Overnight Traveling Couple

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Hello! So my boyfriend and I have a long distance relationship. We’re both 21. I get to see him once every half a year and when we see each other, we want to make that time count. This December he and I are taking a trip out of state, and while doing so wanted to respect the church’s teaching of being chaste.
My only question is about the exact arrangements. We’ve looked for hotel rooms, Airbnb, motels, and many are sketchy or already booked around the time he’s arriving in the US. We found an Airbnb condo that does have two rooms there (like I said, we agreed to be separated). We don’t even have to meet with the host because they give us a code to unlock the door. That way they won’t get any preconceived notions about us.

I’ve discussed this with my parents and they trust us enough not to cross the boundary of sleeping together and agreed that it’s not immoral for us to stay in the condo.
I did, however, want to get more (name removed by moderator)ut about the topic. This is my first boyfriend and I want to be sure I have a relationship God will be pleased with 🙂

Thank you very much!
God bless.
 
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Much harder to be faithful to your decision if both of you sleep in the same place, with nobody else around.
 
There is nothing inherently wrong with traveling with him and staying in a two bedroom accommodation, whether you meet the owners or not.
 
I guess it partly depends on how well you know the young man.
Have you spent much time with him in real life? Or just online? With other people, or mainly just the two of you when you do see him?
I guess partly my question is why are you going out of state, instead of just spending time in your hometown, where you could be at home?
 
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Yes, I’ve spent a lot of time with him in real life. The reason we’re going out of state is because he doesn’t get to visit the US very often so he would like to explore more of the country rather than just seeing my city. We’re only going out for four days. He’ll be spending the majority of the time with me and my family for Christmas.
 
Take along friends. Have a women’s room and a men’s room. We often learn more about other people when we travel in a group.
 
How much time have you spent discussing boundaries with your boy friend. If he is serious about leading a pure life, then for a few days I think your risk of falling into serious sin is low. Does he respect your boundaries when you are together? You don’t have to answer but these are question you might ask yourself. It is the slippery slope where you gradually slide into sin that you want to avoid.
 
Thank you for pointing that out. I think that’s very helpful. I’m going to answer in case it may give insight to others who may be answering the question also. We’ve spoken heavily about where our values lie and he does respect my boundaries. He comes from a different culture, so when we first started dating, he didn’t completely understand why I want to be separated (though he’s Catholic too). Even if he didn’t understand, he still respected me. Since we’ve been dating, he’s beginning to realize how beautiful waiting is.
 
It’s good to know the rules.
It’s better to have wisdom. In wisdom you know the limitations of your virtue and don’t place yourself in situations that are technically within the rules but ripe for indulgence.

Like others have said, take other people with you and/or set firm boundaries that will keep you on track.
My own younger life is littered with situations of self deception where I tempted my own virtue and lost.
 
Travel accommodations are not a moral issue.

The only moral issue is whether you are placing yourselves in a position of temptation. Only you and he can discern whether you have sufficient respect for each other’s boundaries.
 
PatK63 said:
You will never regret waiting until you are married.
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This!!! I cannot tell you how glad I am to have waited for marriage!

I did stay in a B&B with my fiancé before we were married. It went fine - we were chaste. This said, you need to be dead serious within yourself about WHY you want to be chaste and save sex for marriage! Because you may be tempted. In fact, just assume you will be tempted and have a plan. How much physical closeness until you say “enough”? What if you and he both want more? Decide ahead of time. Do not assume you will be thinking straight in the moment. Do not assume he will be either. Bonus if ya’ll are both on the same page, but I’ve had so many ladies tell me he caved in first and “wanted more” in the moment. Just be prepared.
 
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