Poll: Are annulments to easily obtained?

  • Thread starter Thread starter timbo1980
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
As a person who has gone through an anullment, I would have to say that it is a very long and tedious process, but well worth every effort. Only the most committed person can endure the steps you must encounter. I wanted very much be able to receive the holy eucharist and it was devastating for me the years that I wasn’t allowed because I was not married in the church. No, anullments are not easily obtained!:nope:
 
Annulments probably appear to be easily obtained given the number, however, I would contend the reason the number of annulments probably seem so high is because of the lack of education about the sacrament and the faith in general. I do not think they are being abused.

I would say the issue probably isn’t as much about annulments – easy or not – as much as it is about how well we are educating people who are about to enter into the sacrament of Matrimony.

Education about the sacrament is more than just a few meetings with a priest and a compatibility test. I think the problem with divorce stems from deep within the lack of catechesis of young children.

What are we teaching them about the faith (or not teaching them)? What are we teaching them about the importance of choosing a mate – Not just someone you are attracted to – but choosing someone that will help you raise a holy family and get to Heaven?
 
40.png
kaj3:
I would say the issue probably isn’t as much about annulments – easy or not – as much as it is about how well we are educating people who are about to enter into the sacrament of Matrimony.

Education about the sacrament is more than just a few meetings with a priest and a compatibility test. I think the problem with divorce stems from deep within the lack of catechesis of young children.

What are we teaching them about the faith (or not teaching them)? What are we teaching them about the importance of choosing a mate – Not just someone you are attracted to – but choosing someone that will help you raise a holy family and get to Heaven?
Click to expand...
I think this is exactly the point–people ask why there are so many “marriages” which are invalid, and think the raw numbers mean there is something wrong with the back end (applicants for declaration of nullity getting what they applied for) when the real problem is on the front end (before the marriage is even attempted). Of course, the strengthened catechesis needs to begin long before the couple presents themselves as an engaged couple.
 
I agree with the above.

It isn’t that annulments are easy to obtain. Anyone who has been through the process will tell you they are MUCH more complicated then a divorce.

The number of annulments is a matter of the poor understanding of marriage in our culture NOT the abuse of annulments.
-D
 
i had to vote that i didn’t know… i personally know 4 that obtained annulments and they were anything but easy… the shortest one took 2 years, the longest 12 years… so in my experience and via the testimony of the 4 couples involed…{heck no} for want of a safer explitive…
 
I keep thinking of that Episcopalian lady who was married to a Kennedy (I think Joe Kennedy) in Massachutes. He left her and got an annulment. She fought the annulment to no avail. She may have even appealed it to Rome. I think they had been married like 18 years with several children. She was so frustrated that he got his annulment that she wrote a book trashing the Church.

It sounded like a sad case. It does make you scratch your head.
 
On what grounds does someone married 18 years with several kids file an annulment?
 
If I’m not mistaken, a study from the Archdiocese of Boston a few years ago determinied that many annulments are granted today vs a generation ago because many more are being *sought * than were a generation ago. I think the same study indicated that the impression that “everyone” who seeks annulment obtains one stems from very good screening, leading to those with no grounds being quashed early in the process. (Ie. you rarely hear of people petitioning for years and years and years and then being denied – though that does rarely happen)

(Or, I could be mistaken about either of the above points)
 
40.png
timbo1980:
On what grounds does someone married 18 years with several kids file an annulment?
Click to expand...
coersion… (shot gun wedding) (someone was pregnant at the time of the vows and pressure from the family forced marriage) at least in their mind… either way, when asked if they were there of free will the “yes” answer wan not honest, or more realistically, if there had been no pregnancy, they wouldn’t have been in front of the minister at all… lots of other grounds possible…
 
40.png
timbo1980:
On what grounds does someone married 18 years with several kids file an annulment?
Click to expand...
On the same grounds as any annulment. Grounds for annulment apply to the state of the affairs at the time of the marriage. Gathering evidence after 18 years might prove more problematic.
 
