry about.” Needless to say, I made sure she wasn’t the one doing the procedure.

anyway… if this story is true, it’s a sad attempt from the writer to try to justify her actions and it’ll take a Rachel’s Vineyard retreat to help her heal once reality hits her. I feel sorry for her and her child.

Oh… one other note… I think it’s sad when the couple decided to end the life of a beautiful child but yet want to wait on marriage. I see a problem here.
 
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tamccrackine:
Oh… one other note… I think it’s sad when the couple decided to end the life of a beautiful child but yet want to wait on marriage. I see a problem here.
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Yes, perhaps a bit of insight into the real motivation? :hmmm:

Alan
 
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Breton:
Too bad, would have been a great kid.

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Probably not with a mother like that. That, however, is not the point. Even rotten kids who grow up to be rotten people because of rotten parents are lovingly willed into being by God, who does not err. She’s too selfish to have a child. I’m sure she hasn’t had one before now because her career was soooooo important that it wouldn’t have been fair to the child. And she’s too selfish to consider adopting some poor soul who needs a mommy and daddy. I hope she does have a child and when she holds it in her arms the first time, she realizes what a horrible thing she did by aborting her other child and never stops weeping. If, of course, she does in fact exist.
 
Ok, maybe I missed something in the article, but where, exactly was the “wrenching decision”??? Seemed like there was no question about killing her child and all the emotion involved was spent on complaining about how “unfeeling” everyone was to her…except the nice doctor, that is! 😦
 
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