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Atruthseeker2.0
Guest
I feel guilty writing this as I was already asking for help last week with prayers. Regardless here we go, since I was 11 years old I have been struggling with a pornography addiction which obviously has progressed to a breaking point which is right now. As of right now I am questioning my sexuality which I never have before as I always knew I was heterosexual. Though now I am now struggling with it and to make matters worse I have what could be a strong case of OCD even though I have never been diagnosed. Every time I think a male has an attractive feature I think immediately I am homosexual. I never ever had these struggles in the past and never found men attractive at all. I am even scared to look at men or think about this, it very hard for me not to think about this. When I don’t there’s no problem usually. In case your wondering I have viewed lesbianic interactions to a minimum so it’s not that I am looking for it. Due to the years of this addiction women do not cause that strong feeling of attraction as before nor arousal of any sort. I always prayed to overcome lust and this horrible sin which I have to an extent, but not nearly enough. To conclude my faith has been fortified over the past 2 years and it’s been fantastic, though now I am going through a dryness/darkness in prayer and have been for 7 months. It could be the dark night of the senses, but I will have to ask my priest for more guidance.
Who ever sees this thank you and I will pray for you as well.
God Bless
Who ever sees this thank you and I will pray for you as well.
God Bless
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