Prayer Life

[Augustine]

How did your prayer life start?

I can’t say I have one. I do have a habit of praying, but my sinfulness and lack of resolve keep me from letting God’s grace to work in me.

It all started a couple of years ago when I figured that as I went to Mass weekly, I should also pray daily. Then I noticed this small church on my way to work, where I’d stop to say a Pater and a decade of Ave Marias in front of a Pieta. Over time, I learned the Salve Regina and added petitions to a few of my favorite saints.

After a few months, I started missing a routine prayer in the weekends, so I started saying the Rosay every week. It wasn’t until the past Lent that I decided to say the Rosary daily.

I still stop at that church before getting to work every day and I changed the petitions to the saints to a litany, after being awed at the litany said at JP2’s funeral.

Prayer is a gift from God, despite our unworthiness. But we must let Him work in us and cooperate with Him. Yet, how can I teach my kids to have a prayer life?

 

[canne]

A few years ago I had an event that happened in my life that completety changed my prayer life. I can honestly say that it has never been the same. My prayer life is much more personal now and I find myself much more willing and able to completetly give everything to the Lord in prayer. It is hard for me to explain, but I can tell you that before I do not think I was praying from the heart but now I do.

 

[DBT]

canne:

A few years ago I had an event that happened in my life that completety changed my prayer life. I can honestly say that it has never been the same. My prayer life is much more personal now and I find myself much more willing and able to completetly give everything to the Lord in prayer. It is hard for me to explain, but I can tell you that before I do not think I was praying from the heart but now I do.

Yes, this is how it happened for me.

Augustine:

Yet, how can I teach my kids to have a prayer life?

Hi Augustine - Long time no talk . . . hope all is going well.

Well the short answer is to let them see YOU praying. If you’re comfortable with prayer, then it will come naturally and won’t appear “forced” on your kids . . . as I’ve sometimes seen.

Lead by your quiet example and don’t make a big production out of it - kids see through that. If you perservere your kids will, over time, see that prayer is an integral part of who you are. Hopefully, they’ll recognize your fruits and want (maybe sub-conciously) the same thing for themselves.

Some examples from our household: My kids know I go to daily mass (even though they rarely join me) and they often see me praying the LOTH . . . sometimes they like to listen along. We pray the Rosary on the weekend . . . and my wife and I let each child lead a decade to get them involved. The younger ones love it, the older one’s grumble a bit as would be expected. We pray the Act of Charity together each morning when I drive them to school . . . again each kid gets their own day to lead the prayer.

And maybe most important, I always look for ways to teach the virtues in their daily activities - praising them for acts of kindness, generosity, patience etc. If I can tie it back to a Gospel message or life of a Saint so much the better. Virtue is the foundation on which a solid prayer life is built.

But for any of this to work, they have to see you walk-the-walk, not just talk-the-talk. I’ve learned that one the hard way

Oh well, just some random thoughts. Hope it helps . . . and I’m sure you’re doing better than you let on.

Dave.

 

[DBT]

. . . and probably the BIGGEST thing that feeds and sustains my prayer life is not getting caught up in the whole “multiplicity of devotion” thing - you know, adding more and more prayers and litanies to our routine as if this, in itself, will create a rich prayer life. Soon our prayer life might become more of a burden than a joy - and put the focus on “finishing our self-imposed obligations” rather than simply basking in the glow of the Lord’s presence.

To that end, the best thing I’ve learned about prayer is the tremendous value of frequent Eucharistic Adoration - I try to go daily on my lunch hour. And I rarely “do” much of anything while I’m there in the form of vocal prayers etc. I just try to “be.”

What’s the old St. John Vianney saying about the poor peasant sitting in the first pew? - “I look at Him and He looks at me.” That says it all. Be faithful to that and I know your prayer life will grow.

Dave.

BTW, if you’re looking for a good book - Brother Lawrence’s “Practice of the Presence of God” is wonderful about teaching the value of maintaining “simplicity” in prayer . . . which is what I’m really trying to say in this post.

 

[Augustine]

Hi Augustine - Long time no talk . . . hope all is going well.
By the grace of God, yes. I’ve taken a month long vacation, but I’m back now.
Well the short answer is to let them see YOU praying. If you’re comfortable with prayer, then it will come naturally and won’t appear “forced” on your kids . . . as I’ve sometimes seen.
You see, I’ve come late to the Church. My daughter is already starting college in town and my son, high-school. I’ve neglected their spiritual upbringing for too many years.
Lead by your quiet example and don’t make a big production out of it - kids see through that. If you perservere your kids will, over time, see that prayer is an integral part of who you are. Hopefully, they’ll recognize your fruits and want (maybe sub-conciously) the same thing for themselves.
Well, since Lent last year we started saying grace before meals. My daughter has already told us that she cherishes this family devotion very much. So, by the grace of God, her heart welcomes prayer.
Some examples from our household: My kids know I go to daily mass (even though they rarely join me) and they often see me praying the LOTH . . . sometimes they like to listen along.
Perhaps they should know that I pray the Rosary daily…

BTW, I didn’t know that the LOTH was supposed to be read aloud…
We pray the Rosary on the weekend . . . and my wife and I let each child lead a decade to get them involved. The younger ones love it, the older one’s grumble a bit as would be expected. We pray the Act of Charity together each morning when I drive them to school . . . again each kid gets their own day to lead the prayer.
That’s very beautiful. But, you see, I tip-toe about religious practices with them. I’m a brute with words, as you can probably have noticed in my many posts, and I fear of my ego getting between my kids and the Holy Spirit.
And maybe most important, I always look for ways to teach the virtues in their daily activities - praising them for acts of kindness, generosity, patience etc. If I can tie it back to a Gospel message or life of a Saint so much the better. Virtue is the foundation on which a solid prayer life is built.
I always praise them for virtuous acts, but the idea to tie them with the Gospel or the Saints is excellent.
Oh well, just some random thoughts. Hope it helps . . . and I’m sure you’re doing better than you let on.
It sure helps! Thanks a bunch.

