Parenting Choices

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Xanthippe_Voorhees

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So I’m a “hands off” parent when it comes to playgrounds. The mall has a small indoor plaground for 6mo-4years. It has 4 rubberized play structures and walls with those bead mazes and mirrors and other little-kid friendly stuff.

I plunk toddler down and relax.

There are two 4yo boys also playing, and they are constantly getting annoyed, pushing each other and otherwise being 4 yo boys. They were on the older end of kids allowed in, but they are still kids.

One of the boys pushes my toddler–maybe intentionally–maybe not. She doesn’t cry, and is fine. Mother of the boy comes over and scolds him, so I do nothing.

This happens twice more, clearly intentional at this point. Again, little one is not crying and is completely unphased. Mother chided her kid both times. She’s not in their way…she’s just being a toddler, randomly walking around because…toddler.

She turns to me and goes, “Are you watching your kid???”

Me “Sorry, did she do something wrong?”

Her “Do you not see she’s getting pushed around?”

Me “She’ll learn”

Her son gets pushed by other boy and the moms both race to pry them apart. She goes, “some parents” and the other mom goes, “I know, right?”

So HER kid is being ill-behaved and It’s my issue for not “parenting”? She’s not crying, she’s not hitting and she wasn’t in their way or hogging one of the structures. She’s a toddler–she’s not going to understand “stay away from that mean boy”. And I’m not about to take her out of the play area whilst she’s perfectly happy because of some other kid.

I dunno.

This is why I hate playgrounds. Complex social rules I don’t get.
 
I’d be with you on this. I have much younger brothers and sisters and my mother sometimes tells me about parents coming to complain about some minor incident that happend in the neighbourhood. I think I’d be very very reluctant to go to some other parent and complain. Kids will sort this stuff out themselves.
 
I have to ask the OP, how old are you and how old was the other mother? One of my theories is that the helicopter parent came into being with late boomers and gerneration x parents. I, being right on that boundary, but with kids spanning 19 years, have been driven crazy by helicopter parents the entire time of raising kids. I am the extreme opposite of a helicopter parent (admittedly too much so at times) and have had countless events occur Iver the years that mirror yours. They make great party stories.
But, I see young parents today, the millineals, and I have hope the phenomena of helicopter parents is coming to an end. My daughter in law is not one at all, yet I am almost positive her mom epitimized the concept.
So:. You are n you twenties, the other mom was in her thirties? Am I guessing right?
 
tafan2 said:
w old are you and how old was the other mother? One of my theories is that the helicopter parent came into being with late boomers and gerneration x parents. I, being right on that boundary, but with kids spanning 19 years, have been driven crazy by helicopter parents the entire time of raising kids. I am the extreme opposite of a h
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Nope. We are all in our 30’s. (or the other moms aged poorly) The mother of the more aggressive boy was the youngest looking.
 
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