Outside looking in

[Fogwalker]

I am one of about 4 Catholics in their 20s who attend my church, which has a weekly Mass attendance of several hundred people. The overwhelming majority of my peers here who go to church at all belong to two Protestant churches nearby with large young adult populations that minister heavily to young adults.

My Catholic church offers service projects, prayer opportunities, Bible studies, and all the rest just like the other Protestant churches do. But when I go to these activities at my own parish, no matter how welcoming everyone is, the few young adults who participate are always inherently out of place because we are such a minority trying to relate to people who are at such different places in their lives than we are.

I have a nearly impossible time convincing people my age to get involved at my church, because there is such an active ministry at the other churches. I’ve looked into other Catholic churches in the area but the demographics are the same at all of them. To paraphrase St. Paul, the example that our faith communities give to other people is the most powerful form of evangelization that we have. In my area, the witness that we project is that of a Catholic faith whose young people left to go to these other churches.

How do I overcome that?

 

[WFS5801]

In my area, the witness that we project is that of a Catholic faith whose young people left to go to these other churches.

How do I overcome that?

I don’t know. I’ve only attended SSPX and FSSP Masses, and they’ve always had a high percentage of young people. Are you in an depressed area where a lot of the younger people are forced to move to find decent jobs?

 

[Monte_RCMS]

Absorb as much as you can from the Catholic study groups. Buy the books and read them.

What will happen over time is that people you age will take notice of your continuous attendance at the Catholic programs and they will start to ask questions … perhaps small ones or perhaps with some sarcasm attached, which is merely defensive.

But you will be in a position to sow some valuable seeds.

You may feel lonesome … that what I am seeing and reading is that, willing or not, you are being led towards a leadership role … perhaps not in a big loud splashy flashy sort of way … but in a quiet way, you will develop into the kind of person that people can turn to and will want to turn to when they want some answers.

If you can, attend daily Mass.

And say a daily Rosary.

Pray always. Every minute.

Ask Jesus to be your Friend and Companion and ask the Holy Spirit to provide direction and guidance.

 

[Fogwalker]

I live in an area where jobs are leaving and young people are leaving to follow them. Consequently, many of the high school and college aged people at my church leave town and do not come back. It is the same at the other churches, but they have a much larger pool to draw from in the first place and the losses aren’t as noticable.

Engaging people about faith is the entire problem. Because the other churches have such established young adult ministries, no one from those churches ever asks me anything about my faith. The Catholic churches here have a stereotype in the Protestant community of “only looking out for their own” when it comes to ministry (words of a Protestant minister, not mine). So these people regularly invite me to participate in their events but are never interested in the reasons why I decline. I think they assume that I’m another example of Catholic sticks-in-the-mud who aren’t willing to look outside the box. I fit their stereotype so they have no reason to question what I do.

Ask and they shall receive, but they never ask and I don’t see a reason why they would start anytime soon. Even if I work hard to set a solid Christian example, to their churches’ credit, their church leaders already set a high Christian standard in terms of service to others and dedication to loving God. I don’t see a way to separate myself from that pack in a way that others would notice a difference.

 

[marica_mandic]

I am one of about 4 Catholics in their 20s who attend my church, which has a weekly Mass attendance of several hundred people. The overwhelming majority of my peers here who go to church at all belong to two Protestant churches nearby with large young adult populations that minister heavily to young adults.

My Catholic church offers service projects, prayer opportunities, Bible studies, and all the rest just like the other Protestant churches do. But when I go to these activities at my own parish, no matter how welcoming everyone is, the few young adults who participate are always inherently out of place because we are such a minority trying to relate to people who are at such different places in their lives than we are.

I have a nearly impossible time convincing people my age to get involved at my church, because there is such an active ministry at the other churches. I’ve looked into other Catholic churches in the area but the demographics are the same at all of them. To paraphrase St. Paul, the example that our faith communities give to other people is the most powerful form of evangelization that we have. In my area, the witness that we project is that of a Catholic faith whose young people left to go to these other churches.

How do I overcome that?

Spread the catholic faith is something very important.
I want to have realy good knowledge of catholic faith,and then I can in every situation make good move, so then can other seen thet is the best way of being satisfaid person is to behaviour self by rouls of catholic faith.

 

[Edward_H]

Well another idea is to not spend much of your time socializing with identifiable “religious groups”, Catholic or Protestant. Spend some time but not a lot.