 

[Augustine]

. . . and probably the BIGGEST thing that feeds and sustains my prayer life is not getting caught up in the whole “multiplicity of devotion” thing - you know, adding more and more prayers and litanies to our routine as if this, in itself, will create a rich prayer life. Soon our prayer life might become more of a burden than a joy - and put the focus on “finishing our self-imposed obligations” rather than simply basking in the glow of the Lord’s presence.
That’s a real danger. Yet, even on “dry” days I put myself to praise Him with the words He taught us or that the Church did.
To that end, the best thing I’ve learned about prayer is the tremendous value of frequent Eucharistic Adoration - I try to go daily on my lunch hour. And I rarely “do” much of anything while I’m there in the form of vocal prayers etc. I just try to “be.”
Indeed. Our parish unfortunately offers Adoration only weekly throughout Lent. AFAIK, there’s no church in a 25ml radius that offers perpetual Adoration.
What’s the old St. John Vianney saying about the poor peasant sitting in the first pew? - “I look at Him and He looks at me.” That says it all. Be faithful to that and I know your prayer life will grow.
Again, a wonderful tip. And the only way for it to sink in is to practice it.
BTW, if you’re looking for a good book - Brother Lawrence’s “Practice of the Presence of God” is wonderful about teaching the value of maintaining “simplicity” in prayer . . . which is what I’m really trying to say in this post.
You mentioned Br. Lawrence many times. It’s probably time that I’d check it out.

 

[mhansen]

DBT:

. . . and probably the BIGGEST thing that feeds and sustains my prayer life is not getting caught up in the whole “multiplicity of devotion” thing - you know, adding more and more prayers and litanies to our routine as if this, in itself, will create a rich prayer life. Soon our prayer life might become more of a burden than a joy - and put the focus on “finishing our self-imposed obligations” rather than simply basking in the glow of the Lord’s presence.

Excellent advice! If we pray because we feel we “have to”, it won’t last. Then it becomes more like work than spending time with God, which is ideally what it’s supposed to be. If we live our lives right, our ENTIRE lives become prayer, without us even realizing it.

Another book suggestion I might add is Jean-Pierre de Caussade’s “Sacrament of the Present Moment.” I’ve mentioned this one before, but it’s a biggie in my opinion. It tells of living not day-to-day, but moment-to-moment, discerning God’s will for us one moment at a time. Then, as I stated above, our WHOLE life is prayer, because at each moment we are doing the will of God for that particular moment, and nothing else. It’s a small, simple book, but one that I’ve found tremendously useful. I believe you can find it online at www.ccel.org listed as “Abandonment to Divine Providence.”

Mike

 

[DBT]

Augustine:

You see, I’ve come late to the Church. My daughter is already starting college in town and my son, high-school. I’ve neglected their spiritual upbringing for too many years.

I guess we all can say that to one degree or another. As I mentioned my younger kids are much more receptive . . . my oldest less so (I started late with him).

But then again he’s 14 so that in itself probably has a lot to do with it. Some days I think he’s totally lost, some days it appears he might be getting it. But I know he watches me very closely. Does he see my fruit or is he looking for kinks in the armor to prove I’m a hypocrite? Probably a little bit of both.

So it’s probably best to take the long view in all of this, realize it’s God who’s really doing the work (even though we lend a helping hand) and recognize, as I know you do, that it’s better late than never . . .

Augustine:

Well, since Lent last year we started saying grace before meals. My daughter has already told us that she cherishes this family devotion very much. So, by the grace of God, her heart welcomes prayer.

Wonderful !!! I’m very happy for you !!! A great foundation to build upon . . .

Augustine:

I tip-toe about religious practices with them

I know where you’re coming from with this statement. Knowing when to pick our opportunities for family prayer is key to its success . . . and reading the “temperature” of the household is probably more an art than a science. One thing I’ve learned: If a child just came home from a sleep over at a friends and is probably close to having a meltdown from staying up all night - then the first words out of your mouth as they walk in the front door probably shouldn’t be “Let’s do a rosary!”

mhansen:

Another book suggestion I might add is Jean-Pierre de Caussade’s “Sacrament of the Present Moment.” I’ve mentioned this one before, but it’s a biggie in my opinion. It tells of living not day-to-day, but moment-to-moment, discerning God’s will for us one moment at a time. Then, as I stated above, our WHOLE life is prayer, because at each moment we are doing the will of God for that particular moment, and nothing else. It’s a small, simple book, but one that I’ve found tremendously useful. I believe you can find it online at www.ccel.org listed as “Abandonment to Divine Providence.”

Thanks for the recomendation! I’ll have to look into it. From what you say, this book sure sounds a lot like Brother Lawrence . . .

My best to you both,
Dave.