Pagans, Catholics & the wife!

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Hello again Friends,

I’m going through a bit of a crisis at the moment and I’m looking for thoughts & opinions.
You may be aware that I’m a Pagan with Catholic intensions!

Last night I told my Pagan group that I will be withdrawing from the organisational role that I do, It was a difficult night as I felt that I was leaving and leaving some good friends. Truth is that I’ll be
phasing that part of my life out over time. I was asked many times about where my spirituality was going and I said that I needed to broaden my horizons to progress my self etc. Truth again is that I’m interested in the Catholic church and it was best that I kept that under my hat, for now anyway!

This morning I opened myself up a little to my wife, I told her what I did the night before and explained my intensions with the Catholic church. It was’nt good, she said to me ‘your not a Catholic’ and then begun to tell me that it would not suit me and listed many reasons why. As always, you take it in and decided to talk to her again later when she calmed down.

I did manage to talk to her later and it did improve, well now she knows and that brings a little relief to me. It seems sometimes that most of my living is done in secret but now I can’t deal with that stress anymore as it causes no end of mental anguish, alongth with the constant anxiety etc.

A friend called me the other day a ‘fringe dweller’, which sums me up perfectly, till now? I’m always getting involved and then pulling out when it feels I’m getting in too deep. Another fear. I can’t live like that and I’m looking for structure in my life so I can gain substance from it rather than flitting between one thing & another. I need a career that I don’t get scared or stress out about then decide to run away from it.
I’m looking for Godly guidance.

I hope my pursuit of understanding the Catholic Church will bring me at last some firm ground, somewhere to build a healthly life, mind & body.
My prayers are there for all regardless of race or religeon and I have love for all. (especially chili chocolate!)

Love, Graham.
 
I’m having a similar problem.
I’ve been Pagan for the last 8 years but I am finding that it is not a fulfilling as it was when I was 15.
Lately I’ve just felt compelled to go to Church and pray and read the Bible. I, at the moment, am in a leader position of the Pagan group at my college I can’t even think of the response I would get from them if I told them I wanted to leave the group, it would completely fall apart. I feel like I’m abandoning my community.
My parents and boyfriend would probably think I’m completely crazy if I told them.
I don’t know what to do either, I guess I’m not much help. 🤷
 
My ignorance knows no bounds some days. I never knew there were pagan groups. I always just thought it was a general term for those without religious convictions. I didn’t realize it was “organized.”

I’ve read lots of conversion stories here on CAF and I look forward to seeing yours. As, I too, converted to Catholicism (but from being a protestant) these stories always are of great interest to me.

Please keep us up to date on your journey. If we can be of assistance, let us know! Do you need to read about a particular aspect of the faith? Want to read about others that have converted with similar backgrounds or views? There are a ton of books, artilcles and posts out there we can point you to.

Peace be with you!
 
Anybody who loves chili chocolate has to be OK in my book. :coffee:
 
OutinChgoburbs said:
Anybody who loves chili chocolate has to be OK in my book. :coffee:
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Agreed, and welcome to both of you.

(To those reading with thoughts similar to newbetx about Pagans just being non-Christian, or really non-religious, I believe the two folks on this thread are actually practitioners of hermetic magic. Am I correct OP?)

Well here’s a bonus should you make your way over to our church – we are very ritualistic in our practices and that should appeal to your creature-comforts. 👍 Sometimes the rituals are the hardest thing for converting-protestants to deal with. That and Mary. Oh and the Saints. But that’s another thread. 😛

Have either of you spoke to a priest at a local parish about your desires, and your calling home to the church? If they are not in charge of the Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults they will send you onto the RCIA director, and your Christian education and indoctrination will begin there. This is a long process, as there is much to learn. Of course there is some things that will need to be sorted out, like previous marriages/divorces (so PLEASE be honest about all of this when you talk to the priest. I have seen one woman not be able to be baptized during the Easter Vigil because she had been dishonest about a previous divorce, feeling “it didn’t matter.” Ahhhh but it does. )

Also, a good starting point about learning the very basics of our faith is “Catholicism for Dummies” – not implying at all that you are dummies; but this is a great place to start to learn simple history, practices, beliefs and the Sacraments of our church.

Again, welcome, glad to have you. The call of God for you to come home is a strong one is it not? I pray for peace and ease as you sort this out and work your way home. I will also pray your families don’t completely wig-out and are kind about your conversion.

God Bless you both!
:signofcross:

If you have any questions, please feel free to ask!
 
Grimble said:
Last night I told my Pagan group that I will be withdrawing from the organisational role that I do, It was a difficult night as I felt that I was leaving and leaving some good friends. .
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welcome home, no matter how long it takes for you to get here

only posted to chuckle at this, because so many times people have told me the reason they rejected conventional religion is because there is too much “organization” and structure so it is refreshing to see even your group requires it.

