Pre-teen boys and emotions!

[Didi]

I need help from experienced Moms and Dads!

I have a 10-year old boy who is very tender-hearted anyway, but seems to be more emotional than usual and sometimes can’t say why he is sad or crying.

Is this a typical change that boys undergo as their bodies begin to change? What else do I have to look forward to??!!

Thanks!

 

[WhiteDove]

I don’t remember anything like that with my four boys. I don’t think that’s typical.

 

[Bill_Buck]

One thing I have noticed is that there is no set pattern for kids. I think we do a disservice to them if we prejudge based on “typical” behaviors. Your son my just be more empathetic and “tender hearted” than other boys his age.

Maybe it is more typical to hear about parents having trouble with the ten-year-old boy that is self-centered or lashing out in anger but I think the response should be the same.

Talk with him. Don’t make him feel “different” for having these feelings. Explain to him how you control your own emotions. Also remember that he will learn from your own behavior. Help him to learn to control his own emotions. Show him ways that he can take his feelings and turn them into positive actions like good works and prayer.

With guidance he will learn how to master his emotions and use them as an asset.

I know of a man who was very sensitive when he was around your son’s age.

He is still very empathetic and it serves him well both in business and his personnel life. He has grown into a good man of faith and a great father and husband.

 

[Annunciata]

Bill Buck:

One thing I have noticed is that there is no set pattern for kids. I think we do a disservice to them if we prejudge based on “typical” behaviors. Your son my just be more empathetic and “tender hearted” than other boys his age. …

With guidance he will learn how to master his emotions and use them as an asset.

I know of a man who was very sensitive when he was around your son’s age.

He is still very empathetic and it serves him well both in business and his personnel life. He has grown into a good man of faith and a great father and husband.

Didi,
I actually know many good strong men who when they were boys your son’s age were sensitive and emotional ( two in particular come to mind) and these two are as described as in the above post. Annunciata

 

[Didi]

Thanks for your words of encouragement. He is a very sweet boy and rarely needs to be disciplined because he wants to do what is right and doesn’t want to disappoint us.

We have been slowly encouraging him to “shake things off” when he’s disappointed and he’s learning not to let something bother him quite so much, but I don’t want to discourage his compassion for others.

I am wondering, though, if hormones play a part with this as sometimes he is much more emotional than others (like his 14-year old sister!). Any thoughts?

 

[khkhk]

Didi:

Thanks for your words of encouragement. He is a very sweet boy and rarely needs to be disciplined because he wants to do what is right and doesn’t want to disappoint us.

We have been slowly encouraging him to “shake things off” when he’s disappointed and he’s learning not to let something bother him quite so much, but I don’t want to discourage his compassion for others.

I am wondering, though, if hormones play a part with this as sometimes he is much more emotional than others (like his 14-year old sister!). Any thoughts?

It’s very possible that he is just maturing a lot quicker than some boys.

 

[monica_fan]

Hi Didi,
My first thought was, “I would hate to be a child today.” Many in our society have become so angry and self-centered and it must be so hard for someone like your son who is so tender-hearted.
My oldest son was/is very tender-hearted. He is now married and has a family. When he was growing up, I made sure I was home when he came home from school in case he wanted to talk to me about his day and what was bothering him. He often did and he would even bring his friends over to talk to me when they were hurting. I think this is part of the problem. Many don’t take the time to listen anymore. I can tell that you are not one of these people. I think it’s even harder for boys because some people think that when a boy is tender-hearted he is effiminate. My tender-hearted son was accused of being gay when he was only 10 because he was so sensitive and not very good in sports.

I am a little concerned that your son is crying and can’t say why.
Maybe you should take him to a doctor to make sure there isn’t a medical problem?

Didi:

I need help from experienced Moms and Dads!

I have a 10-year old boy who is very tender-hearted anyway, but seems to be more emotional than usual and sometimes can’t say why he is sad or crying.

Is this a typical change that boys undergo as their bodies begin to change? What else do I have to look forward to??!!

Thanks!

 

[Annunciata]

khkhk:

It’s very possible that he is just maturing a lot quicker than some boys.

Hey Sarah…how did you get so smart so young? Good answer! I’m proud of you…
God Bless,
Annunciata

 

[Meggie]

have him keep a journal or just write “five things that made me happy, five things that made me sad, five things that made me angry, five things that i am confused about.”

gear activities toward his sensitive and helpful side. at you church ask around for somone with 2-3 young children who need babysitting then have your son co-babysit in your home. This will talor to his maturtiy and responsibility. If its too much for him, you are right there, if he likes it then bravo, you are character building!