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Please delete this post.

 

[Fauken]

I don’t want to sound obtuse, so if I do, I apologize, but I’m confused. You mention spiritual direction in your post, but spiritual direction is not a psychological counseling service and I at least have never seen it marketed as such. It’s to help discern God’s will in your life. If someone is having real psychological issues, then the spiritual director should be telling them to find a psychologist. It’s not meant to take the place of a psychologist.

 

[DarkLight]

From what I have experienced and learned, I believe that a moderately competent psychologist could offer us tremendous help. My wife has no empathy and no ability to see outside of herself. In my opinion, her entire life experience is based upon a perception that the entire world is “doing unto her.”

Honestly, if it’s borderline personality disorder or something closely related - you don’t just need a “moderately competent psychologist.” Priests I think make the same error that very many other people in our society make, that of thinking you merely need to see a decent psychologist for any issue. This is as silly as thinking a decent doctor can handle anything from heart disease to asthma to diabetes to cancer.

Your average psychologist is equipped to handle mostly depression and anxiety. They are not equipped to handle the full range of possible conditions. Unfortunately I think this hits especially hard on people who want a catholic counselor or some other thing that may rule out most in the area.

 

[Irishmom2]

Priests are not psychologists, and don’t claim to be. People do not go to priests for psychological advice, but spiritual advice. If a person cannot tell that a family member needs psychological help, they cannot expect a stranger/or priest to recognize it. Too many people confuse asking a priest for spiritual help with psychological help.

OP, I am sorry you are going through this with your wife. You and your wife should keep trying counselors until you find one that helps. Sometimes it takes several to find one that you click with. There are websites that can help you find a Catholic therapist.

 

[Mrchatsworth]

I’m confused by your post and I perceive frustration at the priesthood that confuses me more. Where I live very few priests would be considered someone’s spiritual director. Most priests are not psychologists though some are. And most psychologist are not priests. And spiritual direction is not psychology. Though it is possible a moderately competent psychologist could help you really don’t know do you? Perhaps they could not help. But though I know you are frustrated I don’t think you are making a fair criticism…

 

[MamaJewel]

h
Hello, and welcome to CAF, dailystruggle2nd. I’m sorry you are suffering through a difficult marriage and understand your sentiment that priests should have a basic understanding of mental illness.

I agree that priests do need a better understanding of mental health issues. Priests would have to have some type of formal training to have a solid, well-rounded knowledge of mental health conditions. Because priests are concerned with the spiritual well-being of an individual’s soul, they often filter issues through a spiritual lens where applicable and since nobody’s perfect, there is often a spiritual aspect to an individual’s obstacle(s) in loving God and neighbor.

That said, if priests were more informed of mental health issues and the common situations that indicate a present mental health condition in an individual, they might be more willing to require that a person seek outside professional counseling as part of the spiritual direction.

 

[Ammi]

Sometimes both is required. Spiritual counseling and psychological counselling. And in order to be sure they dont contradict each other.

I dont like the idea of secular therapists without having a concern to balance psychology with the Catholic faith. I dont necessarily think that all secular therapists contradict the Catholic faith, but I do think some would see aspects of the Catholic faith itself as problematic.

Remember that a psychiatrist isnt trained in spiritual (Catholic) guidance.

 

[Ammi]

And psychologists are not equipped to handle Catholic pastoring.

 

[Irishmom2]

I agree, both together. Spiritual from a priest, psychological from a psychologist or psychiatrist.

 

[DarkLight]

It’s a difficult issue sometimes. Often what ends up happening in practice is that matters touching on both mental health and spirituality together get ignored entirely, because no one is comfortable dealing with them.