It will not be an easy road if your spouse is not moving along with you. If you search on the evangelization forum there is some testimony from folks with similar experience where spouse was not on board with their changing spirituality
 
So Pagans have a church and stuff? Do they take up a collection? Walk around in snuggies? I always think of dungeon and dragon stuff when it comes to pagans. Shows what I know, and when you hear a Catholic say “pagan” its usually not in warm tone.

Glad y’all are here.
 
BamaRider said:
So Pagans have a church and stuff? Do they take up a collection? Walk around in snuggies? I always think of dungeon and dragon stuff when it comes to pagans. Shows what I know, and when you hear a Catholic say “pagan” its usually not in warm tone.

Glad y’all are here.
Click to expand...
Well, if they do take up a collection, we can give our new inquirer some ideas on what to use to collect it.

http://forums.catholic-questions.org/showpost.php?p=4636246&postcount=36

And for our new friend:
View attachment 4958
 
I’m having a similar problem.
I’ve been Pagan for the last 8 years but I am finding that it is not a fulfilling as it was when I was 15.
Lately I’ve just felt compelled to go to Church and pray and read the Bible. I, at the moment, am in a leader position of the Pagan group at my college I can’t even think of the response I would get from them if I told them I wanted to leave the group, it would completely fall apart. I feel like I’m abandoning my community.
My parents and boyfriend would probably think I’m completely crazy if I told them.
I don’t know what to do either, I guess I’m not much help
Click to expand...
Psst! Littlesparky! A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step!

Seriously, once you start getting involved, once you tell people where you’re headed, it almost never turns out as bad as you’d thought. Things will change, yes, but life does that anyway, so why not lead that change in a direction you feel pulled?

Here’s that first step for you:
orgs.utulsa.edu/newman/rosary.html (Start by clicking on ‘next bead’)
 
Graham, you are reminder that God in His goodness also has a sense of humour! You’re doing well with the challenge that He has given you in beckoning you to His Church from your pagan practice and beliefs. I imagine you’ve some good Catholic ancestor who has been beseiging God for your conversion!

And chilli chocolate is delectable…but then any chocolate, especially dark chocolate is good in my tastebud opinion!

You wife has an interesting journey of understanding ahead of her. I ask God to help you both grow together with this new direction for your life.

Keeping you both in my prayers…Trishie
 
littlesparky said:
I’m having a similar problem.
I’ve been Pagan for the last 8 years but I am finding that it is not a fulfilling as it was when I was 15.
Lately I’ve just felt compelled to go to Church and pray and read the Bible. I, at the moment, am in a leader position of the Pagan group at my college I can’t even think of the response I would get from them if I told them I wanted to leave the group, it would completely fall apart. I feel like I’m abandoning my community.
My parents and boyfriend would probably think I’m completely crazy if I told them.
I don’t know what to do either, I guess I’m not much help. 🤷
Click to expand...
I don’t think you will ever abandon the community in that you, above all, will be well-placed to pray for them and so they will have this great gift that perhaps no one else of their acquaintance can offer them…that of a devoted child of God praying for your dear misled friends.

The Lord will be patient with you and will give you the courage and faith you need. I can imagine what a kind and gentle heart you have in not wishing to bewilder or abandon your friends, even though someone Higher calls you to a higher service of them.

They might not understand, but in calling you the Him, our dear Lord is creating a channel of love and prayer and grace for their souls. And even if it takes a lifetime for them to find Him, they will at the end through the prayer god places in your heart for them.

With love, Trishie
 
You are very brave 🙂

I wish I knew what to say…I think I would try to do all I can in secret like you are doing now though, just so you can have the peace you need to discern and search. Reading good Catholic books - I really, really, really, really (did I say really?) recommend ***“The Life of Saint Teresa of Avila.” ***

When I was younger, I became interested in paganism. But when I read that book, it was like reading the truth and impacted me so much.

Friends I had who stayed involved in pagan beliefs did knock my beliefs, but it was nothing horrible. But now, time has passed and I look at the fruits of their lives and I am amazed. I do not think they have ever found true happiness in their beliefs, and if anything seem to have been drug down.

I was a “fringe dweller” too for awhile - then I just jumped in. When your ready, jump in - got to RCA, get involved with other Catholics, and go for it 🙂
:blessyou:
 
P.S. I agree with the poster who mentioned there must be a good Catholic ancestor praying for you 👍
 
“Pagan” is too broad a term to understand where you’re coming from. Are you a Wiccan, or a beliver in ancient European gods, or something entirely different?
 
Instead of calling yourself a pagan, why don’t you call yourself a truth seeker.