Instead take your Catholic spirit and get into other social and substantial projects…non denominational, or completely secular service projects, yes.

Bring your smile, your self-donation, your humility, your joy, the fruits from the Eucharist, your natural spirit of service, and poverty…bring all those to some secular group. Live your faith, strongly, quietly, and cheerfully, there, amid these other people.

Over some months you will develop new friendships…and eventually and very naturally these friendships will create opportunities for more substantial discussions…and you can quietly, almost unnoticeably, begin to reveal the Reason for your hope, your joy.

But it will be a long and worthy project.

 

[InternetWoman]

Have you considered talking to the Pastor? But don’t just go with the problem, consider coming with a willingness to provide a solution. Meaning suggest the creation (by you) of “Young Catholics Together” (or something) group. Try something easy - maybe just a social group where you order pizza, rent a “Catholic” movie and have a discussion after. Do it once a month and see how it grows. Then, once you have a firm group of young Catholics, offer to “help” some of the larger groups. Get a “youngsters” session for the Bible study, etc.

Can’t hurt to try.

 

[jfmarm81]

Have you considered talking to the Pastor? But don’t just go with the problem, consider coming with a willingness to provide a solution. Meaning suggest the creation (by you) of “Young Catholics Together” (or something) group. Try something easy - maybe just a social group where you order pizza, rent a “Catholic” movie and have a discussion after. Do it once a month and see how it grows. Then, once you have a firm group of young Catholics, offer to “help” some of the larger groups. Get a “youngsters” session for the Bible study, etc.

Can’t hurt to try.

This is a good idea. I am actually thinking about doing something similar in my parish. A friend of mine has started a young couples group at her parish and it seems to be doing well. I am trying to clear some days off of my schedule so I can attend an event with my wife to get an idea of how many people are attending and how well-received it is. Yes, this is definitely a good idea.

 

[Fogwalker]

Bring your smile, your self-donation, your humility, your joy, the fruits from the Eucharist, your natural spirit of service, and poverty…bring all those to some secular group. Live your faith, strongly, quietly, and cheerfully, there, amid these other people.
QUOTE]

I love this idea in principle. But in practice, I’m far from a model Catholic. I want to be! But I’m not there yet. One of the big reasons I’d like some Catholic fellowship in the first place is to have a peer support group of sorts as I work on that. So it’s kind of a catch-22.

I have talked to my pastor about this. He fully supports young adult activities if I organized them. The problem is the initial numbers. There are only a handful of young adults active in our parish to draw from. The few of us that there are already get lunch after Mass most weeks, which is nice, but not quite cutting it for us.

I’d love to join up with other nearby parishes, but they don’t have organized young adult activities either. That is a problem that grows on itself, because with no established program and me being unfamiliar with their parishes, I don’t even know who to call to organize other parishes.

I am thinking about asking the pastor if I can organize a young adult Bible study after getting a few young adults at my church on board. Then we’d advertise it at other local Catholic churches and see what happens. Thoughts?

 

[mcrow]

This is a problem in the Church, I think.

I’m 33 and my wife and I are among the youngest adults at our Parish that regularly attend mass.

We do have a fair number young people but they are all there with parents and under age.

Personally, I think the issue is that kids see the Catholic Church as too restricting at an age where they are “sowing their wild oats”. What I mean is that intellectually young people between 18-30 tend to spend a lot of time trying to find themselves and think that the Catholic Church does not allow this because it’s to restrictive. Obviously, this isn’t true but I think that’s the perception.

You may notice that RCIA classes are normally made up of 30+ year old people, the age when people have settled into life and have wisened up a bit.

I think the much more liberal Protestant churches tend to appeal to young people because they tend to be more charismatic and pop culture oriented. younger peopl are much more easily swayed by charisma and pop culter (pop music, more showy…ect).

Later in life when people begin to understand what faith and Catholic values are really about is the time we start seeing some of those people come back to us.

 

[InternetWoman]

I am thinking about asking the pastor if I can organize a young adult Bible study after getting a few young adults at my church on board. Then we’d advertise it at other local Catholic churches and see what happens. Thoughts?