I think what it comes down to is alluded to at the end of that link to the Diocese of Boston.

Our culture seems to be moving away from a view of things being permanent and people are entering into marriage with this influencing them at the time of their vows and this seems to be being used as justification for granting annulments. Whether I agree with this or not I am not yet sure.
 
I don’t know why there are so many annulments. I guess one would have to say because there are so many null marriages.
But the ones I am familiar with have occurred with marriages of 20 - 30 years standing, often with several children. Why should that be happening?

On the other hand, I know of one “shotgun” wedding that occurred years ago in my USAF unit, when an officer’s daughter found herself pregnant by an airman. If anything, that one would have seemed like there was a lack of serious intention from the outset. Yet, when we met for a reunion some 25 years later, they were still married.

Then there was the Archie Bunker type who used to work in my office. He was constantly complaining about his wife. Every day, more complaints. We were all getting tired of it. One day, in the midst of one of his tirades, a co-worker said to him, “Well Joe, if you’re so unhappy with your wife, why don’t you just divorce her?”

That stopped him for a little while; then he replied, “Well,…I took her for better or worse.
For 50 years it was better. Now it’s worse.” They were still together when she died a few years later.

JimG
 
Applying for a decree of nullity (the proper term) is gut wrenching and one must do a lot of soul searching. One must write up a summary of courtship and marriage, find at least 3 witnesses that will agree to be interviewed, the petitioner must be interviewed (it’s like confession but worse and no absolution) then the whole thing must be judged not once but twice. Oh and your ex gets to put their 2 cents worth in too. Nice!

Not for the faint of heart! And no guarantee the decree will be issued and one still has to pay for the whole thing.

But was it worth it - you bet! To paraphrase a popular commercial:

Decree - $1200
Long distance phone calls rounding up witnesses $25
Gas driving back and forth to Adoration Chapel to pray, pray and pray some more $50
Computer paper and ink writing up summary and letters $25
Receiving Communion again - **PRICELESS!!! :love: **
 
Our annulment took about a year and a half to obtain. We were married 11 years. My wife promised to raise any children in my Catholic faith (she was protestant), but when our daughter was born, she broke that promise, and raised her in her church. That was one of the wedges that were driven between us, and one of the main reasons the annulment was granted. My present wife had to get one, too, even though she was not Catholic. The questions and the paperwork were anything but easy. But it was worth it, as we are both Catholics now.
 
40.png
Maria-Pia:
Applying for a decree of nullity (the proper term) is gut wrenching and one must do a lot of soul searching. One must write up a summary of courtship and marriage, find at least 3 witnesses that will agree to be interviewed, the petitioner must be interviewed (it’s like confession but worse and no absolution) then the whole thing must be judged not once but twice. Oh and your ex gets to put their 2 cents worth in too. Nice!

Not for the faint of heart! And no guarantee the decree will be issued and one still has to pay for the whole thing.

But was it worth it - you bet! To paraphrase a popular commercial:

Decree - $1200
Long distance phone calls rounding up witnesses $25
Gas driving back and forth to Adoration Chapel to pray, pray and pray some more $50
Computer paper and ink writing up summary and letters $25
Receiving Communion again - **PRICELESS!!! :love: **
Click to expand...
Maria-Pia:

Our anullments took 2 1/2 years.

I absolutely, positively, 100 percent agree with you especially,

**Receiving communion again – PRICELESS!!!😃 **
 
I personally have never heard of an annullment that wasn’t granted. Please correct me if I’m wrong.

There was an interesting article in the most recent issue of Crisis on this subject.

My husband and I were Pre-Cana leaders and, from what I have seen in our diocese, the program is not designed to help couples develop a Catholic marriage. I think that if people understand that marriage is for keeps and what it takes for a Catholic marriage, maybe the success rate would be higher.

Also, the same forces that operate in the secular world work against Catholic marriages, i.e., ABC, selfishness, etc.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top