**John 14:6 Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. **

**And that’s really Catholic. **
 
Hi and welcome. I am a cradle Catholic but fell away for a long, long time. During that time I married an agnostic. When I felt compelled (yes, strong word, but very true) to return to Holy Mother Church, it was a difficult transition for everyone. At first my husband didn’t care because I didn’t understand all that was involved. When we realized what it meant to our lives he resisted strongly. As time passed though and he realized that I was never “going back”, he relaxed a bit. Now he tolerates all my statues (I let him get away with calling them Catholic action figures and he has put a tentative limit on the number for now), my frequent attenance at Mass on all Sundays and Holy Days and even recently I have added First Saturdays, he does not make crude jokes about the Church and priests and religious anymore, and he even not only respects that I say grace but he even makes the sign of the cross with us and knows the prayer, prays with me and I found out when I’m not home for dinner he says it for the kids.

I’m telling you this because I know the first part of your conversion will be difficult for you and your wife, don’t force it on her but don’t completely hide it either, keep practicing unapologetically, don’t give up, pray and stay. I’m a bit like you in that quitting seems like a good option sometimes, but I know I can never quit God again. Without Him my life was a mess. With Him, it has it’s difficult times, but I have a peace and comfort that I have never had before. Once He calls you, you can’t help but go with Him.

As for your wife, I heard something the other day that I am going to use for my husband. Don’t pray for her conversion because then you would be asking God to interfere with her free will and He won’t do that. Instead, pray that she will have the desire to convert. I got that from Catholic radio, I can’t remember who said it, but I can’t take credit for that although it seems like great advice.
Ok, my post is way too long. Hope I didn’t loose you. God Bless!
 
Welcome!

So glad to hear of folks investigating the Catholic faith. I’ll tell you a couple of things that were crucial to me in my reconversion.
  1. The Catholic faith teaches that all humanity is basically good, but fallen. The more you ponder this, the more you see how genius an insight it is. Most religions oversimplify and denote humanity “good” or “evil.” But ours is the explanation that best fits the facts of history. We have both good and bad within us because we were created to be totally good, but blew it which had the effect of infecting us with some inclinations towards evil. From Genesis to Revelation and all of Church history, ours is a story of how this plays out.
  2. Catholicism also does a supernaturally good job of walking the razor edge balance between emphasis on the spiritual and embrace of the physical. So many religions divide the two as if they were incompatible. Not here.
The more you learn, the harder it is to deny that we really are the crowning creation of a loving and omnipotent God - one that still loves us in spite of all our goofs, flubs, dumb moves, selfishness and greed. He sees beyond all that because he knows what we can and will be once his Grace is done fixing us up. Come and get it!
 
Grimble said:
Hello again Friends,

I’m going through a bit of a crisis at the moment and I’m looking for thoughts & opinions.
You may be aware that I’m a Pagan with Catholic intensions!

Last night I told my Pagan group that I will be withdrawing from the organisational role that I do, It was a difficult night as I felt that I was leaving and leaving some good friends. Truth is that I’ll be
phasing that part of my life out over time. I was asked many times about where my spirituality was going and I said that I needed to broaden my horizons to progress my self etc. Truth again is that I’m interested in the Catholic church and it was best that I kept that under my hat, for now anyway!

This morning I opened myself up a little to my wife, I told her what I did the night before and explained my intensions with the Catholic church. It was’nt good, she said to me ‘your not a Catholic’ and then begun to tell me that it would not suit me and listed many reasons why. As always, you take it in and decided to talk to her again later when she calmed down.

I did manage to talk to her later and it did improve, well now she knows and that brings a little relief to me. It seems sometimes that most of my living is done in secret but now I can’t deal with that stress anymore as it causes no end of mental anguish, alongth with the constant anxiety etc.

A friend called me the other day a ‘fringe dweller’, which sums me up perfectly, till now? I’m always getting involved and then pulling out when it feels I’m getting in too deep. Another fear. I can’t live like that and I’m looking for structure in my life so I can gain substance from it rather than flitting between one thing & another. I need a career that I don’t get scared or stress out about then decide to run away from it.
I’m looking for Godly guidance.

I hope my pursuit of understanding the Catholic Church will bring me at last some firm ground, somewhere to build a healthly life, mind & body.
My prayers are there for all regardless of race or religeon and I have love for all. (especially chili chocolate!)

Love, Graham.
Click to expand...
I hope so, too…I’ll be praying for you. Also…don’t listen to what others choose to label you. Sounds like people in your life want to tell you who you are, and what you should or shouldn’t do. I would probably hold a little bit of my thoughts on following the path to Catholicism close to my vest, around people who you feel might be against it. I would open myself up to priests, and people who might be more open to at least hearing about your desire to explore. I wish you luck on your path–God’s gift to us is the journey to Him!🙂
 
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