Great idea. There are lots of good Catholic resources for Bible study. I personally like the Navarre study guide. It is VERY faithful to the Church’s teachings. It is also very good at explaining what is going on and how it relates to actually living the faith. It is oriented around particular books of the Bible. If you want one that follows the Mass readings you might try “God’s Word Today.” It comes with meditations that may help with discussions.

You can’t go wrong with spending time with God’s word!

 

[karow]

I have a nearly impossible time convincing people my age to get involved at my church, because there is such an active ministry at the other churches. I’ve looked into other Catholic churches in the area but the demographics are the same at all of them. To paraphrase St. Paul, the example that our faith communities give to other people is the most powerful form of evangelization that we have. In my area, the witness that we project is that of a Catholic faith whose young people left to go to these other churches.

How do I overcome that?

I like another poster’s idea of a Young Catholics Together club.

The only other thing I can add is commiseration. A couple of months ago our priest devoted his homily to why the Church seems to lose so many people during their college years. Well, one reason could be what you described: a dearth of ministries aimed at the 19-25 y.o. crowd. Our parish has lots of stuff for the little ones, a Bible study group for high school kids, and the next ministry up age-wise is a group for stay-at-home-moms. There’s zilch for college-aged kids/young adults. And we live in a town that’s full of Protestant churches that have active ministries for this age group. The one just down the street from our house advertises its Christian singles/dating activities all the time. A family from my husband’s work is Mormon, and we’ve had conversations with them in which they said it was difficult not to stay connected with their faith as they entered adulthood because of all of the ministries/groups/social activities their church has.

 

[Michael0993]

I

So these people regularly invite me to participate in their events but are never interested in the reasons why I decline. I t.

I know what your going through with this. I’m a senior in high school and my parish is blessed with an active youth group. But a large amount of my peers attend protestant or New age church’s. My honest advice? When they invite you go!!! I am a devout Catholic and if I’m invited to an event at a different church, as long as it doesn’t interfere with my Catholic obligations I attend! I find as an outsider they attempt to evangelize me! So of course I turn the tables on them!! I challenge what they say, and have actually got a few thinking. Thats my advice! I’ll pray for you!!!

God bless!!!

 

[Manny_DeStefano]

Our parish is comprised primarily of seasoned Catholics, that is in an age group that is a bit beyond young adult. When young adults attend mass, it is usually during one of then following events: preparation for nuptuals; a child is receiving instruction for First REconcilliation and Communion; a child is preparing for Confirmation. As a member of the finance councel, I have discussed this at length with our pastor and with members of our parish council. We have a very bright and outgoing Deacon who will be ordained in a few weeks, and thank the Lord, it appears that he will be assigned to our parish. He has ideas to reach out to the post high school through 30’s set to bring them to the faith that they went through the motions to attend “had to” because mom and dad said so. So many younger people are spirtually hungry, but religion and all those rules are not to their liking. What Deacon is working to crerate is an environment of the joy and fulfillment that can only be found in Jesus Christ, to fill the emptyness that they experience. We will be exploring a more updated music ministry, seeking to enlist the musical talents of the many young musicians and singers who attend the local high school and perform so beautifly. We are working on a Catholic singles organization, the type of younger social grouping that many of the protestant churches in our area are sponsoring. One of our Eucharistic monisters created a softball team to play against other churches and civic organizations - we do not fare well, but it has been a means of attracting younger people who find out that the catholic Church is not all that stuffy and rule ridden, but a place to find fellowshipo wityh like minded people and it opens the doors to the Lord. My youngest daughter, a HS junior, is working on setting up a soccer league among the county churches. We need to think outside the box to find ways to fulfill needs for younger people and use those vehicles to reveal what we are as Catholics, presenting an inviting demeanor and the great experience we have with Jesus.

 

[Maria_Aurea]

I am one of about 4 Catholics in their 20s who attend my church, which has a weekly Mass attendance of several hundred people. The overwhelming majority of my peers here who go to church at all belong to two Protestant churches nearby with large young adult populations that minister heavily to young adults.

My Catholic church offers service projects, prayer opportunities, Bible studies, and all the rest just like the other Protestant churches do. But when I go to these activities at my own parish, no matter how welcoming everyone is, the few young adults who participate are always inherently out of place because we are such a minority trying to relate to people who are at such different places in their lives than we are.

