Outdoor Wedding - Why not?

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BradleyScott

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Hello, everyone! I’m a recent “Revert” back to the Church. I was wondering - why does the Church frown on outdoor weddings? Is there ever a circumstance in which an outdoor wedding is permissible? Is that a diocesan policy issue up to each bishop to permit or forbid? I personally feel getting married in an actual church is beautiful and of course more traditional, but have friends who are faithful Catholics, and would really love a nice outdoor wedding. I guess since it seems that since the Sacrament of Matrimony is conferred by each spouse upon the other, with free consent, intent of permanence, being open to life, and without any impediment such as blood relationship, with a priest present along with other Christian witnesses, simply out of doors, doesn’t seem that it would vitiate the effectiveness of a marriage. Even if one could say it’s great to be in the presence of Christ in the Eucharist, don’t we carry the Host out of the sanctuary to those who can’t make it to Church, or have priests say Mass in “outdoor chapels” at many parishes? What’s the “deal-breaker”?
 
I see your point, and it’s my understanding that a bishop could grant a dispensation to have a wedding outddors, if he wished. However, I think what the Church wants to emphasize to those in the midst of swooning for each other is that what they are undertaking is a sacrament and a promise made before God - and God’s house is the church.

Yes, Mass, baptisms, confession, etc. could be and sometimes are held outside. But I think there are already a lot of worldly distractions surrounding weddings, and I think the Church is trying to ground things a bit.

Gem
 
I guess what you are saying is that the canons which state the rules on where marriages can be celebrated are clear enough. But the logic and reasoning that goes into those rules is not obvious to most of us.

Something came up recently that made it clear to me that the Catholic Church takes a very different point of view of some of our rituals than does most of society. It concerned the burial of a relative in a non-Catholic branch of the family. When some controversy arose over the nature of the burial a fairly devote (non-Catholic) family member stated that the committal should be done as the deceased wished, not as the living family wished. Most of us would agree that the wishes of the deceased should be honored as closely as is reasonable. But as Catholics we believe that for some rituals, God’s rules are to be honored above those of of the parties involved, (both living and deceased in this case.)

My point is that many of our sacraments are associated with rituals that have roots/parallels in secular society. Sacraments are a kind of a sacred commissioning to use the gifts received via the sacrament for the benefits of all. We tend to think of the sacrament of matrimony as just the Christian version of secular marriage for the benefit of the couple. But it’s really much more. Matrimony is where a man and woman pledge to serve the Church through their union.

I think the reason the sacrament of Matrimony belongs in the parish church is because it’s not about what the couple gets. It’s about the couple proclaiming to the parish what they are going to do in service of the Church.

Remember also that there are no private weddings. By their very nature weddings are full parish events. An outdoor wedding is somewhat exclusionary.
 
SMHW said:
I guess what you are saying is that the canons which state the rules on where marriages can be celebrated are clear enough. But the logic and reasoning that goes into those rules is not obvious to most of us.

Something came up recently that made it clear to me that the Catholic Church takes a very different point of view of some of our rituals than does most of society. It concerned the burial of a relative in a non-Catholic branch of the family. When some controversy arose over the nature of the burial a fairly devote (non-Catholic) family member stated that the committal should be done as the deceased wished, not as the living family wished. Most of us would agree that the wishes of the deceased should be honored as closely as is reasonable. But as Catholics we believe that for some rituals, God’s rules are to be honored above those of of the parties involved, (both living and deceased in this case.)

My point is that many of our sacraments are associated with rituals that have roots/parallels in secular society. Sacraments are a kind of a sacred commissioning to use the gifts received via the sacrament for the benefits of all. We tend to think of the sacrament of matrimony as just the Christian version of secular marriage for the benefit of the couple. But it’s really much more. Matrimony is where a man and woman pledge to serve the Church through their union.

I think the reason the sacrament of Matrimony belongs in the parish church is because it’s not about what the couple gets. It’s about the couple proclaiming to the parish what they are going to do in service of the Church.