I have a nearly impossible time convincing people my age to get involved at my church, because there is such an active ministry at the other churches. I’ve looked into other Catholic churches in the area but the demographics are the same at all of them. To paraphrase St. Paul, the example that our faith communities give to other people is the most powerful form of evangelization that we have. In my area, the witness that we project is that of a Catholic faith whose young people left to go to these other churches.

How do I overcome that?

Have you tried to form a group of young people within the parish like the Antiochs, The Patricians etc.

In our parish we have the Junior Legion of Mary who are from 5 years old to 18 years old. We have one group from 5-11 years and from 12 up till they turn 18 years respectively. Both groups can relate to each other and the older ones are more involved in spiritual like bible /spiritual reading encouraging people to attend mass, adoration and faith sharing with both catholics and non-catholics to name a few. They also participate in parish activities whenever they can. When they turn 18, they can then join the senior Legion of Mary.

The Antioch’s member I think are from 16 or 18 years old. These group does group discussions about the faith which have more mature topics and some fellowship involves not only within the parish groups but also with other parishes. Lately, they even had a band competition with other groups.

The Patricians is also the same thing and this one is also part of the Legion of Mary activity. This involves from young and old and it worked very well.

Have you ever discussed this with your parish priest? Joining other religion is not the solution to your problem. You will be amazed at how many parish groups you can start with young people. We have several church choirs formed by the Antiochs and other young people in the parish. It may not be easy to start with but in every endeavour, the challenge is always part of it. You do your part and leave the rest to God and eventually, you will succeed.

 

[puzzleannie]

I am one of about 4 Catholics in their 20s who attend my church, which has a weekly Mass attendance of several hundred people. The overwhelming majority of my peers here who go to church at all belong to two Protestant churches nearby with large young adult populations that minister heavily to young adults.

t?

if you want activities for your age group, make it your business to contact the other 4 people and start something. Catholics can have any parish they want if they are willing to become involved, and also to do what Protestants do almost universally, tithe to pay for salaried ministers and other staff and programs.

 

[DrPiano]

I’m (happily) sorry I can’t relate to the OP and some of the other comments because I go to a vibrant, growing Catholic church that has a wide range of ages including a substantial young adult population - as do many of the churches in my area.

What I can do is give and reiterate a few suggestions that I’ve seen work in our area.

1. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the idea of a young adult bible study. Even if just a handful of you start it, that’s a start. Then, like you said, advertise at other parishes. Perhaps, once a month, you could attend some of those other parishes so you can make connections with other young adults and personally invite them. If you have a regular meeting, you have something to invite them to. If it’s good, they might invite their friends. And before you know it you’ll go from a handful to much more than a handful.
2. I love the idea of getting together to watch a Catholic movie. Perhaps you make this a once a month event. Once the bible study is going, it might be easier (as people may be coming to that), but again, get the event going, make a few connections at other parishes, and invite them (see above).

Other ideas: Theology on Tap (popular program that seems to be springing up. Basically the idea is to get people [perhaps your priest] to come speak to a small gathering of young adults at a place like a pub - although depending on age, the venue can be modified - about some aspect of theology. Example: Theology of the Body, the Sacraments, moral theology, etc. etc. Find out what questions your group has and find someone who can faithfully address it), game nights, Eucharistic Adoration (there’s a group in the area that has organized a HIGHLY ATTENDED holy hour on Sunday evenings followed by about an hour of fellowship. Young adults come from all the parishes in the area for it.), book studies, prayer retreats, service projects (form a Habitat for Humanity team perhaps?).

Above all I’d say start by seeking to feed the needs of the Catholic young adults in your area. Once those are being fed and the group is growing (from your parish and other parishes) THEN you guys can brainstorm about big events that you might invite your non-Catholic friends to (perhaps something that they won’t find threatening but they’ll see that there are young Catholics having fun).

I’d caution you about going to their events with one caveat. If you’re strong in your faith and know you’re not going to be swayed by their glitz, then it might be ok, especially if you know your faith enough to defend it when you get challenged. But if you’re not, I wouldn’t recommend it. It would be so easy to start going and then start believing what they say… Being a former Protestant and having helped run a lot of those types of events, I know they really turn up the heat in an attempt to snag people.

Hang in there. And above all Pray. Ask God to help you find one really good idea that He can build on and then run with it. Pray for the strength to keep going despite the encouragement. And Pray that while you’re doing this he’ll widen your circle of Catholic friends. He often answers those prayers