Remember also that there are no private weddings. By their very nature weddings are full parish events. An outdoor wedding is somewhat exclusionary.
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Agreed.

Furthermore, the bishops don’t want to participate in the further denigration of marriage. Marriage is a sacrament before God. These lavish, expensive parties that people throw to celebrate a meaningless step in their relationship (from cohabitation with no children to cohabitation with no children and a piece of paper) are ridiculous. Marriage is not. They want to make people understand that they are receiving a sacrament and not getting and opportunity to parade around narcissistically and tell everyone how happy they are.
 
Thanks, everyone. I actually simply wonder where these “canons” (“that the canons which state the rules on where marriages can be celebrated are clear enough”) are which discuss where marriages can be celebrated. I’m usually pretty satisfied by the Church’s pretty keen ability to explain its reasoning - I just had not yet seen the basis upon which the Church made any sort of “injunction” against outdoor weddings, much less the reasoning.

Does anyone know where the reference might be? I’m going to dig on the Vatican website in the meanwhile!

Again, thanks, and God bless you! These have been terrific and helpful insights! I might just add that I’m not sure I’m ready to dismiss the desire to have an outdoor wedding as symptomatic of narcissism or seeking ridiculous excesses or self-exaltation. I’ve seen a number of very simple, but beautiful outdoor ceremonies which were pure expressions of the bride and bridegroom’s love for one another under majestic oak trees created by our loving Father.
 
Found something! Wow, the internet sure is handy!

Can. 1118 §1. A marriage between Catholics or between a Catholic party and a non-Catholic baptized party is to be celebrated in a parish church. It can be celebrated in another church or oratory with the permission of the local ordinary or pastor.

**§2. The local ordinary can permit a marriage to be celebrated in another suitable place.

§3. A marriage between a Catholic party and a non-baptized party can be celebrated in a church or in another suitable place.**

So I suppose it’s “OK” to have an outdoor ceremony, if the location is both “suitable” and permitted by the bishop. Cool.
 
Sorry if this breaks the page… But I think this is pretty beautiful. Taking your vows in God’s house before His altar just has an air of…rightness…to it.

 
Bookcat said:
RAIN 🙂

(Could not resist…)
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What happened in the Philippines is that there is investments made into parishes and chapels that get used for weddings more often. So that even a garden wedding can’t compare. That photo I posted is a small chapel on top of a hill that is within a compound that is used for retreats. What you see in the photo is already 80% of the chapel. It became so popular for weddings and it also has public Mass twice on Sundays.
 
Back in 1996 when I was younger and ignorant of my faith my first cousin wanted to get married on the beach off the Jersey shore. He had a difficult time finding a priest who would offer the Mass and conduct the wedding. Finally after much searching, he finally found a priest. They Mass was offered in a tent on the beach. They are still married, I assume happily by all accounts. I am not sure I would attend that wedding today…
 
lutherlic said:
Father Serpa addresses this topic in an AAA piece on the topic.

This is similar to those asking to be married on a cruise ship. This article entitled
Vatican to publish guidelines for cruise ship chaplains explains new rules for that.
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I understand and respect Father Serpa’s answer, but a follow up question would be why celebrate the Blessed Sacrament outside of the house if God? 🤷

It’s the Holiest of the 7 sacraments and yet I have been to more than a handful of masses held outside of a Church setting. I know for a fact Masses are also held on cruise ships quite often.

It would seem that if exceptions are made for the celebrating Mass outside of a church it would not be such a major issues to celebrate a Catholic marriage outdoors (with the Bishop’s permission of course).
 
Just a quick piece of advice.

Edit the size of your pictures before you upload them to a thread.

As pictures of a too big size distort the thread and cause the need for sideways scrolling.
 
BradleyScott said:
Even if one could say it’s great to be in the presence of Christ in the Eucharist, don’t we carry the Host out of the sanctuary to those who can’t make it to Church… …?
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Right, for those who can’t make it to Church.
 
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